Advance Minutes of London Hibs Meeting, William Wallace pub, 9^th May 2000

Present : an incredible 98 existing members and 25 prospective new members attended the meeting, a club record. Most claimed to have been attracted by the quality of discussion reported in the minutes of the previous meeting, and several had friends who were keen to attend future sessions. Senior members of the committee reported as missing the last meeting in body or in mind were out in force to provide guidance on many of the issues left outstanding from the previous gathering.

In response to the overwhelming demand, which at one point had members queuing back to Baker ( as in Joe ) Street, the  William Wallace expelled customers not wishing to join London Hibs, and offered a free pint to all attendees.  At every subsequent  meeting, this practice would be repeated,  assuming numbers exceeded 50. At the new premises to which the pub is moving shortly, the landlord guaranteed that the pub itself would be reserved for Hibees ( ironic, given its name ) on meeting nights, and that a fleet of waiters would bring drinks to tables on receipt of an email request or text message ,  to avoid disruption to the highbrow debate. 

Not present : anyone who wasn’t there. A list will be  published on this website in future, the modern equivalent of the pillory

Issues not discussed :

-         The rumoured acquisition of Celtic by Hibs to achieve reunification 112 years on. This would ensure Hibs could claim to have won the European Cup at some point in our history. The subject was judged to be too sensitive for open debate

-         The results of our club’s visits to Ibrox and wherever it is that Motherwell now play

-         The confusion over the true outcome of the LHSC football team’s cup and league double – all clarified on website

Issues discussed :

-         despite the committee reporting that  we are hugely profitable and hugely unprofitable at the same time (apparently this seemed the easiest outcome to agree to ), thoughts of signing  Rivaldo, Roy Keane and Dennis Bergkamp remained uppermost in members’ minds, as reported last month. It was suggested that all famous, rich, outstanding footballers out of contract this summer be asked to join Hibs on free transfers under the Bosman ruling, and to waive their salaries in recognition of being allowed to join such a great club. Brian Rogan agreed to transmit this advice to the club and to report back.

-         It was agreed to attract the  top advertising agencies and offer  them the opportunity to bid for the rights to create the television advertising for London Hibs merchandise. A reserve price of £20 million would be put on the auction. Funds raised would be used to help subsidise the above players should they find themselves experiencing financial hardship by not drawing a wage

-         Heart of Uzbekistan were reported as having been knocked out at  the pre pre pre qualifying stage  of the 2001 UEFA cup by  local rivals Kazak Hibernians. Prospects of  Hibs meeting the former in the final therefore seemed somewhat remote, and travel arrangements being looked at by Tony Connor as a result of the last meeting would have to be changed. Reasons for hosting a European final in central Asia had receded, and the new most likely venue was the Millenium Dome which members thought might tax Tony’s skills to the limit but were happy for him to try

-         Brian Kennedy had finally succeeded in buying Sale Sharks after failing with London Scottish and our illustrious club. He was reported as saying that the spare change left after the purchase could be used to buy London Hibs, a more realistic target than its parent, and interesting nonetheless due to its footballing prowess.    ( He doesn’t know the price yet !!)

-         Brian Rogan reported that on the  proposed colonisation by Hibs of Brasil or Millwall, he had  liaised with the poison Scottish dwarf Robin Cooke at the foreign office. The latter was of the opinion that Brasil was fair game but that Millwall might provoke a major international incident 

-         The Smiths fought back, arguing that the proposed ban on their name ( see last meeting ) would have deprived Hibs of such stalwarts as Gordon, Bobby (?) and currently Tom, who also does a good job at prop for the national rugby team. It would also deprive the club of the skills of anyone with the christian name “black”, “lock” or “gold”

-         It was reported that Grant completed the London marathon in 52 minutes. The  Jubilee line extension linking Canada Water to Westminster had been helpful to the pacemakers which in turn had stimulated the runners to achieve outstanding performances

-         Grant thanked members for the tumultuous support he received during the London marathon, though he admitted not to be the person spotted running wearing a Hibees top ( there  was actually one out of 32000, which is statistically significant, and means that if there are only 3 Hibees per 100000 of the population, 30 per million, then Easter Road is too big ! )

In winding up the meeting ( ie closing remarks, not being provocative ),  Brian Rogan commented that the current HUGE enthusiasm for London Hibs was unprecedented, and he believed was a watershed, landmark and lots of other big words in the development of the club. He reserved judgement on whether the William Wallace could continue to host meetings given the exponential growth in attendance, and consideration was being given to the Albert Hall, provided their beer improved 

pp The Club Secretary

London Hibs Supporters Club

07/05/2000 (Meeting to be held on 9/5/00!)