The Yamasaurus 1st Edition

[GREEN WARLORD]

Yam-mo-be-there Dire upbeat attempt at a soul song by James Ingram (1984).

[fiolex1]

Yam Bam thank you Mam, the somewhat embarrassing condition of premature ejaculation suffered by all Yams.

Can be witnessed on most Saturdays by the "Cumming in ones pants" at the slightest hint of a corner.

[One Day Soon]

Yammie Dodger

Not a jam filled biscuit, but the owner of the Yam biscuit tin. Can generally be identified by his nefarious activities and behaviour - usually most obviously characterised by his incessant moving of the biscuit tin to a different safe house every night.

Celebrity Yam

Meaningless non-sequiteur. See 'Milligan'.

[Silversand]

Yama-Queen

Noun - The over-exageratted antics of a footballer during a football match.

This can be seen in leagues all over the world, where a footballer acts like he has been over-charged at a restaurant, and his cabbage soup arrives cold.

The Yama-Queen is most often seen when a referee dares to make a decision against a team whose owner is known to have an over-inflated ego. It is often mistaken as a desire to show affinity to the said egotistical owner, but is usually bourne out of a desire to claim the heights of "one of the 25% of the playing squad that get paid this week".

The Yama-Queen is most often followed shortly after by the mad ravings of the clubs owner.

[One Day Soon]

Yam and Bread
The staple diet for all those at Direcastle once the present transfer window closes and either no-one has been sold or those who are sold in the last five minutes go at fire sale prices.

Yucky Fud
Not as might be supposed a description of the physical appearance of our Pink Bus Shelter bretheren. In fact it is a technical East European financial services term used to describe the exact moment when a bank goes bust.

Its proper use in a hypothetical situation would be thus:
"Mickymousas Bankas" today became Yucky Fud. Liquidators are expected to begin work later this week once they finish current work in the office of "Usmall" which also went Woolworth's last week."

Yamfoolery
A mass illusion perfomed by a master practitioner. In this instance a bus shelter full of people are persuaded that they number 400,000, that indebtedness is good business, that wages greater than turnover is the path to financial health, that only Lithuanians can play football, that a final stand the size of the Sydney Opera House is "just about to be built", that anything the owner does or decides is good and proper because - well, because the owner said so - and that talking complete cobblers about Mowgli and monkeys represents a strong strategic vision for a football club.

Yamfisted
See Yamfoolery above. Part of that process and which cannot be explained fully on a family message board.

[One Day Soon]

Yam Doughnut

Technical term applied to describe the consequences of a failed fire sale in Gorgie. As in:

Vlad: "Eets fife pee em een Scotland. Transfer window iss closed. Did vee make any Yam dough?"

Yambell Ogilvie: "Nut"

Note - can also be used to describe Sergey
eg "That Sergey's right obsessed wi the lack o' cash at the PBS.
Aye, you're right. He's a total Yam doughnut"


Molineuxed

Something that can happen when a club is in extreme financial difficulty and requires to sell whatever anyone is prepared to buy at the buyer's price.

Plan F: "You've done what? Sold him for how much? He's the ****in' club captain.

Club Stooge: "I know. I know. But what could I do? We're in deep financial 5hite and there's no more money coming in suitcases and brown envelopes from the Liths. Were totally ****ed. I had no choice - it was this or not pay the wages. We've been completely Molineuxed.

[matty_f]

transfer Yamdow - a period of the month of January, and pre-season, where Yams are promised lots and ultimately get shafted. See World Cup stars, Hleb, O'Connor, Riordan, Killen, Boozy and Whittaker for examples.

[One Day Soon]

Yam Fud - Hearts supporter

Dud Fud - Hearts player

Blood Sucking Fud - Isn't that obvious?

Phantom Fud - One of the 400,000

[BroxburnHibee]

Yamcase - similar to suitcase but with extra security benefits.

Perfect for transporting sums of money long distances.

[tooley]

YAMCAUGHTGREETINONTHETELLY
A term originating in the mid 80's, it was first spotted on May 3rd 1986 at approx. 16:38.
Amazingly it was also spotted the following Saturday at Hampden Park in Glasgow.
Legend has it the YAMCAUGHTGREETINONTHETELLY was formed by a Dundee saint by the name of St. Albert Kidd of Leith.

[One Day Soon]

Yogiyammed

An unfortunate but recurrent act of synchronicity. Vast numbers of the deluded ones indulge in ludicrously unjustified acts of self-adulation in relation to the Better Team, only to subsequently be humbled and humiliated by a mixture of their own failings and the hand of a Hibernian related nemesis.

