How many Freudian psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two.
One to change the lightbulb and one to hold the p*nis, I mean ladder.
Sent from my SM-A405FN using Tapatalk
Results 961 to 990 of 1283
-
31-08-2021 09:18 AM #961@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Mar 2003
- Location
- on the moon, howling
- Age
- 63
- Posts
- 14,653
-
02-09-2021 09:42 AM #962@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Apr 2005
- Location
- near the libby
- Age
- 68
- Posts
- 621
Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a hotel'
He said, 'Can I examine you'?
I said, 'Be my guest'
-
07-09-2021 08:11 PM #963@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Jul 2016
- Location
- Embra
- Age
- 66
- Posts
- 445
Glass coffins, will they be popular? Remains to be seen.
-
10-09-2021 07:37 AM #964@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Apr 2002
- Posts
- 28,897
The inventor of the anagram is dead.
May he erect a *****.
-
10-09-2021 07:57 AM #965@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Apr 2002
- Location
- Spinning a Yarn
- Posts
- 26,008
I don't mind doing cryptic crosswords but the clues are usually a bit more obvious 😉 however I think the answer begins with a C.
Originally Posted by CropleyWasGod
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
-
10-09-2021 08:16 AM #966@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Apr 2002
- Posts
- 28,897
The swear filter stomped all over the punchline. Originally Posted by Moulin Yarns
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
Anatomical name for a dick (5 letters).
-
10-09-2021 08:32 AM #967@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Aug 2007
- Posts
- 10,018
Has anyone had Kentucky Freud Chicken?
It's motherf***in' good.
-
10-09-2021 12:38 PM #968Coaching Staff
- Join Date
- Sep 2004
- Location
- Edinburgh
- Age
- 39
- Posts
- 7,114
Originally Posted by CropleyWasGod
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show QuoteMade me laugh! Originally Posted by CropleyWasGod
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show QuoteThe swear filter stomped all over the punchline.
Anatomical name for a dick (5 letters).
-
10-09-2021 12:53 PM #969@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Apr 2007
- Posts
- 8,314
Took me far too long to work it out. Originally Posted by Future17
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show QuoteMade me laugh!
-
10-09-2021 01:11 PM #970@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Apr 2002
- Posts
- 28,897
I'm here all week if anyone else needs more time 😆 Originally Posted by grunt
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
-
11-09-2021 08:24 AM #971@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Nov 2013
- Posts
- 1,487
CWG, as one accountant to another, let me just say you're a debit to our profession.
-
15-09-2021 04:13 PM #972Private Members Prediction League Winner
- Join Date
- Apr 2002
- Location
- Gross Kienitz
- Posts
- 17,005
It's been a strange kind of day. First I found a hat full of money and then I was chased by an angry man threatening to clobber me with a saxophone.
-
15-09-2021 05:49 PM #973@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Aug 2011
- Age
- 38
- Posts
- 19,730
Just bought a wig for £2.
It was a small price toupeè
Do you think your security can keep you in purity, you will not shake us off above or below. Scottish friction, Scottish fiction
-
08-10-2021 07:17 PM #974Private Members Prediction League Winner
- Join Date
- Apr 2002
- Location
- Gross Kienitz
- Posts
- 17,005
Q. How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
A. Put it in the microwave until its bill withers.
-
09-10-2021 03:50 PM #975@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- May 2007
- Age
- 65
- Posts
- 31,025
What's ET short for.
Because he has wee legs.
-
14-10-2021 04:55 PM #976@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Nov 2013
- Posts
- 1,487
I could tell you dummies that abstemious is the most commonly used word in the English language with all 5 vowels in order, but that would be facetious.
-
16-10-2021 10:03 AM #977Ultimate Slaver
- Join Date
- Nov 2002
- Location
- In der Hölle
- Posts
- 35,067
Not an actual joke but I overheard a couple in the supermarket have the following conversation in the drinks aisle in Asda...
Girl: "Is that still water?"
Guy: "Well unless Jesus has been here recently, it probably is"
-
25-10-2021 08:09 PM #978@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- May 2002
- Location
- I live for dull football
- Posts
- 53,709
I used to suffer from premature ejaculation but I was too shy and embarrassed to do anything about.
I eventually worked up the courage to go to the doctor, showed her my ***** and said "I'm worried I might be premature."
She said "You certainly are. I'm the receptionist"!
-
02-11-2021 04:50 PM #979@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Aug 2011
- Age
- 38
- Posts
- 19,730
Why did the Beatles split up?
Paul drank a Red Bull.
Do you think your security can keep you in purity, you will not shake us off above or below. Scottish friction, Scottish fiction
-
02-11-2021 09:43 PM #980Testimonial Due
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
- Posts
- 2,460
Only the band the beatles could have been! Originally Posted by Northernhibee
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
Sent from my SM-G991B using Tapatalk
-
03-11-2021 10:39 AM #981@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- May 2002
- Location
- I live for dull football
- Posts
- 53,709
Very good 👍 Originally Posted by Northernhibee
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
-
03-11-2021 06:50 PM #982@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Nov 2013
- Posts
- 1,487
My boy was born in my motor on the way to hospital. I hope he likes being called Carson.
-
04-11-2021 01:39 PM #983Ultimate Slaver
- Join Date
- Nov 2002
- Location
- In der Hölle
- Posts
- 35,067
I went to watch a UB40 tribute band last night, called WD40.
They were a bit rough at first but really got into their rhythm after a while.
-
04-11-2021 02:56 PM #984Testimonial Due
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
- Posts
- 4,298
New record for me, 2 days to get it. Originally Posted by Northernhibee
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
-
04-11-2021 03:33 PM #985@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Apr 2005
- Location
- near the libby
- Age
- 68
- Posts
- 621
Still trying to work it out..... Originally Posted by Killiehibbie
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
Sent from my SM-G988B using Tapatalk
-
04-11-2021 03:41 PM #986Testimonial Due
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
- Posts
- 4,298
Another 2 days and I'll tell you. Originally Posted by alhibby
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
-
04-11-2021 04:12 PM #987@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Apr 2002
- Location
- Spinning a Yarn
- Posts
- 26,008
I think, if you don't get it right away then, it's either not worth the effort or isn't even a joke. 😉 Originally Posted by Killiehibbie
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show QuoteThere is no such thing as too much yarn, just not enough time.
-
04-11-2021 04:14 PM #988@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- Apr 2002
- Posts
- 28,897
You can work it out, and get it straight, or say goodnight. Originally Posted by alhibby
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
OR
Won't you listen to what the man said?
-
04-11-2021 04:24 PM #989Testimonial Due
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
- Posts
- 4,298
Mull(of Kintyre) it over a bit longer. Originally Posted by Moulin Yarns
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
-
04-11-2021 06:10 PM #990@hibs.net private member
- Join Date
- May 2002
- Location
- I live for dull football
- Posts
- 53,709
The ones which take a while for the penny to drop are often great, imo. Originally Posted by Moulin Yarns
This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
Some are definitely hopeless, but that's true of any type of joke.
Reply With Quote| Log in to remove the advert |
Bookmarks