The Yamasaurus 1st Edition

[Smartie]

Naismith

A peculiar, furry-bonced little nugget who somehow thinks it is preferable to play hoofball on a ploughed field (see previous post) to playing for an improving Kilmarnock side on a good, regulation synthetic pitch.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/42983905

[Tornadoes70]

Teatime Jackanory Tales from the Book of Leveinicus -

Slyly manufacture and embellish tales of wrongdoing against the biggest club in the league whereby one will remain in the news despite one's club being very boring and uninteresting.









mon the cabbage!!!

[Alfiembra]

Brassneckius Leveinisadickopod

An extinct dinosaur who's defense mechanism was to deceive and deflect.
Always ready with an excuse and with 6 fingers on each hand could point at multiple scapegoats at a time.
Drinks from puddles.

[snooky]

Yambesi River - Famous for the unobstructed Walker Falls look-off.

[snooky]

Cathstatrophy - the sudden realisation that you hung the wrong man.

[Austinho]

Natural Odour – the sweet stench of sour grapes over in Gorgie once again.

[One Day Soon]

Yamrectile Stadium Dysfunction:

The inability to construct something properly, at the right time or to completion. Underlying cause: Level Playing Field syndrome.

Without significant and expensive treatment the condition can be permanent, ultimately resulting in reversion to both 5-1 Obsession Complex and Rover grille badge polishing therapy.

[Springbank]

16 year olds

"can't vote, can't drink, can't drive, but they CAN experience humiliating derby defeats in a maroon jersey"

[Liberal Hibby]

Albeit - a clever sounding word improperly used for the word 'but'. Can be used with a dash (-) for added emphasis when trying to appear really, really clever and knowledgeable when addressing the massed yams in statements on a poorly built and over budget main stand eg:

I find it hard to believe it is now 6 months since I gave a full briefing – albeit, I hope our regular updates on specifics have ensured the big picture continues to be well understood.

[bawheid]

“Backing”:

Backing

[Hibbyradge]

Albeit - a clever sounding word improperly used for the word 'but'. Can be used with a dash (-) for added emphasis when trying to appear really, really clever and knowledgeable when addressing the massed yams in statements on a poorly built and over budget main stand eg:

I find it hard to believe it is now 6 months since I gave a full briefing – albeit, I hope our regular updates on specifics have ensured the big picture continues to be well understood.

Although? :dunno:

[Hibbyradge]

“Backing”:

Backing

:hilarious

:top marks

[highland hibbee]

Albeit - a clever sounding word improperly used for the word 'but'. Can be used with a dash (-) for added emphasis when trying to appear really, really clever and knowledgeable when addressing the massed yams in statements on a poorly built and over budget main stand eg:

I find it hard to believe it is now 6 months since I gave a full briefing – albeit, I hope our regular updates on specifics have ensured the big picture continues to be well understood.

Albeit is better known as a word which requires only the changing of one letter, the “I” for an “r” to re-invent itself as Albert, a word that when linked with the four letter word Kidd, becomes synonymous with a major part of Hearts history, that of the double winning team of 1986. And of one particular game in which their current manager excelled and put in a superhuman performance on the day they won part one of that double. Albeit , Albert Kidd, had other thoughts......

[Viva_Palmeiras]

Getting off at Haymarket - not quite making it to your desired final destination. See 1986 and all that....

[jgl07]

Getting off at Haymarket - not quite making it to your desired final destination. See 1986 and all that....

The Yams never got anywhere near Haymarket. Getting off at Croy is nearer the mark.

[Greenfly]

BUDGE : move or shift position (especially in relation to timescales, costs etc. in building projects)

[Mixu62]

Twenty thousand - any number around 19,500 can be rounded up to twenty thousand. One for the yamenomics teachers.

[Liberal Hibby]

BUDGE : move or shift position (especially in relation to timescales, costs etc. in building projects)

Quality :top marks

[KerPlunk]

Defects Liability Period :- The time between realising you’ve signed / loaned a bunch of talentless hammer throwers and managing to offload same to Metalursk Vladivostok or Lincoln Red Imps.

[Treadstone]

Communal: shared between a community

Or

The cludgie is inaccessible when anymore than two patrons want to use it let's take over the ladies.

