Man takes a vacuum flask back to shop and says to the owner that it doesn't work. Shop owner says it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold, what did you put in it? The man says two cups of coffee and a choc ice.
Results 811 to 829 of 829
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01-01-2021 05:19 PM #811
- Join Date
- Aug 2005
- Location
- Nearby
- Posts
- 1,101
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01-01-2021 05:52 PM #812
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01-01-2021 06:26 PM #813
At the cinema.
ME: Two tickets please!
CASHIER: For the Hobbit?
ME: How dare you sir, she's my wife.
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03-01-2021 11:45 PM #814
Google "South Yorkshire police operations complex" and check out the address.
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04-01-2021 12:22 AM #815This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
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04-01-2021 12:28 AM #816This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
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04-01-2021 09:11 AM #817This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
Tinsley, Sheffield S9 1XX
https://maps.app.goo.gl/mZjMXJYYVoQdjUqK9WASH YOUR HANDS, WEAR A MASK, KEEP 2M APART AND GET THE VACCINE
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04-01-2021 10:14 AM #818This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
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11-01-2021 02:40 PM #820
Malky Deidde who spent his life stressing his surname was 'deed' has collapsed. Was airlifted to hospital where he was pronounced dead.
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11-01-2021 05:03 PM #821This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
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12-01-2021 11:01 PM #822This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
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12-01-2021 11:05 PM #823This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
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12-01-2021 11:19 PM #824This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
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13-01-2021 10:30 AM #825This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
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15-01-2021 03:26 PM #826
My car broke down this morning.
Someone stopped to help. I said: "Are you a mechanic?"
"No a chiropodist" he said..
So he gave me a toe.
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Yesterday 01:12 PM #827
Just had a wardrobe delivered by IKEA, not a single screw, bracket,
dowel, nothing, I thought **** me you couldn't make it up.
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Yesterday 09:02 PM #828
Bought a lettuce from a wee local shop called Momma's and Papa's, I can't eat it because all the leaves are brown.
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Yesterday 09:22 PM #829
A couple were cuddling up in bed on their wedding night; 'Darling' the bride said. 'I have a confession....I used to be a hooker'. Taken aback the groom thought for a while and then replied: 'actually that's quite erotic....tell me about it'. 'Well' she replied. 'My name was Nigel and I played for Wigan'
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