Hearts the banter years 23/24 season

[Not In The Know]

Article in the EEN with Naebadges talking up giving youth a chance. Code for skint, and we will not be bringing them in as many seniors players.

[Springbank]

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Yep, fair gets the hard pigeon turds off the bonnet of the Rover

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I have emailed this suggestion to the governing body of Formula 1

Lets hope they give The Famous fans the credit, when it inevitably revolutionises their sport

[Paulie Walnuts]

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Thing is, McKinley stated in February (reported by The Scotsman) that their waiting list was "approaching 3500".

While the demand is a great position to be in, it stretches credulity to suggest that - on the back of the season just finished - that they doubled their wait list in 4 months.

I doubt that anyone even questioned this ludicrous number - they believe pretty much anything they are told by a man at a podium when they are having a chicken dinner and a glass of merlot.

They didn’t just double it, you’ve got to keep in mind that if they’ve already got 14k or so season tickets, 3500 on the waiting list, then you’re looking at around 4000 people suddenly wanting to become Hearts season ticket holders that weren’t interested in February (and likely never have been interested as they’ve never had season ticket numbers anywhere near that) on the back of a period of total collapse in the league.

It’s almost as if it’s not actually true..

[Gloucester Hibs]

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They didn’t just double it, you’ve got to keep in mind that if they’ve already got 14k or so season tickets, 3500 on the waiting list, then you’re looking at around 4000 people suddenly wanting to become Hearts season ticket holders that weren’t interested in February (and likely never have been interested as they’ve never had season ticket numbers anywhere near that) on the back of a period of total collapse in the league.

It’s almost as if it’s not actually true..

Not like them to play hard and fast with the truth. Their new “kiddy on” manager is just the latest in a long list of lies coming out the PBS. “We owe the money to ourselves”, “We are now financially self-sufficient” and “the cheque for the poppy money is in the post”

[Tyler Durden]

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They didn’t just double it, you’ve got to keep in mind that if they’ve already got 14k or so season tickets, 3500 on the waiting list, then you’re looking at around 4000 people suddenly wanting to become Hearts season ticket holders that weren’t interested in February (and likely never have been interested as they’ve never had season ticket numbers anywhere near that) on the back of a period of total collapse in the league.

It’s almost as if it’s not actually true..

Yeah it's clearly bollox

My mate joined the waiting list less than 6 months ago and got a call last month to ask if he wanted a season ticket for him and his daughter. So they've either had a massive turnover of fans, or their numbers are complete fantasy.

[Aldo]

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Yeah it's clearly bollox

My mate joined the waiting list less than 6 months ago and got a call last month to ask if he wanted a season ticket for him and his daughter. So they've either had a massive turnover of fans, or their numbers are complete fantasy.

Your last bit is probably a fair reflection of the actually status.

They live in a world where the whole club try and portray themselves as BIG when we all know ( and this is FACT) that everything about them is just bang average or even small. Small stadium with small capacity. Rented training facilities and the list goes on.

They keep drumming on about it their fans actually beLIEve it.

I know this they are not interested in FACT but fantasy!

[NAE NOOKIE]

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Yeah it's clearly bollox

My mate joined the waiting list less than 6 months ago and got a call last month to ask if he wanted a season ticket for him and his daughter. So they've either had a massive turnover of fans, or their numbers are complete fantasy.

In a number of my posts I've used the figures coming out of Tynecastle, but it has to be said that in the years since the SPL / Scottish premiership has been a thing Hearts have never mentioned having a waiting list for season tickets. Then all of a sudden depending on who you listen to they have anything between 3000 and 7000 on the back of a season where they blew almost guaranteed 3rd, never made it to Hampden ( that I recall ) and if you look at comments on sickbag the football was turgid.

You can guarantee that if at any point prior to this season Hearts had a ST waiting list they would have been shouting from the rooftops about it ... now all of a sudden they allegedly have the sort of waiting list where folk have to die before somebody can get off it. Their announced sales are impressive no doubt about it ... but it has to be said, proof would be required before the waiting list figures could be looked at as anything other than pure fantasy.

Lets face it, this is a club not exactly unknown for spouting utter lies, not to mention a history of living in a fantasy world.

[Kato]

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Lets face it, this is a club not exactly unknown for spouting utter lies, not to mention a history of living in a fantasy world.

A 1970's trope with them when attendances were given was "yeah, but we don't count the main stand", so a couple of thousand would be added to any crowd to make themselves feel more bigly. Utter gimps.

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[eastterrace]

Still living up to the name Attendance FC , they do spout pish.

[O'Rourke3]

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A 1970's trope with them when attendances were given was "yeah, but we don't count the main stand", so a couple of thousand would be added to any crowd to make themselves feel more bigly. Utter gimps.

