Best work pranks

[Bridge hibs]

Noticed a few on the pet peeves thread but didnt want to derail it so I will start with this one, I am a prankster 😄

Many years ago we had a new colleague starting with us, great guy and great at his work but as thick as a brick.

We had a large tv in our howf which was boxed in and no access to the volume, channel and sound buttons other than the remote control that I had beside me.

He came in one day and started fumbling with the tv but to no avail, I told him you just have to stand close to the tv and shout instructions such as what channel you want and if you want the volume up you shout UP and if you want the volume down you shout DOWN.

He started shouting up up up for the volume and I was turning it up then he shouted down down down and I turned it down, same for the channels, we were buckled 🤣

Ten minutes later I started pressing the opposite to what he wanted and he was totally miffed, I suggested it works better with different accents and he spent another 10 minutes speaking to the tv in Irish, English and American, he was Polish🤣

[speedy_gonzales]

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oticed a few on the pet peeves thread but didnt want to derail it so I will start with this one, I am a prankster 😄

Same, on both counts.
Phone ear-piece dipped in the ink pad, calling the speaking clock and diverting to a colleagues phone, filling the water cooler with diluting juice (one of the few pranks well received).
There was a lot of mischief with other folks mugs, like placing in obscure areas and gluing to desks.
The best was when I cable tied one to the electrical trunking in the ceiling, filled it with the confetti from the hole punch and when the cut it down, the confetti spilled out.
Next day, same mug, same prank but this time filled the hanging mug with water, yeah, you can guess the rest.
My best gag of all though probably went too far as it cost the company a wee bit money. I got the spare keys to a colleagues vehicle and rolled the passenger window down, I then filled the footwell with broken glass (gifted by Sportscar Breakers out at Ratho) and placed some on the passenger seat. Another colleague, not in the gag, noticed and informed the victim who checked nothing was stolen from the van then arranged to get the door glass replaced. When the garage called explaining there was nothing wrong with the original glass, there was a few questions, most folk laughed but it took a while for me to 'fess up.

[Scouse Hibee]

We were all sitting in the canteen in the workshop when the newest apprentice entered, one of the other joiners shouted across to me, “what are you taking this year for Christmas, the Turkey or the Whisky”? I guessed straight away what he was up to so replied “the Turkey”. He then asked a few of the other joiners and they all gave an answer. Then he said to the young apprentice, “have you been into the bosses office yet and told him what you want”? The young lad said “what are you talking about” . He was convinced that we all got the choice as a present from the boss and today was the last day to make his choice. So off he popped to the bosses office (boss was a grumpy auld git). We pissed ourselves laughing waiting for him to return red faced. The door to the canteen opened and in he walked carrying a bottle of malt whisky!
The boss promptly followed laughing his head off telling us that would teach us to take the piss. 😂

[Trinity Hibee]

When I left a job, I pla(i)caed some raw fish behind a radiator and above the polystyrene ceiling tiles

[Keith_M]

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We were all sitting in the canteen in the workshop when the newest apprentice entered, one of the other joiners shouted across to me, “what are you taking this year for Christmas, the Turkey or the Whisky”? I guessed straight away what he was up to so replied “the Turkey”. He then asked a few of the other joiners and they all gave an answer. Then he said to the young apprentice, “have you been into the bosses office yet and told him what you want”? The young lad said “what are you talking about” . He was convinced that we all got the choice as a present from the boss and today was the last day to make his choice. So off he popped to the bosses office (boss was a grumpy auld git). We pissed ourselves laughing waiting for him to return red faced. The door to the canteen opened and in he walked carrying a bottle of malt whisky!
The boss promptly followed laughing his head off telling us that would teach us to take the piss. 😂

[pollution]

Not a work prank as such, but I have convinced my wife that when there is a free kick outside the box the defending team is allowed to ask the referee

if one of their players can lie on the ground behind his team mates if said player is feeling tired. Just until the free kick has been taken.

She still believes it ..

[Jack]

Confetti from the hole punch can be used for so much! My boss was a keen golfer, golf brolly always to hand although rarely used. For about a week I went round the office of about 50 collecting it and putting it my bosses brolly.

