hibs.net Messageboard

 

Page 26 of 26 FirstFirst ... 16242526
Results 751 to 778 of 778
  1. #751
    Testimonial Due c31's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Location
    London
    Posts
    1,062
    Blog Entries
    1
    What's made of leather and sounds like a sneeze ?
    A Shoe


  2. Log in to remove the advert

  3. #752
    @hibs.net private member J-C's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Age
    62
    Posts
    21,317
    I like how KFC give me 4 portions of chips with a bargain bucket, as if I'm sharing with anyone.

  4. #753
    @hibs.net private member J-C's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Age
    62
    Posts
    21,317
    Mick and paddy were outside the pub adding their money together and had 85 pence, "lets buy a sausage I have an idea" said mick, they walk into the next pub order two pints, a short each and down them!
    Paddy drops on his knees pulls the sausage out of micks flies and starts sucking on it!
    They get kick out of the pub!
    Next pub they do the same and the same thing happens again!....
    By the tenth pub paddy says to mick "I can't keep doing this my knees are killing me"!
    To which mick replies.....
    "thank **** for that! I lost the sausage in the 2nd pub".....

  5. #754
    @hibs.net private member CmoantheHibs's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Chiang Mai
    Posts
    1,097
    What is the difference between man flu and a baby born 7 days ago?

    Nothing they’re both just a week old.

  6. #755
    Pun Lovin' Criminal Northernhibee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Age
    35
    Posts
    11,549
    I never thought I’d quit my job as a beekeeper.

    Then I saw her face...


    Do you think your security can keep you in purity, you will not shake us off above or below. Scottish friction, Scottish fiction

  7. #756
    @hibs.net private member Hibbyradge's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    I live for dull football
    Posts
    43,269
    Quote Originally Posted by Northernhibee View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    I never thought I’d quit my job as a beekeeper.

    Then I saw her face...
    Not bad, sir, not bad at all.
    Buy nothing online unless you check for free cashback here first. I've already earned £2,389.68!



  8. #757
    @hibs.net private member Mibbes Aye's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    14,089
    Quote Originally Posted by Northernhibee View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    I never thought I’d quit my job as a beekeeper.

    Then I saw her face...
    Liked thar
    There's only one thing better than a Hibs calendar and that's two Hibs calendars

  9. #758
    @hibs.net private member NORTHERNHIBBY's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Last Train to Skaville
    Age
    55
    Posts
    11,428
    Quote Originally Posted by Northernhibee View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    I never thought I’d quit my job as a beekeeper.

    Then I saw her face...


    Slow burner, but worth it ...

  10. #759
    @hibs.net private member CropleyWasGod's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Posts
    24,790
    Quote Originally Posted by Northernhibee View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    I never thought I’d quit my job as a beekeeper.

    Then I saw her face...
    On the same theme.

    My partner said she would leave me if I didn't stop my obsession with the Monkees.

    I thought she was joking.

    And then I saw her face..

  11. #760
    @hibs.net private member alhibby's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    near the libby
    Age
    64
    Posts
    477
    I ate a kids meal in McDonald’s this morning. His mum was furious.

  12. #761
    @hibs.net private member Hermit Crab's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    Given up my ST
    Age
    36
    Posts
    27,289
    How does a deaf gynaecologist communicate with their patients?

    They lip read.
    Hibs.nets negative posting legend and unofficial ticket agent.

  13. #762
    A man goes to the optician for eye test.
    They put a contraption on his face and ask him “what can you see”?
    I see empty football stadia, empty theatres, closed pubs and almost no traffic.


    Ah that’s perfect says the optician


    You have 2020 vision

  14. #763
    @hibs.net private member Moulin Yarns's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Spinning a Yarn
    Posts
    17,435
    "Doctor, I feel kind of blue"

    Don't worry you have Mild Davis"
    WASH YOUR HANDS, WEAR A MASK, IT'S NOT TOO MUCH TO ASK.

  15. #764
    @hibs.net private member J-C's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Age
    62
    Posts
    21,317
    Little Suzie walks into a pet shop and asks the owner, can I have a wittle bunny wabbit? The owner thinks this is adorable so gets on his knees and asks: would you like a little black one, a little white one, or one with little spots. Little Suzie stands up and says, I don't think my python will give a flying ****!