[snooky]

BUDGE : move or shift position (especially in relation to timescales, costs etc. in building projects)

:aok: Good Annswer :wink:

[Keith_M]

"Scrappy Goals": What the opposition score when you haven't had a single shot at goal of your own in the whole game.

[Famous Fiver]

'backing'

geez yer money, ya deluded fools.

[Famous Fiver]

'you know'

I haven't got a frigging clue.

[jacomo]

"Scrappy Goals": What the opposition score when you haven't had a single shot at goal of your own in the whole game.


“Nothing much in it.”

Just a 2-0 pasting this time.

[Arch Stanton]

"Silence"

Allowable criticism of anything Hearts related.

[Kato]

'you know'

I haven't got a frigging clue.

I haven't got a frigging clue so if you have could you tell me, please.

[Famous Fiver]

She used 'you know' to cover every point she didn't have a clue about.

Floundered her way through the whole interview.

[Pretty Boy]

Stadium Tour - A walk round a building site.

[hibbyfraelibby]

U/11 & U/16 season ticket = Ripping of ypur fans and panicking when they see through your naked money grab forcing you to add back the missing 2 years to both to stave of financial meltdown

[AltheHibby]

Money Pit:

1.Comedy film from 1986* starring Tom Hanks and Shelley Long. "A young couple struggles to repair a hopelessly dilapidated house". (description courtesy IMDB)

2. Comedy from 2017/18/19/20/+++ starring Mrs Budge and Craig Levein. An older couple struggles to repair a hopelessly dilapidated house.

Edit : that was a classic year for comedies with our neighbours releasing 2 in a week.

[Hakim Sar]

Piazza per l'applauso solista - literally the square for the solo clapper. Similar to a driveway leading to a garage, this decorative assortment of paving is largely the domain of culturally insignificant, but nonetheless extremely popular football clubs, whose stadiums are often likened to the grand old Colosseum of Rome, hence the preference for the Italian "Piazza".

[Ozymandias]

Vanacek

Term used in business to describe the exchange of goods of dubious provenance.

Agent "Psst. Craig. You vant real good football man?"
Levein" "Oh yes. Cash or do you Vanacek?"

[Speedway]

It's Yammassive - Phrase used to describe something comparatively small by Hibs standards but big by Livingston standards.

[superfurryhibby]

It's Yammassive - Phrase used to describe something comparatively small by Hibs standards but big by Livingston standards.

:top marks

Like this.

[Treadstone]

Vanacek

Term used in business to describe the exchange of goods of dubious provenance.

Agent "Psst. Craig. You vant real good football man?"
Levein" "Oh yes. Cash or do you Vanacek?"

Vanacek

Alternative meaning an item acquired with great anticipation. Used immediately and then left to decay and then discarded. Mainly Eastern European.

[Greenfly]

Vanacek : unfit (literally) for purpose.

[Speedway]

Yamanagerial Appointment

A 'tortuous process' which is nevertheless 'done properly' consisting of five key steps:

1. The sacking the current manager for sinking the team towards the bottom of the table, missing out on first and second choice targets and then entering into protracted negotiations with someone who doesn't want the job and was sacked from their previous job so having no win in 10 games.

2. The third choice man who doesn't want the job (TTCMWDWTJ) is then courted to join the club by the man that the club has just sacked, by showing the man who doesn't want the job, the training facility that they don't own, the main stand that they haven't finished building and the expensively assembled squad which isn't performing.

3. Then the offer is increased to the third choice man who doesn't want the job, based on the fact that he doesn't want the job, who then requires the club to pay off the club who sacked the man who doesn't want the job in order for him to take the job he doesn't want.

4. This creates a 'stumbling block' and an ever growing addiction to financial doping is ignored all the while.

5. However, this process is 'done properly' although it is 'tortuous' which means 'we take ages because no-one wants the gig'

[Aldo]

Yamanagerial Appointment

A 'tortuous process' which is nevertheless 'done properly' consisting of five key steps:

1. The sacking the current manager for sinking the team towards the bottom of the table, missing out on first and second choice targets and then entering into protracted negotiations with someone who doesn't want the job and was sacked from their previous job so having no win in 10 games.

2. The third choice man who doesn't want the job (TTCMWDWTJ) is then courted to join the club by the man that the club has just sacked, by showing the man who doesn't want the job, the training facility that they don't own, the main stand that they haven't finished building and the expensively assembled squad which isn't performing.