See also Yam Reality Check

[One Day Soon]

Yamasshysteria

Lose a game. Lose the plot. Lose any remaining credibility.

The Yamcaptainreturns

Unlike most film sequels this one has a plot, compelling acting, tragedy, farce and of course a happy ending.

Falls into the horror genre for some and leading edge comedy for others. Not suitable for Yam minors.

[...WentToMowAnSPL]

The YamSatan

Dougie McDonald

[Twa Cairpets]

Laughing as you drive through Gorgie on a motorbike pointing at the locals

[Bostonhibby]

Like having a chip on your shoulder about something only this time it's the whole potato unchipped e.g can arise when you lose a football match and you quickly convince yourself that the whole thing comes about due to an SFA led conspiracy and referees who are specifically out to get the yams rather than everyone else except the infirm. Can often result in vile hate filled threats being issued on message boards that allow it

[One Day Soon]

Yham!

Appallingly plastic 1980s construction featuring terrible haircuts. Constructed with a mixture of a talentless journeyman half and a more able but ultimately self-aggrandising and over hyped part.

Ended in a dramatic break up followed by various periodic episodes with the law, the courts - principally but not exclusively associated with debt - and increasingly outlandish public statements and claims. See also Yham! Rap.

Yham! Rap

A rather repetitive and patently ludicrous ditty in which a variety of excessive claims are made:

"Yham, bam - I am, a man
Vlad or no Vlad, you can’t tell me that I'm not
Do you, enjoy what you do?
If not, just hoof - don’t stay there and rot

You got debt…
You got debt…

I said debt, debt, debt on down
I said debt-debt-debt on down
I said debt, debt, debt on down
I said debt-debt-debt on down

etc

[Hibbyradge]

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Yham!

Appallingly plastic 1980s construction featuring terrible haircuts. Constructed with a mixture of a talentless journeyman half and a more able but ultimately self-aggrandising and over hyped part.

Ended in a dramatic break up followed by various periodic episodes with the law, the courts - principally but not exclusively associated with debt - and increasingly outlandish public statements and claims. See also Yham! Rap.

Yham! Rap

A rather repetitive and patently ludicrous ditty in which a variety of excessive claims are made:

"Yham, bam - I am, a man
Vlad or no Vlad, you can’t tell me that I'm not
Do you, enjoy what you do?
If not, just hoof - don’t stay there and rot

You got debt…
You got debt…

I said debt, debt, debt on down
I said debt-debt-debt on down
I said debt, debt, debt on down
I said debt-debt-debt on down

etc

Surely "debt not down"?

[DaveF]

I'm tempted to stick this in the vault as there are many fantastic comments worthy of keeping

Anyone for anymore?

[SvenNeil]

Yamamarama - tacky but tuneful 80's pop trio who set the style for modern Yamette hairstyles.

[jacomo]

Tram Project

Loss-making mess, unpopular with everyone except its narrow band of vocal supporters.

[Dashing Bob S]

Yambuses - creaky old antiquated means of asbestos-ridden transport, about to be condemed, popular only with minging old jakeys who throw their coins in rusty turnstiles before treking slowly upstairs.

[matty_f]

Yamagotchi - small electronic pet that fits in your pocket. Thrives on being left days without washing, and you can tell it any old crap to keep it happy.

[Sergey]

AmbiDexterous- A complete walloper who can jerk-off with both hands.

[Dashing Bob S]

Yamhaha - A Yam on a motor bike.

[Dashing Bob S]

Gorgage (Gorgie Mortgage) - almost unlimited credit usually offered by dodgy financial institutions about to go bust.

"I was surprised that our combined salaries were only £4,000 per month, yet a Lithuanian bank offered us a 100% gorgage on a £20,000,000 property we wanted to buy and make into flats." -Mr and Mrs Cala.

[One Day Soon]

Yammense Team

The next stage beyond big team. Involves buying Barcelona as a feeder club and adding a fourth tier to the new stand as a 'trophy zone'.

How's that new stand working out for them by the way?

[One Day Soon]

Yamboozled

But .............what about all the transfer money............where's all the money gone?

[Hainan Hibs]

YamveyDent News -

Astonishingly accurate debt level news reported by the self-proclaimed ""bearer of bad news for some on here. ""

YamveyDent News Reported Debt Level = £14.5m approx

Actual Debt = £30.48m

[SvenNeil]

Yambezzled

Siphoning off transfer cash and other assets whilst maintaining a 'cautiously optimisitic' outlook for the future

[lapsedhibee]

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Yamboozled

But .............what about all the transfer money............where's all the money gone?

And also disyambobulated: But ... what about all the transfer money ... where's all the money gone?