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  1. #1

    Bus To Hampden (Not a Scam!)

    I'm running a, well 'bus' isn't the word, more a luxury coach really, from the Royal Ettrick Hotel on semi final day. It only costs fifteen pounds. Just pop into the bar at the Ettrick any time between now and next Thursday with the dosh, and ask for Bobby. I'm very much a local 'face' and easily recognisable by my Benidorm tan and my extensive collection of Pringle v-neck sweaters, one of which inevitably finds its way onto my back!

    So trust me, this is not a scam.

    And when I say that this coach is luxury, I'm not indulging in the usual hyperbole. It boasts reclining seats, and has tinted windows, so nosey old 'John Law' can keep his beak out of the more nefarious activities - not that we'll be doing the same on the DBS Express!

    I'll have you guys 'whisked' -I think is the fashionable term- through to Hampden and back at such speed you'll never even believe you were in that West of Scotland slum in the first place!

    This is not a scam!

    I'm 100% Hibby through and through. My favourite player is Alex Cropley. I have never done time in my life, especially not for embezzlement, and I wouldn't be able to find Oban with a road map. I'm a 'well kent' face in the Polwarth area, and can regularly be seen walking my pit bull, Milo and my Rotty, Stuart.

    So pop up the Royal Ettrick with the spondoolays! Not a scam! You can trust in Bobby!


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  3. #2
    Coaching Staff HUTCHYHIBBY's Avatar
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    I can vouch for Bob, I recently witnessed him leaving the local corner shop where he had just purchased a carton of milk.

  4. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dashing Bob S View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    I'm running a, well 'bus' isn't the word, more a luxury coach really, from the Royal Ettrick Hotel on semi final day. It only costs fifteen pounds. Just pop into the bar at the Ettrick any time between now and next Thursday with the dosh, and ask for Bobby. I'm very much a local 'face' and easily recognisable by my Benidorm tan and my extensive collection of Pringle v-neck sweaters, one of which inevitably finds its way onto my back!

    So trust me, this is not a scam.

    And when I say that this coach is luxury, I'm not indulging in the usual hyperbole. It boasts reclining seats, and has tinted windows, so nosey old 'John Law' can keep his beak out of the more nefarious activities - not that we'll be doing the same on the DBS Express!

    I'll have you guys 'whisked' -I think is the fashionable term- through to Hampden and back at such speed you'll never even believe you were in that West of Scotland slum in the first place!

    This is not a scam!

    I'm 100% Hibby through and through. My favourite player is Alex Cropley. I have never done time in my life, especially not for embezzlement, and I wouldn't be able to find Oban with a road map. I'm a 'well kent' face in the Polwarth area, and can regularly be seen walking my pit bull, Milo and my Rotty, Stuart.

    So pop up the Royal Ettrick with the spondoolays! Not a scam! You can trust in Bobby!

    Benidorm.




    I'm assuming your account has been hacked, Robert.

  5. #4
    @hibs.net private member danhibees1875's Avatar
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    On an unrelated () note, here is that website you wanted about flights to Thailand.

    http://www.travelsupermarket.com/c/c...ghts/thailand/
    Mon the Hibs.

  6. #5
    @hibs.net private member hibee_nation's Avatar
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    Can i have 13 tickets please will meet you in Espionage. PS I'm up for anything.
    45 AND RISING

  7. #6
    First Team Breakthrough derek0762's Avatar
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    If I book said luxury coach can you pick me up at haymarket station just in case I need to hot foot it onto a train if the coach does not turn up for any reason?

  8. #7
    @hibs.net private member Bostonhibby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dashing Bob S View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    I'm running a, well 'bus' isn't the word, more a luxury coach really, from the Royal Ettrick Hotel on semi final day. It only costs fifteen pounds. Just pop into the bar at the Ettrick any time between now and next Thursday with the dosh, and ask for Bobby. I'm very much a local 'face' and easily recognisable by my Benidorm tan and my extensive collection of Pringle v-neck sweaters, one of which inevitably finds its way onto my back!

    So trust me, this is not a scam.

    And when I say that this coach is luxury, I'm not indulging in the usual hyperbole. It boasts reclining seats, and has tinted windows, so nosey old 'John Law' can keep his beak out of the more nefarious activities - not that we'll be doing the same on the DBS Express!

    I'll have you guys 'whisked' -I think is the fashionable term- through to Hampden and back at such speed you'll never even believe you were in that West of Scotland slum in the first place!

    This is not a scam!

    I'm 100% Hibby through and through. My favourite player is Alex Cropley. I have never done time in my life, especially not for embezzlement, and I wouldn't be able to find Oban with a road map. I'm a 'well kent' face in the Polwarth area, and can regularly be seen walking my pit bull, Milo and my Rotty, Stuart.