3. Then the offer is increased to the third choice man who doesn't want the job, based on the fact that he doesn't want the job, who then requires the club to pay off the club who sacked the man who doesn't want the job in order for him to take the job he doesn't want.

4. This creates a 'stumbling block' and an ever growing addiction to financial doping is ignored all the while.

5. However, this process is 'done properly' although it is 'tortuous' which means 'we take ages because no-one wants the gig'

Superb! [emoji23]


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[Treadstone]

Stendel
An appointed saviour with little justification usually after a tumultuous period. Small moments are celebrated to appease the conscience of followers.

[bawheid]

All or Nothing: Yamchester City.

Behind the scenes documentary featuring the trials and tribulations of one of Europe’s biggest clubs as they chase Champions League glory. In Season One, watch as they lull their rivals (Celtic, Liverpool, PSG and Barcelona) (definitely not Hibs) into a false sense of security by sacking their manager, captain and best midfielder, installing a novelty dwarf in goal and finishing bottom of the Scottish Premiership, whilst running up a wage bill that would make Roman Abramovich‘s eyes water.

In this week’s episode, Craig reminds Ann of the compromising photographs contained in a brown envelope in his desk, and Liam, Daniel and Steven compare wage slips during a boozy lunch with adoring fans at the Diggers.

[Cat Stanton]

Stendel (2)

A near-dangerous amount of alcohol intake, chiefly employed as a coping mechanism for dealing with the stresses of imminent relegation e.g. "FFS we're pish and we're going doon - I'm off oot for Stendel".

Named after one of the 21st century's foremost footballing stressed alcoholics.

[Eyrie]

Stendel (3)

Any object with negative buoyancy (eg "they sank like a Stendel").

[Cataplana]

Escalator: device used to double the cost of even the most straightforward projects. For example, after using an escalator, the price of a bag of chips increased from £1.50 to £22 million, in a short space of time.

[Sammy7nil]

Yamanagerial Appointment

A 'tortuous process' which is nevertheless 'done properly' consisting of five key steps:

1. The sacking the current manager for sinking the team towards the bottom of the table, missing out on first and second choice targets and then entering into protracted negotiations with someone who doesn't want the job and was sacked from their previous job so having no win in 10 games.

2. The third choice man who doesn't want the job (TTCMWDWTJ) is then courted to join the club by the man that the club has just sacked, by showing the man who doesn't want the job, the training facility that they don't own, the main stand that they haven't finished building and the expensively assembled squad which isn't performing.

3. Then the offer is increased to the third choice man who doesn't want the job, based on the fact that he doesn't want the job, who then requires the club to pay off the club who sacked the man who doesn't want the job in order for him to take the job he doesn't want.

4. This creates a 'stumbling block' and an ever growing addiction to financial doping is ignored all the while.

5. However, this process is 'done properly' although it is 'tortuous' which means 'we take ages because no-one wants the gig'

:aok::top marks

[Sammy7nil]

All or Nothing: Yamchester City.

Behind the scenes documentary featuring the trials and tribulations of one of Europe’s biggest clubs as they chase Champions League glory. In Season One, watch as they lull their rivals (Celtic, Liverpool, PSG and Barcelona) (definitely not Hibs) into a false sense of security by sacking their manager, captain and best midfielder, installing a novelty dwarf in goal and finishing bottom of the Scottish Premiership, whilst running up a wage bill that would make Roman Abramovich‘s eyes water.

In this week’s episode, Craig reminds Ann of the compromising photographs contained in a brown envelope in his desk, and Liam, Daniel and Steven compare wage slips during a boozy lunch with adoring fans at the Diggers.

:tee hee::tee hee:

[Bostonhibby]

Stendel (4)

A very large capacity beer vessel, much greater capacity than the traditional Oktoberfest Stein, often referred to as the Barnsley barrel or the Gorgie growler where it is especially popular amongst football fans celebrating a defeat, a relegation or the occasional draw.

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[hibbyfraelibby]

Foundation of Hearts - the underlying ground support structure on which a high capacity, open to the elements, bus shelter is built...4 feet too low to see the castle from.

[Pretty Boy]

A Budge - A process by which someone goes from saviour to villain in a relatively short period of time (eg 'between Palm Sunday and Good Friday Jesus done a Budge').

[Northernhibee]

Gegendepressin’

A style of football that although attack minded will lead you to scoring less and conceding more than the style of Craig “4-6-0” Levein.