He came in the Monday laughing. He was in a tournament on the Saturday and as champion had the honour of teeing off first while everyone watched on. Great shot! Starts drizzling a bit so while the second guy readies himself at the tee my boss opens his brolly and shed loads of the stuff is all over him. The place erupted!

I used to enjoy taping down the wee black bits in phone cradles with clear sellotape then phoning them! Of course the phone just kept on ringing and they were very confused.

Turning computer screens 180 degrees if someone left their computer unlocked and various other settings.

Friends and colleagues leaving unlocked phones set to Japanese or similar.

Yes I am the sort of person that sees a tray of alarm clocks or timers in a shop and thinks ya beauty!

[Scouse Hibee]

We had a red emergency phone in the Security office at Jenners, we use to smear the earpiece with red lipstick and then one of the boys would call it, the old guy who manned the office would answer and then have a red ear until someone pointed it out to him.

[McD]

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Not a work prank as such, but I have convinced my wife that when there is a free kick outside the box the defending team is allowed to ask the referee

if one of their players can lie on the ground behind his team mates if said player is feeling tired. Just until the free kick has been taken.

She still believes it ..

I was watching tv once with my wife, and the actor Bill Paxton was in whatever was on. She made some comment about always mixing up Bill Pullman and Bill Paxton, and I just off the cuff replied that you can tell the difference because Bill Paxton has a prosthetic ear. She looked at me like I was daft, but I just doubled down and made up a story on the spot about a childhood accident with a fire, and that he wears a prosthetic ear when acting. She spent hours googling etc, and naturally found nothing. I just said that he tried to keep it quiet as he didn’t want to be treated differently. Lasted about 3 days before I finally broke and told her it was just made up on the spot.

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Confetti from the hole punch can be used for so much! My boss was a keen golfer, golf brolly always to hand although rarely used. For about a week I went round the office of about 50 collecting it and putting it my bosses brolly.

He came in the Monday laughing. He was in a tournament on the Saturday and as champion had the honour of teeing off first while everyone watched on. Great shot! Starts drizzling a bit so while the second guy readies himself at the tee my boss opens his brolly and shed loads of the stuff is all over him. The place erupted!

I used to enjoy taping down the wee black bits in phone cradles with clear sellotape then phoning them! Of course the phone just kept on ringing and they were very confused.

Turning computer screens 180 degrees if someone left their computer unlocked and various other settings.

Friends and colleagues leaving unlocked phones set to Japanese or similar.

Yes I am the sort of person that sees a tray of alarm clocks or timers in a shop and thinks ya beauty!

Used to have a colleague who was bad for leaving his computer unlocked, we took a screenshot of his desktop, set that as his background then locked it, so at a glance it looked like it was unlocked. He went mental when he came back, why wouldn’t it open any programmes or menus, threw the mouse at the wall in a rage, face bright red, until we finally told him to try pressing control-alt-delete

[Pete70]

Hid an old digital watch in the ceiling tiles above one the old guys desk and set the alarm to go off at 11am every day. It drove him nuts for weeks.

[Keith_M]

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Used to have a colleague who was bad for leaving his computer unlocked, we took a screenshot of his desktop, set that as his background then locked it, so at a glance it looked like it was unlocked. He went mental when he came back, why wouldn’t it open any programmes or menus, threw the mouse at the wall in a rage, face bright red, until we finally told him to try pressing control-alt-delete

Done that one at a few workplaces now. It's probably the main reason I have to keep finding new employment.


Years ago, when I was window cleaning, we convinced one of our teenage colleagues that we had a Dutch customer called Herz Van Rental. We used to send him to collect the money when we were done and told him to make sure he asked for Mr Van Rental personally.

Mr 'Van Rental's' missus was a bit confused the first time, till she saw us all laughing away at the end of the drive.

[Alfiembra]

My best mate is a legendary prankster, so many I could write pages about them.

