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  1. 23-07-2013 05:30 PM #1
    Onceinawhile
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    Hearts to bring culture to Gorgie

    Gary Locke is doing a festival show with all profits going to hearts. Ffs... Always knew they were a comedy club!
    Last edited by Part/Time Supporter; 23-07-2013 at 07:44 PM. Reason: +yams
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  2. 23-07-2013 05:33 PM #2
    Springbank
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antwerphibs View Post
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    Gary Locke is doing a festival show with all profits going to hearts. Ffs... Always knew they were a comedy club!
    Tip: don't go into the ladies toilets immediately before or after
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  3. 23-07-2013 05:41 PM #3
    Kato
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    Quote Originally Posted by Springbank View Post
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    Tip: don't go into the ladies toilets immediately before or after
    ..and especially, during.

    #splashback
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  4. 23-07-2013 05:45 PM #4
    Hibercelona
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antwerphibs View Post
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    Gary Locke is doing a festival show with all profits going to hearts. Ffs... Always knew they were a comedy club!
    Apparently he turned up at the circus and they thought they'd save money on clown make up by hiring him to do a show.
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  5. 23-07-2013 06:34 PM #5
    Kato
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    Quote Originally Posted by twa cairpets View Post
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    lockeyed
    haha
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  6. 23-07-2013 07:25 PM #6
    Dunderhall
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antwerphibs View Post
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    Gary Locke is doing a festival show with all profits going to hearts. Ffs... Always knew they were a comedy club!
    The Ladyboys of Banglocke?
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  7. 23-07-2013 07:39 PM #7
    Sanger
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    Hearts to bring culture to Gorgie

    http://m.edinburghnews.scotsman.com/...show-1-3010807

    hopefully they can be liquidated before this sick act happens!
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  8. 23-07-2013 07:44 PM #8
    Dashing Bob S
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    Quote Originally Posted by desantos0773 View Post
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    http://m.edinburghnews.scotsman.com/...show-1-3010807

    hopefully they can be liquidated before this sick act happens!
    'The trial of Gary Locke and Heart of Midlothian FC' - there are so many potential charges.
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  9. 23-07-2013 07:48 PM #9
    green is good
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dashing Bob S View Post
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    'The trial of Gary Locke and Heart of Midlothian FC' - there are so many potential charges.
    Guilty on all counts
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  10. 23-07-2013 07:52 PM #10
    #FromTheCapital
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    He should leave it till next year, he can do a ghost tour of the old tynecastle site. Imagine the screams when he gets the ghost of Wallace Mercer to take a pish on him
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  11. 23-07-2013 07:52 PM #11
    Pretty Boy
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    Apparently they are inviting fans to submit questions for the 'trial'.

    Some fun to be had here.
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  12. 23-07-2013 07:55 PM #12
    Booked4Being-Ugly
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    Quote Originally Posted by green is good View Post
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    Guilty on all counts
    Aye, theft, blackmail, corruption, deception, embezzlement for starters.
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  13. 23-07-2013 07:58 PM #13
    bigwheel
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    He could do their version of old Monty Python Sketch...

    'We are not pinin'! We have passed on! This club is no more! We have ceased to be! We've expired and gone to meet our maker! 'We are a stiff! Bereft of life, We rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed us to the perch we'd be pushing up the daisies! Our metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'We's off the twig! 'We's kicked the bucket, We's shuffled off our mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisible!! THIS IS AN EX-FOOTBALL CLUB!!




    ..
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  14. 23-07-2013 08:04 PM #14
    weecounty hibby
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    When I hear the words "Hearts" and "culture" in the same sentence I think of something that would be grown in a (Rod) Petrie dish!!
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  15. 23-07-2013 08:08 PM #15
    hibsbollah
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    I may be going against the flow here, but I hope Gary's show is showered with plaudits, and it represents a new golden period in his career so far
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  16. 23-07-2013 08:09 PM #16
    clerriehibs
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    Hibs.net's festival night out?
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  17. 23-07-2013 08:12 PM #17
    Sir David Gray
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    ‘The Trial of Gary Locke and Heart of Midlothian FC’

    Guilty, your honour.
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  18. 23-07-2013 08:15 PM #18
    Dunderhall
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    Quote Originally Posted by hibsbollah View Post
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    I may be going against the flow here, but I hope Gary's show is showered with plaudits, and it represents a new golden period in his career so far
    That sounds bloody nuts to me.
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  19. 23-07-2013 08:28 PM #19
    Hibercelona
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    Quote Originally Posted by hibsbollah View Post
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    I may be going against the flow here, but I hope Gary's show is showered with plaudits, and it represents a new golden period in his career so far
    As long as he's showered in golden stained pish, i'm sure he'll be a happy boy.
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  20. 23-07-2013 08:43 PM #20
    Bostonhibby
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antwerphibs View Post
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    Gary Locke is doing a festival show with all profits going to hearts. Ffs... Always knew they were a comedy club!