[Speedway]

Gegendepressin’

A style of football that although attack minded will lead you to scoring less and conceding more than the style of Craig “4-6-0” Levein.

Very good!

[Viva_Palmeiras]

A Stendel. A confused creature. Possibly - human / lizard cross speaking fluent German with a smattering of comedic English.

Often seen with head in hands or flicking tongue whilst deep in contemplation (but not for long periods)

[Northernhibee]

The Budge That Won't Judge - a company owner or manager who will keep employing you in different roles, despite constantly failing at their job, hiring humpty employees, embarrassing his employer with statements like "natural order" and generally walks around looking like a depressed onion.

[Eyrie]

Gardening Levein - a period when you continue to receive your salary from your employer despite being relieved of your duties due to incompetence.

[O'Rourke3]

Gardening Levein - a period when you continue to receive your salary from your employer despite being relieved of your duties due to incompetence.Costin McPhee. Vestigial coach. Similar situation to Gardening Levein without the need to come to work.

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[Springbank]

An avdizaj

A boaster without reason, see also "all mouth and no trousers (Lord Foulkes)"

Derived from the hearts player Donis Avdizaj who boasted he scored in every city he went to.

The Yamasaurus is left to conclude he must have been referring to "off the field" activities in the minging fleshpots of Dingwall, Perth, Gorgie and beyond.

[PatHead]

Superdraw-the ability to make out an average draw at home - such as a 1-1 draw against a team who had been humped 3 0 by your nearest neighbours or 2 2 against the second worst team who had 10 men for 70 minutes - is a great result.

[Smartie]

Daniel - an utterly pish football manager.

“Mate - see Cambridge have sacked Calderwood?”

“Aye. He’s a ****ing Daniel, that clown.”

[Hibs4185]

Budged it - ability to spend £30 million of other people’s money and get your club relegated.

[Captain Trips]

Stendel's Tongue - An action of somebody in deep thought over what is a dire situation

Purser "Captain Smith all hope is gone the band though are still playing and we have offloaded many of the women and children, what shall we do are you ok you seem to be licking your lips Sir"

Captain Smith "Yes I know all hope is gone but I was having a last grasp Stendel's Tongue to see if I could think of anything"

From HMS Titanic "A pursers tale"

[hibbyfraelibby]

Gaggenpiss - A style of football, not pursued by J.Klopp esq, which is eagerly and entheusiastically lapped up by the fawning beige clad masses despite being the liquid equivalent of dug$#!£€

[Pretty Boy]

Stendeled - Blinded, unable to see the obvious. (They had been starved of attacking football so long they were totally Stendeled to their managers deficiencies).

[jacomo]

Duncan: insignificant individual with bewildering self-confidence. Piles loads of money into the Hearts.

Daniel: insignificant individual with bewildering self-confidence. Takes loads of money out of the Hearts.

[Aldo]

Stendelitus-

https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200217/0ff11a2dd864936ece9cb13e9674ad1e.jpg


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[Deansy]

Gaggenpiss - A style of football, not pursued by J.Klopp esq, which is eagerly and entheusiastically lapped up by the fawning beige clad masses despite being the liquid equivalent of dug$#!£€

Hilariously the Duncans have *******ised the title to the 'Gorgie-press' !

[jacomo]

Hilariously the Duncans have *******ised the title to the 'Gorgie-press' !


‘Over the top’

1. Infamous WWI-era cry of commanding officers as soldiers climbed out of their trenches and attempted a usually futile advance across no man’s land.

2. Battle cry associated with the infamous Gorgie press, as Hearts under Herr Comandant Stendel charge forward in every game in a usually futile quest for points.

[Cat Stanton]

The Yamasauras will be 13 years old in April. When does it move on to its second edition?

[Bostonhibby]

The Yamasauras will be 13 years old in April. When does it move on to its second edition?A Championship years edition might be appropriate?

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[Cat Stanton]

A Championship years edition might be appropriate?

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Let's hope so. Over to the senior (indeed, founding) editor, Mr. Speedway.

[Speedway]

Let's hope so. Over to the senior (indeed, founding) editor, Mr. Speedway.

A concise Yamasaurus of greatest hits as voted for by the good citizens of .net could be in order.

[Hibbyradge]

A concise Yamasaurus of greatest hits as voted for by the good citizens of .net could be in order.