Many years ago a colleague had signed up for a swimming challenge, I can’t remember the distance involved but it was several kilometres in a year, this was pre computers so everything was recorded on paper. He had a graph on the wall by his desk with a line showing what distance he had to swim every week to make his target. As the year progressed as you would expect he plotted his efforts and he had weeks when he would be ahead of schedule and others when he would be a bit behind. He was going to the pool maybe 3 times a week at lunchtimes doing multiple lengths every visit.
Once he was into the last month or so he was a bit behind schedule and had stepped up his efforts, but unbeknown to him my mate had been altering his chart for weeks when he was away knocking off a few metres here and there until it got to the point at the end of the year he was going to the pool twice a day almost every day and was almost falling asleep at work as he was so tired. To this day we don’t know how many extra kilometres he must have swam but he did see the funny side of it once my mate owned up.

[Paulie Walnuts]

Woman I used to sit beside had her husbands number on a speed dial type button on her phone. Changed the number to London Street Sauna but left the label on the screen showing her husbands name/work.

She was mortified when she phoned.

[Bostonhibby]

No really a prank to some, probably a long overdue payback-but, in the 80's I worked with a group of mates of a similar age in a small office, 4 of us were key holders and the assistant manager who was a work shy jobs worth had a locked desk where he kept all the important stuff like pens, rubber bands, paper clips and other insignificant ****** that gave him a power rush.

Not long before I was due to leave for a new job someone from our happy band got access to his magic drawer at night and did a beautiful job of carefully filling drawer and contents with concrete screed then carefully closed it.

There was much smirking in the morning, then he came in with his bunch of keys, got one in but couldn't open the drawers. Eventually prised one open and muttered various threats about careers, police, life. Truth was he remains one of the most pointless salaries I've ever seen incurred anywhere so nothing actually happened.

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[Scouse Hibee]

Not a prank as such but years ago when I lived in Liverpool, I had to go to Bolton on a Friday late morning to relevel a snooker table, it pissed me off as I had arranged an early finish that day as was going to North Wales for a wedding on a coach. There were no vans available so boss gave me the keys to his Range Rover. Anyway, I rushed to Bolton done the job, got caught in traffic on the way back and was in a hell of a rush when I got back, unloaded my tools, and jumped in my car and went home to shower and change. Just as I was leaving the house to meet the coach with not a minute to spare, the house phone rang, it was the boss asking where I had put his car keys. They were in my jacket pocket! I lied said I had put them on his desk and swore blind I had as he ranted that they weren’t there now. I could offer no further explanation, hung up and just about caught the coach to Wales. The next morning, I went in early before any of the office staff, pulled out his desk which was against the wall and threw the keys behind it. When he eventually arrived, (his car was in car park overnight) he called me to office and began asking me again where exactly I had put them, I told him I was in a rush and had thrown them onto his desk. I then began to search for him and “found” them behind his desk on the floor. The look he gave me 😂
He knew I had pulled a fast one but couldn’t prove it!

[Bostonhibby]

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Not a prank as such but years ago when I lived in Liverpool, I had to go to Bolton on a Friday late morning to relevel a snooker table, it pissed me off as I had arranged an early finish that day as was going to North Wales for a wedding on a coach. There were no vans available so boss gave me the keys to his Range Rover. Anyway, I rushed to Bolton done the job, got caught in traffic on the way back and was in a hell of a rush when I got back, unloaded my tools, and jumped in my car and went home to shower and change. Just as I was leaving the house to meet the coach with not a minute to spare, the house phone rang, it was the boss asking where I had put his car keys. They were in my jacket pocket! I lied said I had put them on his desk and swore blind I had as he ranted that they weren’t there now. I could offer no further explanation, hung up and just about caught the coach to Wales. The next morning, I went in early before any of the office staff, pulled out his desk which was against the wall and threw the keys behind it. When he eventually arrived, (his car was in car park overnight) he called me to office and began asking me again where exactly I had put them, I told him I was in a rush and had thrown them onto his desk. I then began to search for him and “found” them behind his desk on the floor. The look he gave me
He knew I had pulled a fast one but couldn’t prove it!

liked that one.

Again not a prank but car related. We drove the 300 odd miles up to see Hibs lose to celtc in the last cup final against them. Dumped the car at our digs. Met up with our mate in leith who had hired a private mini bus, duly lost, got pissed went back to our apartment, nae jacket, nae car keys. Eventually worked out they might be in the mini bus, phoned the company, checked with driver, they were there. £40 taxi journey in the morning.......


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[McD]

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liked that one.

