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Thread: Wtf.

  1. #1
    @hibs.net private member blackpoolhibs's Avatar
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    Wtf.

    A Hamilton accies fan has been sentenced to 30 months in prison after raping numerous chickens of which at least 15 died due to the abuse

    Dad-of-two Shane Waters has previously been convicted of having sex with a horse and donkey, saying in a police interview that he could not control his 'urges' with regards to sexual intercourse and animals.

    The court heard how Waters, 40, also admitted to having sex with his pet Great Dane, who would bite him and growl while he did so.

    Waters came to police attention after a farmer found four dead and several unwell-looking chickens in a shed on his farm in Stonehouse on 18 September.

    After checking his CCTV, the farmer found footage of a man entering one of the chicken sheds - which had been bolted shut - and remaining inside for around 20 minutes.

    Prosecuting, Barbara Webster said: "After [the farmer] had reviewed the CCTV he went back in and found 11 dead chickens. He formed the view that something sexual had happened to them."

    Police were contacted while the RSPCA carried out an investigation, finding traces of Waters inside two of the chickens.

    After the arrests for offences relating to the chickens, an examination was carried out on Waters' dog, when traces of semen were found.

    Webster said: "In his interview, the defendant admitted going onto the farm intending having sex with the chickens.

    "He admitted he had been on the farm on nine previous occasions and told officers he would say sorry to the chickens when he was finished.

    "He also admitted to having sexual intercourse with his Great Dane at his address. He admitted that when he had sex with her. He said he knew she didn't like it and would growl and bite him."

    Sentencing, Judge Sara Dodd imposed a criminal behaviour order on Waters, banning him from owning or keeping animals.

    He must also sign the sexual offenders register.

    Dodd said: "This is a case which is as unusual as it is disturbing. On two occasions on the 18th and 19th of September you broke into chicken sheds at the farm.

    "You penetrated the anus of a number of chickens and ejaculated. As I understand at least 15 died as a result of your sordid sexual activity.


    Imagine admitting he's a Hamilton Accies fan.


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  3. #2
    @hibs.net private member scoopyboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by blackpoolhibs View Post
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    A Hamilton accies fan has been sentenced to 30 months in prison after raping numerous chickens of which at least 15 died due to the abuse

    Dad-of-two Shane Waters has previously been convicted of having sex with a horse and donkey, saying in a police interview that he could not control his 'urges' with regards to sexual intercourse and animals.

    The court heard how Waters, 40, also admitted to having sex with his pet Great Dane, who would bite him and growl while he did so.

    Waters came to police attention after a farmer found four dead and several unwell-looking chickens in a shed on his farm in Stonehouse on 18 September.

    After checking his CCTV, the farmer found footage of a man entering one of the chicken sheds - which had been bolted shut - and remaining inside for around 20 minutes.

    Prosecuting, Barbara Webster said: "After [the farmer] had reviewed the CCTV he went back in and found 11 dead chickens. He formed the view that something sexual had happened to them."

    Police were contacted while the RSPCA carried out an investigation, finding traces of Waters inside two of the chickens.

    After the arrests for offences relating to the chickens, an examination was carried out on Waters' dog, when traces of semen were found.

    Webster said: "In his interview, the defendant admitted going onto the farm intending having sex with the chickens.

    "He admitted he had been on the farm on nine previous occasions and told officers he would say sorry to the chickens when he was finished.

    "He also admitted to having sexual intercourse with his Great Dane at his address. He admitted that when he had sex with her. He said he knew she didn't like it and would growl and bite him."

    Sentencing, Judge Sara Dodd imposed a criminal behaviour order on Waters, banning him from owning or keeping animals.

    He must also sign the sexual offenders register.

    Dodd said: "This is a case which is as unusual as it is disturbing. On two occasions on the 18th and 19th of September you broke into chicken sheds at the farm.

    "You penetrated the anus of a number of chickens and ejaculated. As I understand at least 15 died as a result of your sordid sexual activity.


    Imagine admitting he's a Hamilton Accies fan.
    I fail to see how being a Hamilton Accies fan would come to light in this court case!!!!

  4. #3
    @hibs.net private member Just Alf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by blackpoolhibs View Post
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    A Hamilton accies fan has been sentenced to 30 months in prison after raping numerous chickens of which at least 15 died due to the abuse

    Dad-of-two Shane Waters has previously been convicted of having sex with a horse and donkey, saying in a police interview that he could not control his 'urges' with regards to sexual intercourse and animals.

    The court heard how Waters, 40, also admitted to having sex with his pet Great Dane, who would bite him and growl while he did so.

    Waters came to police attention after a farmer found four dead and several unwell-looking chickens in a shed on his farm in Stonehouse on 18 September.

    After checking his CCTV, the farmer found footage of a man entering one of the chicken sheds - which had been bolted shut - and remaining inside for around 20 minutes.

    Prosecuting, Barbara Webster said: "After [the farmer] had reviewed the CCTV he went back in and found 11 dead chickens. He formed the view that something sexual had happened to them."