Nah.

It should be like the Encyclopedia Britannica and sold door to door by sincere men and women in expensive clothing with Firmino teeth.

Heavy, leather clad volumes. And very expensive.

[Speedway]

Nah.

It should be like the Encyclopedia Britannica and sold door to door by sincere men and women in expensive clothing and Firmino teeth.

Heavy, leather clad volumes. And very expensive.

Why not both? Got to have product that appeals to every size of purse.

Like the idea of Firminho teeth but.

[BIGK]

Hilariously the Duncans have *******ised the title to the 'Gorgie-press' !

You misunderstand mate, Gorgie-press is actualy German. Roughly translated it means 'hearding cats', quite a good fit if you ask me:agree:

[Jack Hackett]

You misunderstand mate, Gorgie-press is actualy German. Roughly translated it means 'hearding cats', quite a good fit if you ask me:agree:

Well you learn something new everyday :aok:

I thought it was something to do with getting behind their sister in the queue at Aldi

[Smartie]

The Yamasauras will be 13 years old in April. When does it move on to its second edition?

That should probably start when the Sevco (Edinburgh) franchise comes into being after the short and disastrous fanny ownership period.

[Hibbyradge]

Why not both? Got to have product that appeals to every size of purse.

Like the idea of Firminho teeth but.

There's no such thing as Ferrari light.

But, it's your gig so you call the tune.

[Mixu62]

Halkett - a medical term for a monumentally fat posterior.

[JohnMcM]

Leveinfluence - also known as whispered conversations with, and mind-manipulation of players by part-time, semi-retired, late-afternoon appearing Directors of Football, leading to rumoured dressing room splits.

[Smartie]

StenDel Boy - wearing his iconic jacket, this spiv possesses the ability to rip a quite impressive sum of cash out of a bloated mug of a football club off the back of a ropey CV that includes failure at Hannover 96 and Barnsley. The team produced is the yellow Reliant Robin of Scottish Football.

[flash]

Avdijaj (pronounced imposter)- A word used in many different cultures around the world to describe something which arrived to great anticipation and excitement only to turn out to be utter pish. e.g. What an absolute pile of avdijaj that Mrs Brown's Boys box set turned out to be.

[Pretty Boy]

Periera Syndrome - A common condition in which a perceived status leads to heightened expectation about an individuals ability and often leads to disappointment at a later date. (I was so excited about getting Meshino but it turns out I actually had Periera Syndrome)

A Naismith - A mysterious condition in which an individual struggles to make work for several days at a time, remarkably recovers when an exciting opportunity arises then suffers the same affliction upon returning to normality. Scientific debate as to whether the condition is physiological, mental or simply due to a desire to malinger. (He's never here on a Friday or Monday but always seems to manage a pint at the weekend, he's totally pulling Naismiths on the regular).

[jacomo]

Avdijaj (pronounced imposter)- A word used in many different cultures around the world to describe something which arrived to great anticipation and excitement only to turn out to be utter pish. e.g. What an absolute pile of avdijaj that Mrs Brown's Boys box set turned out to be.


Thanks. I thought this was pronounced ‘Panic Signing’ but glad to be corrected. Every day is a school day.

[flash]

Thanks. I thought this was pronounced ‘Panic Signing’ but glad to be corrected. Every day is a school day.

It's panic signing in some languages.

[Sudds_1]

Foulkesis....form of urinary incontinence.

[Northernhibee]

Levein your scraps to one side; the bits of jacket potato skin, burnt bits and overcooked broccoli that you leave out for your former boss to finish, offering him just enough nutrition and sustenance to last the winter months.

[heid the baw]

Kiddmarks - Odourous brown lines left on a Dens Park lavvie pan whilst Sir Albert bangs in a late brace of goals. Circa 1986

[hibbyfraelibby]

Maroon...a rocket, normally (self) set off in distress, which combusts and explodes regularly at 2-0 down after 20 minutes of play against 10 men.

[Joe6-2]

Gaggenpiss - A style of football, not pursued by J.Klopp esq, which is eagerly and entheusiastically lapped up by the fawning beige clad masses despite being the liquid equivalent of dug$#!£€

😂😂😂

[Joe6-2]

StenDel Boy - wearing his iconic jacket, this spiv possesses the ability to rip a quite impressive sum of cash out of a bloated mug of a football club off the back of a ropey CV that includes failure at Hannover 96 and Barnsley. The team produced is the yellow Reliant Robin of Scottish Football.