Again not a prank but car related. We drove the 300 odd miles up to see Hibs lose to celtc in the last cup final against them. Dumped the car at our digs. Met up with our mate in leith who had hired a private mini bus, duly lost, got pissed went back to our apartment, nae jacket, nae car keys. Eventually worked out they might be in the mini bus, phoned the company, checked with driver, they were there. £40 taxi journey in the morning.......


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Went to a stag do for a work mate about 20 years ago, centre of Edinburgh, Saturday night. The following morning, I was working, as was our boss. I left a reasonable time, drove home, slept, headed into work. Boss shows up about 45 minutes late, looking like a zombie warmed up. Over the course of the day and much cajoling, he finally admitted that he’d been drinking with the group at various places until about 5 in the morning, then when things were breaking up, couldn’t find his car keys, his car was still parked at fountain park. So he had to pay for a taxi home to the east side of Glasgow, wake up his less than pleased wife, young son and baby daughter, to give him a lift back to Edinburgh to get the car with the spare key, then drag his arse to work. Took great delight winding him up for months about it

[Bostonhibby]

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Went to a stag do for a work mate about 20 years ago, centre of Edinburgh, Saturday night. The following morning, I was working, as was our boss. I left a reasonable time, drove home, slept, headed into work. Boss shows up about 45 minutes late, looking like a zombie warmed up. Over the course of the day and much cajoling, he finally admitted that he’d been drinking with the group at various places until about 5 in the morning, then when things were breaking up, couldn’t find his car keys, his car was still parked at fountain park. So he had to pay for a taxi home to the east side of Glasgow, wake up his less than pleased wife, young son and baby daughter, to give him a lift back to Edinburgh to get the car with the spare key, then drag his arse to work. Took great delight winding him up for months about it

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[Mon Dieu4]

Hearing McCoist on commentary reminded me of one time I had been watching a Scotland game, my brother hadn't, he came in and asked me how the game was going, I don't know why I came up with this but I told him McCoist had taken a shot so hard it broke the crossbar

My brother then leaves the house and goes to his pals, his pals Dad goes have you been watching the game, he goes aye what about McCoist breaking the bar, only to be met with what the **** are you on about

I got the **** kicked out of me that night

[HUTCHYHIBBY]

I don't know if it's just me but, I'm struggling to find many of these funny.

[Bishop Hibee]

First office I worked in a colleague was given the number for Edinburgh Zoo, she thought it was a random number obviously, and was told to ask for a Mr C Lyon. She phoned the number and came off the phone and told us he was out for lunch.

In another job, a colleague made up a letter from the Personnel Dept that looked like men between 18-30 were getting called up to fight in the first Gulf War. There’s always one and unfortunately Mr Gullible raced to Personnel in a right state before he could be stopped. Cue a wrap on the knuckles for the perpetrator for using headed paper inappropriately.

Last story not a prank but a true story. I worked in an office with an Alex Dick, Ronnie Dick and Phil Dick, not related to each other. One day a client phoned looking for Mr Dick to be met with the immortal reply, ‘which one, there’s a few Dick’s at Brown Street.’ Phil Dick got engaged to the lovely Joyce but had had enough of being the butt of jokes so changed his name to Gilmour rather than make his Mrs go through life as Joyce Dick.

[Hibbyradge]

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First office I worked in a colleague was given the number for Edinburgh Zoo, she thought it was a random number obviously, and was told to ask for a Mr C Lyon. She phoned the number and came off the phone and told us he was out for lunch.

In another job, a colleague made up a letter from the Personnel Dept that looked like men between 18-30 were getting called up to fight in the first Gulf War. There’s always one and unfortunately Mr Gullible raced to Personnel in a right state before he could be stopped. Cue a wrap on the knuckles for the perpetrator for using headed paper inappropriately.

Last story not a prank but a true story. I worked in an office with an Alex Dick, Ronnie Dick and Phil Dick, not related to each other. One day a client phoned looking for Mr Dick to be met with the immortal reply, ‘which one, there’s a few Dick’s at Brown Street.’ Phil Dick got engaged to the lovely Joyce but had had enough of being the butt of jokes so changed his name to Gilmour rather than make his Mrs go through life as Joyce Dick.