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There was a joke at school around the chairman finding wee boys on the wall and him telling them to get back in...

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[007]

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They didn’t just double it, you’ve got to keep in mind that if they’ve already got 14k or so season tickets, 3500 on the waiting list, then you’re looking at around 4000 people suddenly wanting to become Hearts season ticket holders that weren’t interested in February (and likely never have been interested as they’ve never had season ticket numbers anywhere near that) on the back of a period of total collapse in the league.

It’s almost as if it’s not actually true..

A tactic to deflect away from the fact they finished badly last season, have missed out on their transfer targets (particularly Levitt to us) so are on to going for their 2nd/3rd/4th choices and their coaching set up is a bit of a cluster****, which from what they've said to the press even, Naismith, McEvoy and the other guy don't even seem to know who's responsible for what. Hearts fan I know thinks this is impacting on the potential transfers as the prospective signings are picking up on the omnishambles so are opting for clubs that know what they are doing. This is in turn is causing unrest behind the scenes. Don't know how good his source is.

Fans are wanting to know what's going on but the club has mostly gone quiet, other than mentioning this miraculous increase in demand for season tickets.

[Aldo]

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A tactic to deflect away from the fact they finished badly last season, have missed out on their transfer targets (particularly Levitt to us) so are on to going for their 2nd/3rd/4th choices and their coaching set up is a bit of a cluster****, which from what they've said to the press even, Naismith, McEvoy and the other guy don't even seem to know who's responsible for what. Hearts fan I know thinks this is impacting on the potential transfers as the prospective signings are picking up on the omnishambles so are opting for clubs that know what they are doing. This is in turn is causing unrest behind the scenes. Don't know how good his source is.

Fans are wanting to know what's going on but the club has mostly gone quiet, other than mentioning this miraculous increase in demand for season tickets.

They are delusional and the majority think they are still getting their ‘Main’ targets as the quality players will wait for big teams to come in for them.

The don’t or cannot understand why that Aussie winger from CCM signed for Middlesbrough and not them as Edinburgh is a better place. They also have the ‘Famous’ atmosphere which no other team in the UK can replicate.

They show players the Oriam, forgetting to mention Joe blogs and his mates (paying customers) get first dibs ahead of them!

[Mick O'Rourke]

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A 1970's trope with them when attendances were given was "yeah, but we don't count the main stand", so a couple of thousand would be added to any crowd to make themselves feel more bigly. Utter gimps.

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Yes they love to express how much biglier they are regarding attendances.
Strange thing was that back in the days ,pre all seater, of pay cash at the turnstile,many times the crowds at ER would be more than the "official" attendance.
Factor in kids getting a "lift over "people doubling up,others"bunging"the turnstile guy and jumping over.
Plus as was (alledgedly) during Best's time,a couple of turnstiles "undeclared" to pay his wages and hotel bill (Balmoral)
That said,it was not in the interest of clubs to record true attendance,as it meant more for the taxman.
A wee form of creative accountancy,i think !
As earlier comments on the forum regards "bonuses"...
Where do you think the money came from to fill those brown envelopes some past Hibs teams/players got?
I have no first hand knowledge

Uncles of mine would tell stories of ER being jampacked,yet be surprised at the attendance declared later in the news/match reports..
It was even said that our record attendance v hertz in 1950(65.890)was under the actual numbers at the game.
The pish flowing down the terracing steps am told was like a waterfall.
It was the NY game so be loads of bevvy on the terraces.
Must have been some day,never mind the game !!
People couldnae get up the gangway to get to the lavvies which were way down by the turnstiles. Sardines it was.
A fair walk back and forward to the lavvy then from the main terracing/Shaws Heights.
Well that is my recollection and stories i heard/passed on.

GGTTH
And theres more !!!'

Although the hertz pie man and chairman Robinson was trying to feather his own nest and pay of massive debts (sound familiar),he was right on that they should have sold Tynie and moved to Sighthill? and a bigger stadium.
I think 25/30k was talked about at the time.
But the great Russian saviour arrived and all was barry.
Hotels! CL Football! World class players.
State of the art ground and facilities.
The must have looked south at Chelsea and wet themselves.
The world was to be their oyster !
Aye The Cheating Years,right enough.

The PBS wisnae fit for purpose then.
I last sat in their old stand at the St Johnstone LC semi final ,2016.
My bathroom is bigger than the lavvy near our seats.
And they clearly hadn't heard of Domestos!

The seat i had would have been suitable if no one was sitting either side of me !...or in front !
I dont suppose it is, even now, fit for purpose ...New stand or not !