👍

[WoreTheGreen]

Banderson- a young lad who still lives with his mum but enjoys his own company and baby oil

[Hibs4185]

Gaggenpiss - A style of football, not pursued by J.Klopp esq, which is eagerly and entheusiastically lapped up by the fawning beige clad masses despite being the liquid equivalent of dug$#!£€

Geggenpished- The style of football known as gegenpressing and implemented by famous managers such as J Klopp. Gegenpished is the attempt of gegenpressing by clueless drunk Germans.

[Speedway]

'Yamissed Yamateur'

Words spoken by Lithuanian helmets who believe in winding up their star striker and then posting it for the world to see.

Observe:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rS0rf8F40hM

[jacomo]

TikTok

A social media platform favoured by teenagers and pre-teens.

TICK TOCK

A persistent sound last heard emanating loudly from the Gorgie area of Edinburgh around 6 years ago. New reports suggest that it has returned in the last month.

[Eyrie]

Budge (n) - the diplomatic art of persuading others that they should sacrifice themselves for your benefit. Particularly useful when requesting wage cuts and league reconstructions.

[hibbyfraelibby]

Clause 12 - a ruddy great stick waved by a rapidly degenerating high risk pensioner at the height of the COVID-19 pandemic. Widely seen as ineffective in bullying players into accepting swinging wage cuts mainly due to most of them having a relegation release clause in their contract which will be activated within 38 days if not sooner

[Mixu62]

Relegation - A thing that is only meant to happen to other teams. If ever threatened by Relegation, the "famous" will immediately lobby for "reconstruction".

Reconstruction - see Relegation. A process designed to ensure maximum "sporting integrity". See sporting integrity.

Sporting Integrity - Whatever the "famous" decide it is from one minute to the next.

[Phil MaGlass]

Kiddmarks - Odourous brown lines left on a Dens Park lavvie pan whilst Sir Albert bangs in a late brace of goals. Circa 1986

Kiddmarks 😂😂

[Bobo]

Low Budget - Substandard due to lack of financial integrity and mis-appropriation of allotted funds, an inferior imitation bereft of quality and class.

[TObeachesHibby]

YAm must be joking !

Typical initial statement from all 400,000 Hearts fans worldwide , that their well respected sporting institution (who single handed won WW1), is now being deprived of their God given place in the SPL. :rolleyes:
Note : this is only the initial statement . Further statements from club & fans alike quickly reverts to the use of legal threats and "industrial" language. :greengrin

[Wakeyhibee]

Covidised Yamnesia - A mental block on certain words or a refusal to accept an outcome. The sufferer will be in denial and use many alternative phrases to express the same thing, usually themed with victimisation.

[Hibs4185]

Expelled- another form of relegation. Relegation occurs after finishing bottom after 1 season. Being expelled is a result of being dug*hite for 18 months.

[hibbyfraelibby]

Championship - Where "famous" teams ply their trade

[jacomo]

Task Force

AB: I think a working party sounds like it might take some time whereas a task force is meant to imply that we can get things done very quickly. That's my interpretation of it. I asked the SPFL if I could see the objections the last time this [reconstruction] was looked at because I don't want to start with a blank piece of paper. I want to know what the objections were so we can start addressing these objections in case they still apply. I didn't want to get into a situation where we're wasting time. As a consequence of that phone call I was asked if I would join forces with the SPFL, which I opted to do, on the understanding that I was looking for a temporary resolution to a unique situation. I didn't want to get involved in months-long discussions trying to solve a problem that people haven't been able to solve for years.

[Liberal Hibby]

Subhuman rodent

Tautological insult used by antipodean based balcony dwelling Hearts supporters (antipodus yamus podium stultus) which makes supporters of rival clubs realise the individual's lack of vocabulary.

[TRIALIST]

Maroon ejaculation

A high state of emotion in eastern areas based on climax of football season.