  16. #765
    @hibs.net private member J-C's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Age
    62
    Posts
    21,317
    I went into a Chinese last night and the guy said to me, "Woh cha woh!" So I answered, "Sweet and sour chicken please."He said, "No, woh cha woh......... the paint's still wet!

  17. #766
    @hibs.net private member Future17's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Edinburgh
    Age
    36
    Posts
    6,678
    Quote Originally Posted by J-C View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    I went into a Chinese last night and the guy said to me, "Woh cha woh!" So I answered, "Sweet and sour chicken please."He said, "No, woh cha woh......... the paint's still wet!
    A joke that definitely works better verbally.

  18. #767
    @hibs.net private member CropleyWasGod's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Posts
    24,790
    Quote Originally Posted by Future17 View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    A joke that definitely works better verbally.
    Worked for Gerard Kelly in 1979 😆

  19. #768
    @hibs.net private member alhibby's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    near the libby
    Age
    64
    Posts
    477
    You thought 2020 couldn't get any worse?

    Chris Rea's car has failed its mot.

    Sent from my SM-G988B using Tapatalk

  20. #769
    @hibs.net private member Hibbyradge's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    I live for dull football
    Posts
    43,269
    Quote Originally Posted by alhibby View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    You thought 2020 couldn't get any worse?

    Chris Rea's car has failed its mot.

    Sent from my SM-G988B using Tapatalk
    That's good news.
    Buy nothing online unless you check for free cashback here first. I've already earned £2,389.68!



  21. #770
    @hibs.net private member Moulin Yarns's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Spinning a Yarn
    Posts
    17,435
    Quote Originally Posted by alhibby View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    You thought 2020 couldn't get any worse?

    Chris Rea's car has failed its mot.

    Sent from my SM-G988B using Tapatalk
    Thumbing a lift home for Christmas doesn't have the same ring to it.
    WASH YOUR HANDS, WEAR A MASK, IT'S NOT TOO MUCH TO ASK.

  22. #771
    @hibs.net private member CropleyWasGod's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Posts
    24,790
    Quote Originally Posted by Hibbyradge View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    That's good news.
    You're a fool if you think it's over.

  23. #772
    Private Members Prediction League Winner Hibrandenburg's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Brandenburg
    Posts
    13,106
    Quote Originally Posted by CropleyWasGod View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    You're a fool if you think it's over.
    No please don't turn this into a puns thread, that's the road to hell.

  24. #773
    @hibs.net private member Moulin Yarns's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Spinning a Yarn
    Posts
    17,435
    Quote Originally Posted by Hibrandenburg View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    No please don't turn this into a puns thread, that's the road to hell.
    There's Nothing to fear.
    WASH YOUR HANDS, WEAR A MASK, IT'S NOT TOO MUCH TO ASK.

  25. #774
    @hibs.net private member Hibbyradge's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    I live for dull football
    Posts
    43,269
    Quote Originally Posted by Moulin Yarns View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    There's Nothing to fear.
    Fear of (his) music?

    New rabbit hole now open for business...
    Buy nothing online unless you check for free cashback here first. I've already earned £2,389.68!



  26. #775
    @hibs.net private member Moulin Yarns's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Spinning a Yarn
    Posts
    17,435
    Quote Originally Posted by Hibbyradge View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    Fear of (his) music?

    New rabbit hole now open for business...
    Ah yes, God's great banana skin right there
    WASH YOUR HANDS, WEAR A MASK, IT'S NOT TOO MUCH TO ASK.

  27. #776
    @hibs.net private member CropleyWasGod's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Posts
    24,790
    Quote Originally Posted by Hibbyradge View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    Fear of music?

    New rabbit hole now open for business...
    How did I get here?

  28. #777
    @hibs.net private member Hiber-nation's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Musselburgh
    Age
    62
    Posts
    15,514
    Quote Originally Posted by CropleyWasGod View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    How did I get here?
    You're on the road to nowhere now.

    Why doesn't someone start up a puns thread

  29. #778
    @hibs.net private member CropleyWasGod's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Posts
    24,790
    Quote Originally Posted by Hiber-nation View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    You're on the road to nowhere now.

    Why doesn't someone start up a puns thread
    Some psycho killer would just ruin it with fitba chat.
    Last edited by CropleyWasGod; Today at 02:44 PM.

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
hibs.net ©2020 All Rights Reserved
- Mobile Leaderboard (320x50) - Leaderboard (728x90)