    Police were contacted while the RSPCA carried out an investigation, finding traces of Waters inside two of the chickens.

    After the arrests for offences relating to the chickens, an examination was carried out on Waters' dog, when traces of semen were found.

    Webster said: "In his interview, the defendant admitted going onto the farm intending having sex with the chickens.

    "He admitted he had been on the farm on nine previous occasions and told officers he would say sorry to the chickens when he was finished.

    "He also admitted to having sexual intercourse with his Great Dane at his address. He admitted that when he had sex with her. He said he knew she didn't like it and would growl and bite him."

    Sentencing, Judge Sara Dodd imposed a criminal behaviour order on Waters, banning him from owning or keeping animals.

    He must also sign the sexual offenders register.

    Dodd said: "This is a case which is as unusual as it is disturbing. On two occasions on the 18th and 19th of September you broke into chicken sheds at the farm.

    "You penetrated the anus of a number of chickens and ejaculated. As I understand at least 15 died as a result of your sordid sexual activity.


    Imagine admitting he's a Hamilton Accies fan.
    Bloody weird, also, what does the team he support add to the story?

  5. #4
    @hibs.net private member blackpoolhibs's Avatar
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    Just delved into it a bit more, panic over he's not a Hamilton fan, he's from Accrington.

  6. #5
    Coaching Staff HUTCHYHIBBY's Avatar
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    That's not just a fowl, that's a red card offence.

  7. #6
    @hibs.net private member Hibby70's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HUTCHYHIBBY View Post
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    That's not just a fowl, that's a red card offence.
    A Rhode Island Red card offence surely 😁

  8. #7
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    Suddenly Ive just went right off chicken 🤮

  9. #8
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    Coq au vin

  10. #9
    Ultimate Slaver Keith_M's Avatar
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    You **** one sheep!!


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    I wish to complain about this parrot what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.

  12. #11
    @hibs.net private member lapsedhibee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Just Alf View Post
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    Bloody weird, also, what does the team he support add to the story?
    Adds a bit of colour to an otherwise run-of-the-mill Lanarkshire court report?

  13. #12
    @hibs.net private member Sylar's Avatar
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  14. #13
    Coaching Staff hibsbollah's Avatar
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    All anyone has to do is watch Aardman Films ‘Chicken Run’ movie and they will have enough pun ammunition to make this a 50 pager…

  15. #14
    Coaching Staff Wilson's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hibsbollah View Post
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    All anyone has to do is watch Aardman Films ‘Chicken Run’ movie and they will have enough pun ammunition to make this a 50 pager…
    Aye, but I'd also run out of Kleenex.

  16. #15
    @hibs.net private member Bostonhibby's Avatar
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    Could this conviction finally see the noisy neighbours thread on the PM board closing?

    Sent from my SM-A750FN using Tapatalk

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  17. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bostonhibby View Post
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    Could this conviction finally see the noisy neighbours thread on the PM board closing?

    Sent from my SM-A750FN using Tapatalk
    Don't tell me this was hermitcrab 😳

  18. #17
    @hibs.net private member Hibbyradge's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wilson View Post
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    Aye, but I'd also run out of Kleenex.
    Buy nothing online unless you check for free cashback here first. I've already earned £2,389.68!



  19. #18
    This is how we end up with **** like Covid

  20. #19
    Coaching Staff hibsbollah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SaulGoodman View Post
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    This is how we end up with **** like Covid
    Bird flu.

  21. #20
    @hibs.net private member Hibby70's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SaulGoodman View Post
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    This is how we end up with **** like Covid
    Think I just got it from a crowded train to be fair.

  22. #21
    @hibs.net private member Moulin Yarns's Avatar
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    Why did he go for chickens when there is a large black diving bird related to the cormorant that sounds like a willing participant(only way to bypass the swear filter) 😉
    There is no such thing as too much yarn, just not enough time.

  23. #22
    @hibs.net private member Hibernia&Alba's Avatar
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    What a deviant. No sympathy for him, but think of his poor kids and his family - everyone knowing what he's been jailed for. You would have to move away.
    HIBERNIAN FC - ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF HISTORY SINCE 1875

  24. #23
    @hibs.net private member NORTHERNHIBBY's Avatar
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    I Feel Like Chicken Tonight.

  25. #24
    @hibs.net private member greenlex's Avatar
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    Why did the chicken cross the Road?

  26. #25
    @hibs.net private member Bostonhibby's Avatar
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    There's no way he'd have taken on Foghorn Leghorn

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  27. #26
    @hibs.net private member Smartie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by NORTHERNHIBBY View Post
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    I Feel Like Chicken Tonight.
    I thought you might have had a more creative suggestion for chicken on the bone than that.

  28. #27
    @hibs.net private member Jones28's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bostonhibby View Post
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    There's no way he'd have taken on Foghorn Leghorn

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    Ah say boy
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  29. #28
    @hibs.net private member Bostonhibby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jones28 View Post
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    Ah say boy


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