[TObeachesHibby]

Maroon Pound
A form of currency with dubious value and legality, similar to bitcoins.
Exchange rate affected by vast amounts of capital expenditure on as yet unfinished stadium and inflated salary payments. :wink:
Currently valued just above the Zimbabwean Dollar (ref 100 Trillion dollar note)
Was heralded in parts of deepest, darkest Gorgie as "The New Gold Standard". :rolleyes:
Has not been counterfeited. :greengrin

[WillowbraeHibby]

Maroon Pound
A form of currency with dubious value and legality, similar to bitcoins.
Exchange rate affected by vast amounts of capital expenditure on as yet unfinished stadium and inflated salary payments. :wink:
Currently valued just above the Zimbabwean Dollar (ref 100 Trillion dollar note)
Was heralded in parts of deepest, darkest Gorgie as "The New Gold Standard". :rolleyes:
Has not been counterfeited. :greengrin


:faf: Brilliant.

[AltheHibby]

For Foulkes sake!

Involuntary exclamation uttered by reasonable folks on seeing the pee er of the realm's latest tweet

[Eyrie]

Save Hearts In Trouble (FoH) - a non-charitable organisation which transfers money from simple football fans to successful businesswomen, millionaire footballers and SPFL lawyers.

[fiolex1]

Stendel Jacket: A somewhat over priced garment which is looks like a bargain but is of poor quality, is usually accompanied by a shoogly peg.
https://www.heartsdirect.co.uk/item/2377/Jackets/STENDEL-JACKET.html

[jacomo]

Stendel Jacket: A somewhat over priced garment which is looks like a bargain but is of poor quality, is usually accompanied by a shoogly peg.
https://www.heartsdirect.co.uk/item/2377/Jackets/STENDEL-JACKET.html


Levein Jacket: ugly, functional styling, but not actually that useful. Suspect stain on bottom hem. Needed when your Stendel jacket falls off shoogly peg and is lost, but you remember you had the Levein in the back of the cupboard all the time.

[fiolex1]

Levein Jacket: ugly, functional styling, but not actually that useful. Suspect stain on bottom hem. Needed when your Stendel jacket falls off shoogly peg and is lost, but you remember you had the Levein in the back of the cupboard all the time.

Like it: :thumbsup:

[Not In The Know]

Expelled- another form of relegation. Relegation occurs after finishing bottom after 1 season. Being expelled is a result of being dug*hite for 18 months.

Expelled - the final flush that clears away a particularly floaty maroon jobby.

[fiolex1]

Bargain bucket: An Anne Budge

[Smartie]

Expulsion - relegation, only viewed through the bitter, tear-filled eyes of a furious moron with with 6 fingers on each of their hands.

[fiolex1]

Doing a Craig Levein: Similar to a good old fart that lingers and won’t go away no matter what you do.

[Topographic Hibby]

Levein Jacket: ugly, functional styling, but not actually that useful. Suspect stain on bottom hem. Needed when your Stendel jacket falls off shoogly peg and is lost, but you remember you had the Levein in the back of the cupboard all the time.Cathro Jacket: for the younger Yam, with aspirations of Match Secretary at the local Golf Club. No longer to be found at the back of the cupboard under the Stendel Jacket or the Levein jacket, as the Cathro Jacket was "expelled" from employment. Now doing rather well for itself, perhaps indicating that the Levein Jacket was the problem all the time.

[fiolex1]

Down mammary Lane: reminiscing about a couple of tits ( Levein and Plug)

[007]

Stendel Jacket: A somewhat over priced garment which is looks like a bargain but is of poor quality, is usually accompanied by a shoogly peg.
https://www.heartsdirect.co.uk/item/2377/Jackets/STENDEL-JACKET.html

And it only gets used from December to March.

[jacomo]

Budged It

Contemporary equivalent of Heartsed it. See Dens Park, May 1986. An uncanny ability to turn a strong position into a pile of poo.

[JohnM1875]

Expulsion - relegation, only viewed through the bitter, tear-filled eyes of a furious moron with with 6 fingers on each of their hands.

😂 Superb.

[HibbiesandtheBaddies]

Expelled - the final flush that clears away a particularly floaty maroon jobby.

:greengrin

[Jim44]

Oxymaroon - a figure of speech which uses contradictory terms or logic for effect and only makes sense to angry thick Jambos.

[Hibs4185]

Maroon crunch- a global recession worse than the credit crunch, due to the witholding of the maroon pound. Maroon pounds (MP) are currently trading at 1,000,000 MP’s per £1 sterling.

[Speedway]

Yambulated

The state of many a maroon moron on hearing the result of the reconstruction vote.

[Speedway]

Yamortized

The writing down of the book value of the Tynecastle squad in this year’s accounts.