    At last the Chuckle Brothers are reforming, brought to us for one night only, Locke and Fester perform again to save the Yam.

    All proceeds will eventually find their way to Save Hearts in Trouble via the guy fae the Inch who organises the buses and after deduction of the "usual" expenses.
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    "I did not need any persuasion to play for such a great club, the Hibs result is still one of the first I look for"

    Sir Matt Busby
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  21. 23-07-2013 09:05 PM #21
    CyberSauzee
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    "Gary, are you wilful in your neglect of the use of the English language by suggesting you have the best crop of youngsters in the UK?"

    "Yes"

    "So we can now accept that Hearts are guilty on at least two counts: 1, of employing paedophiles with complete disregard for moral values, and using suggestive language to entice said nonces; and 2, of having absolutely no idea that appearing in a 'comedy' show at the Fringe will lead to even more ridicule for your morally defunct 'institution'.
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  22. 23-07-2013 09:06 PM #22
    18/03/07
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    Hibs fans could have a party in the car park
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  23. 23-07-2013 09:34 PM #23
    LeithBoozy
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    Gary will also help Martha Reeves and the vandellas, singing the old motown Hibs fans favourite, when the plug gets pulled. Dancing in the street.
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  24. 23-07-2013 09:39 PM #24
    Jonnyboy
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    On the subject of Locke .......

    After the game in Malmo I was standing talking to a Malmo fan and he told me that one of their players had transferred in from Helsinborg. Apparently the Helsingborg fans now hate him. In fact they hate him so much they've had little voodoo dolls made of him and have a noose around the neck.

    I'm guessing by now you're thinking the auld fellae has finally flipped his lid. What's this got to do with Locke.

    Well, I thought maybe there was a wee hole in the SPFL market for such dolls to be manufactured and thought maybe they could be personalised. For example, Locke's would have to be stained yellow.
    This is how it feels
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  25. 23-07-2013 10:02 PM #25
    Eyrie
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dashing Bob S View Post
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    'The trial of Gary Locke and Heart of Midlothian FC' - there are so many potential charges.
    Quote Originally Posted by green is good View Post
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    Guilty on all counts
    Quote Originally Posted by FalkirkHibee View Post
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    ‘The Trial of Gary Locke and Heart of Midlothian FC’

    Guilty, your honour.
    It's time to bring back capital punishment.
    Mature, sensible signature required for responsible position. Good prospects for the right candidate. Apply within.
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  26. 23-07-2013 10:04 PM #26
    Viva_Palmeiras
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    His experimental J-Lo tribute band "Jenni from the B-Locke" never got off the ground then? Leotard injury - Severe chaffing of the inner thigh I heard.
    "We know the people who have invested so far are simple fans." Vladimir Romanov - Scotsman 10th December 2012
    "Romanov was like a breath of fresh air - laced with cyanide." Me.
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  27. 23-07-2013 10:20 PM #27
    Dunderhall
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eyrie View Post
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    It's time to bring back capital punishment.
    One city, one team ?
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  28. 23-07-2013 10:24 PM #28
    Sir David Gray
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eyrie View Post
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    It's time to bring back capital punishment.
    Can I be the one to open the trap door?

    Please?
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  29. 23-07-2013 10:43 PM #29
    Thecat23
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    Just looked over there, had to laugh at one thread. Saying ER hasn't been bouncing for years. Sure it was bouncing along with PACKED ya fannies when we knocked you out the Scottish cup, after only 6 months as holders :D

    1-5 = Admin, please keep reminding us as it just shows how utterly thick you are. But soon as they get called on it, it's the old " The hurt is strong with this one"!! :D

    That really is all... Nighty, night!!!
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  30. 24-07-2013 09:29 AM #30
    OrdHibby
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    They already bring a culture to Edinburgh.



    Sorry i missed the words 'LACT OFF'
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