    So pop up the Royal Ettrick with the spondoolays! Not a scam! You can trust in Bobby!
    Very good Bob, before I sign up on behalf of me and 30 other mates (cash only naturally) can you confirm if you have plans to lay on a number of extra buses in case there's a rush at this bargain price? No need to tell us who the bus company actually are.

    I recognise that you have met all the yam criteria for character references by virtue of what you say about yourself, undoubtedly a diamond geezer etc. but before I go any further can I just check if you tick all the boxes in the legendary, near mythical former bare knuckle prize fighter from Ireland criteria please? - its for when the bus doesn't turn up and makes deciding whether to sue you or not a whole lot easier.

    I have checked the internet but the best I can come up with is Bashing Bomber Bob O'Tully and Dashing "with your cash"Bobby O'Tully. Just a bit worried you might be this yammish bounder under another guise

    A couple of other key questions if you don't mind - do you torch complainants houses yourself, or do you have a man who does it for you?

    Do you offer credit facilities? something where you and your associates could collect regularly against the debt for as long as the borrower lives?

    All aboard
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    "I did not need any persuasion to play for such a great club, the Hibs result is still one of the first I look for"

    Sir Matt Busby

  9. #8
    @hibs.net private member blackpoolhibs's Avatar
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    2 places for me Bob, can you pick me up from albion road outside scorpios please, i will bring the entertainment?

  10. #9
    @hibs.net private member ...WentToMowAnSPL's Avatar
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    I can't believe some folk are questioning irish fighting Bobs integrity ... He knows where you live !
    "At the end of the day, we all aspire to bigger things in our lives but one thing I can truly say from my heart is if I never kick a ball for one of these bigger clubs I would be delighted to stay with Hibs for the rest of my career. That's how highly I regard this club." Ivan Sproule

  11. #10
    @hibs.net private member hibee_nation's Avatar
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    Any chance i could pay up front for seats for the final in advance. You can square me up later if Falkirk beat us.
    45 AND RISING

  12. #11
    Testimonial Due CB_NO3's Avatar
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    I fancy Seabass for the Grand National. Who you gambling on Bob?

  13. #12
    Does the coach go to Hampden via Oban ?, and will you be having a bet on the game Bob ?

  14. #13
    @hibs.net private member Www1875hfc's Avatar
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    How do we ken yer no ah fraudster and in ca-hoots wi a yam ?

    Mind you, ahve seen yer face gaun aboot and you look respectable enuff.

    Ah'll chuck ye £180 for a few adults and a bairn

  15. #14
    Left by mutual consent! Phil D. Rolls's Avatar
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    I've been running a series of events to send a little girl to Disneyworld. My problem is that the proceeds have been used to purchase Thomas Cook vouchers to give to the parents. Will these be acceptable Bob?

  16. #15
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  17. #16
    Coaching Staff lyonhibs's Avatar
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    I'd best get you squared up for myself and my Maw, sister, Auntie and cousin who are, by a lucky coincidence, the same person.

    As of next week I'll be busy preparing myself for a charity skydive.................

  18. #17
    @hibs.net private member Bostonhibby's Avatar
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    Is anyone collecting deposits now for a bus to Europe in case we get there via the cup or much later if we get intae the top six then win all our games?

    Think we should get in there early for the best prices like. I and many others, will be happy to meet any dubious looking individual with a hard sounding assumed name in a dimly lit bar full of similar types to him with mullets, nylon shell suits and optional teeth.

    Or is there an address in the Gilmerton / Moredun area we can send postal orders to?

    "I did not need any persuasion to play for such a great club, the Hibs result is still one of the first I look for"

    Sir Matt Busby

  19. #18
    My uncle just died, good Hibby, going to organise some charity stuff in memory of him so can I have a freebie.

    If not i'll meet you in the public toilets near Gorgie to sort out the payment.

    Pretty Boy agrees.

  20. #19
    Coaching Staff HUTCHYHIBBY's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bostonhibby View Post
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    Is anyone collecting deposits now for a bus to Europe in case we get there via the cup or much later if we get intae the top six then win all our games?

    Think we should get in there early for the best prices like. I and many others, will be happy to meet any dubious looking individual with a hard sounding assumed name in a dimly lit bar full of similar types to him with mullets, nylon shell suits and optional teeth.

    Or is there an address in the Gilmerton / Moredun area we can send postal orders to?
    I believe the boy Callum that used to manage Luckies in Gorgie is already collecting deposits for a charter flight!