[ErinGoBraghHFC]

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Yes they love to express how much biglier they are regarding attendances.
Strange thing was that back in the days of pay cash at the turnstile,many times the crowds at ER would be more than the "official" attendance.
Factor in kids getting a "lift over "people doubling up,others"bunging"the turnstile guy and jumping over.
Plus as was (alledgedly) during Best's time,a couple of turnstiles "undeclared" to pay his wages and hotel bill (Balmoral)
That said,it was not in the interest of clubs to record true attendance,as it meant more for the taxman.
As said in an earlier comment...
Where do you think the money came from to fill those brown envelopes some past Hibs teams/players got?
I have no first hand knowledge

Uncles of mine would tell stories of ER being jampacked,yet be surprised at the attendance declared later in the news/match reports..
It was even said that our record attendance v hertz in 1950(65.890)was under the actual numbers at the game.
The pish flowing down the terracing steps am told was like a waterfall.
It was the NY game so be loads of bevvy on the terraces.
Must have been some day,never mind the game !!
People couldnae get up the gangway to get to the lavvies which were way down by the turnstiles. Sardines it was.
A fair walk back and forward to the lavvy then from the main terracing/Shaws Heights.
Well that is my recollection and stories i heard/passed on.

GGTTH
And theres more !!!'

Although the hertz pie man Robinson was trying to feather his own nest,he was right on that they should have sold Tynie and moved to Sighthill and a bigger stadium.
I think 25/30k was talked about at the time.
But the great Russian saviour arrived and all was barry.
Hotels! CL Football! World class plyers.
State of the art ground and facilities.
The world was to be their oyster !

The PBS wisnae fit for purpose then.
I last sat in their old stand at the St Johnstone LC semi final ,2016.
My bathroom is bigger than the lavvy near our seats.
And they clearly hadn't heard of Domestos!

The seat i had would have been suitable if no one was sitting either side of me !...or in front !
I dont suppose it is, even now, fit for purpose ...New stand or not !

I was in the same stand at that game, first time I’d ever been in it as far as I can recall. Truly a dump.


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[Bushwoof]

Me too - i wanted to take advantage of our game against the Saintees to experience their old wooden stand before it got demolished, as a sort of visit to times gone by. It was indeed cramped, and rather a death trap (and that's without considering the asbestos falling on your head).
But I quite liked it, with its funny wee stairs just waiting to cause injury and death. It would have been nice to have put part of it in a museum to show how things used to be, when stadiums had a bit more character. Far more worthy of praise than its hilarious replacement - now thats' something we can all laugh at the Jambos about.

[Libby Hibby]

**** the Hertz

[Bushwoof]

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**** the Hertz

Surely that goes without saying!

[ErinGoBraghHFC]

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**** the Hertz

I concur


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[cocteautwin]

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Not like them to play hard and fast with the truth. Their new “kiddy on” manager is just the latest in a long list of lies coming out the PBS. “We owe the money to ourselves”, “We are now financially self-sufficient” and “the cheque for the poppy money is in the post”

Reminds me of the time one season when Budge announced they had secured funding of £2m. Turned out it was a £2m loan from Anne Budge.

[007]

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Now I heard they forgot to order the hotel when building the new stand.

GGTTH

We should help them come up with a name for it.

I was thinking the Championship Inn because they don't stay in the Premier.

[Green Reaper]

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We should help them come up with a name for it.

I was thinking the Championship Inn because they don't stay in the Premier.

The Balimmoral

[degenerated]

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We should help them come up with a name for it.

I was thinking the Championship Inn because they don't stay in the Premier.

The lodge

[ErinGoBraghHFC]

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We should help them come up with a name for it.

I was thinking the Championship Inn because they don't stay in the Premier.

The Rover’s Rest surely


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[Eyrie]

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We should help them come up with a name for it.

I was thinking the Championship Inn because they don't stay in the Premier.

Certainly wouldn't be the Hilton but could be the Pilf'ring.

[Jpdhfc]

I always say to one of them I know that they are not an edinburgh club they are a midlothian club always annoyed him 😒

[Libby Hibby]

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We should help them come up with a name for it.

I was thinking the Championship Inn because they don't stay in the Premier.

The Gorgie Stench

[gbhibby]

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We should help them come up with a name for it.

I was thinking the Championship Inn because they don't stay in the Premier.

The Gorgie BUDGEt Glasshoose

[leith lynx]

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We should help them come up with a name for it.

I was thinking the Championship Inn because they don't stay in the Premier.

Fawlty Towers

[Bridge hibs]

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The Gorgie BUDGEt Glasshoose

The Budgie Cludgie Bar with the Levein Latrine Lounge

[Aldo]

Surely they’ll have the Calor Gas Suite