  21. #20
    Day Tripper matty_f's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pretty Boy View Post
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    My uncle just died, good Hibby, going to organise some charity stuff in memory of him so can I have a freebie.

    If not i'll meet you in the public toilets near Gorgie to sort out the payment.

    Pretty Boy agrees.

    Sorry to hear of your loss. I'll parachute for charity if you like. R.i.p.
    Follow the Hibs podcast, Longbangers, on Twitter (@longbangers)
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  22. #21
    @hibs.net private member Bostonhibby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HUTCHYHIBBY View Post
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    I believe the boy Callum that used to manage Luckies in Gorgie is already collecting deposits for a charter flight!
    Bit of a thread hijack, but does anyone want to buy a watch? I think I can get my hands on some limited edition Lithaunian made Russian Submariners models, one careful owner - caveat emptor since a few seem to be suffering from condensation but otherwise perfick).

    They will be a handsome addition for anyone waiting for Bob's bus to turn up. One free with every booking made on the magic bus. Available from Barathea Bob's outlet at the rear of the mens toilet in most Hearts Supporters clubs and most good retail outlets.

    "I did not need any persuasion to play for such a great club, the Hibs result is still one of the first I look for"

    Sir Matt Busby

  23. #22
    I'm not coming on the DBS Express. I like to travel to Hampdump with my shaved and bleached ringpiece (freshly done for every Hibs cup semi and final) pressed hard against the bus window. Tinted windows stop the lady drivers on the M8 admiring the work.

  24. #23
    @hibs.net private member Mibbes Aye's Avatar
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    If this jaunt is a success would you consider not doing a bus scam for the next AFC Wimbledon-MK Dons tie?
    There's only one thing better than a Hibs calendar and that's two Hibs calendars

  25. #24
    @hibs.net private member HiBremian's Avatar
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    My mate in Lagos has just come in to some unexpected money, and says he's willing to pay £31m for a seat. Can he have your bank details, please Bob?

  26. #25
    Testimonial Due Emerald's Avatar
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    I have a wardrobe I need to deliver to Largs, any chance of dropping it off on the way. Its full of Chardonnay!

  27. #26
    @hibs.net private member Bostonhibby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mibbes Aye View Post
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    If this jaunt is a success would you consider not doing a bus scam for the next AFC Wimbledon-MK Dons tie?
    Yep, put me down for that, I won't be there - where do I send my money.

    "I did not need any persuasion to play for such a great club, the Hibs result is still one of the first I look for"

    Sir Matt Busby

  28. #27
    Day Tripper matty_f's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bostonhibby View Post
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    Yep, put me down for that, I won't be there - where do I send my money.
    I'll forward bank account details for you to not pay money into.
    Follow the Hibs podcast, Longbangers, on Twitter (@longbangers)
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  29. #28
    @hibs.net private member Bostonhibby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by matty_f View Post
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    I'll forward bank account details for you to not pay money into.
    Could I not just give it to the Yam bus organiser / Boxing Bob? he seemed to do such a good job for the yam that I am pretty confident he will ensure I won't get there.

    "I did not need any persuasion to play for such a great club, the Hibs result is still one of the first I look for"

    Sir Matt Busby

  30. #29
    Ultimate Slaver Keith_M's Avatar
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    Do all the females wishing to buy 15 tickets on the bus have to have slept with you beforehand or is it not compulsory?

  31. #30
    First Team Breakthrough
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dashing Bob S View Post
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    I'm running a, well 'bus' isn't the word, more a luxury coach really, from the Royal Ettrick Hotel on semi final day. It only costs fifteen pounds. Just pop into the bar at the Ettrick any time between now and next Thursday with the dosh, and ask for Bobby. I'm very much a local 'face' and easily recognisable by my Benidorm tan and my extensive collection of Pringle v-neck sweaters, one of which inevitably finds its way onto my back!

    So trust me, this is not a scam.

    And when I say that this coach is luxury, I'm not indulging in the usual hyperbole. It boasts reclining seats, and has tinted windows, so nosey old 'John Law' can keep his beak out of the more nefarious activities - not that we'll be doing the same on the DBS Express!

    I'll have you guys 'whisked' -I think is the fashionable term- through to Hampden and back at such speed you'll never even believe you were in that West of Scotland slum in the first place!

    This is not a scam!

    I'm 100% Hibby through and through. My favourite player is Alex Cropley. I have never done time in my life, especially not for embezzlement, and I wouldn't be able to find Oban with a road map. I'm a 'well kent' face in the Polwarth area, and can regularly be seen walking my pit bull, Milo and my Rotty, Stuart.

    So pop up the Royal Ettrick with the spondoolays! Not a scam! You can trust in Bobby!
    Seems Legit...

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