[Speedway]

‘Your Yampleness’

Royal title of Queen Anne when viewed from any angle.

[Speedway]

‘Yamputated’

Name given to the removal of options that Hearts have to escape relegation.

[Speedway]

Yamazon Prime

Express delivery service used to ensure the rapid delivery of tissues to the residents of Gorgie since lunchtime today.

[Dashing Bob S]

Triple relegation. When you mess up three times over one issue. “My girlfriend packed me in because I was lazy and incompetent, my boss sacked me for the same reasons, and my tennis club tore up my membership card - all in the space of a few weeks. Talk about a triple relegation!

[AltheHibby]

Yamazon Prime

Express delivery service used to ensure the rapid delivery of tissues to the residents of Gorgie since lunchtime today.

TBF, I think some of us (including Daffy) will have need of that service tonight!:wink:

[hibbyfraelibby]

Yamalangadingdong...what happens on a BBC podcast when they allow Donald Findlay the opportunity to take English and Levein apart in plain hearing

[TObeachesHibby]

"Cruel and Unusual Punishment" : The legal term used by H#@*ts for being relegated multiple times in the one season due to the results of multiple democratic votes as per the articles of the Scottish Football League. Refer to the "It's no fair" exclusion clause. :greengrin:agree::na na:

[jacomo]

Democracy - a one member, one vote system in which the majority agree to do what Hearts want

North Korea - a one member, one vote system in which the majority disagree with Hearts

[Eyrie]

Yamnesty international - organisation campaigning on behalf of the self-important, self-entitled, patronising, incompetent, anti-democratic and relegated.

[Logie Green]

Yampax. A mechanism designed to stem unwelcome outgoings on a monthly basis such as inflated salaries, payments for an unfinished, overpriced stand and forthcoming legal bills.

[O'Rourke3]

Yampax. A mechanism designed to stem unwelcome outgoings on a monthly basis such as inflated salaries, payments for an unfinished, overpriced stand and forthcoming legal bills.[emoji1787]

Sent from my SM-T580 using Tapatalk

[hibbyfraelibby]

Yamjar...what a speckie wee future launderer uses to try and catch hi bees in but lands up getting stung for millions instead.

[Kato]

"Fersing" -- fear induced by a group of small angry erses who are angry at something imagined.

[TObeachesHibby]

"Dr Budge & Tom English NO FAIR probability Hypothesis"
When League/SPL/SPFL,SFA Rules are set and agreed upon in advance resulting in disadvantageous final position to Scotland's "Big Team" . The rules are then reviewed through committee and democratic voting procedures thus revising the rules for future seasons. The outcome is the same , a "NO FAIR" result which leads to further review though the courts and arbitration . This approach is best explained by mathematical game theory "noughts & crosses" , the more you play/complain the more the result is the same .... a zero sum game .:rolleyes:

examples...
1964-65 season Kilmarnock win 1st Divsion title over Hearts by having 0.042 better goal average :greengrin
Rules then changed to goal difference

1985-86 Celtic win Premier League over Hearts by having +3 better goal difference :agree:

Covid pandemic :goal average used to determine league positions
2019-2020 Hearts finish bottom of league on goal average ....and number of points :wink:

[Speedway]

Yamnesty international - organisation campaigning on behalf of the self-important, self-entitled, patronising, incompetent, anti-democratic and relegated.


Yampax. A mechanism designed to stem unwelcome outgoings on a monthly basis such as inflated salaries, payments for an unfinished, overpriced stand and forthcoming legal bills.

:greengrin Fantastic!

Yampensation

Like compensation only you don't receive any money and end up actually having to pay damages to the accused instead.

[Cat Stanton]

Yamillion.

Prime(ly amusing) number used in the obscure science of Yamathematics and which, when multiplied by eight, equals zero. Or, sometimes, less than zero.

[Cat Stanton]

Yamathematics

See above.

[jacomo]

Yamortized

The writing down of the book value of the Tynecastle squad in this year’s accounts.


Also yamoritized by this season’s events: Hearts’ dignity, reputation and self-respect.

[Dibben]

Documenyamy - insight into how not to run a football club!

[AltheHibby]

British BC- a broadcaster which allows an Irishman named English to Welch on his impartiality in order to inquestioningly support a Scottish "football" team.

[hibbyfraelibby]

The Yampionship - where Premiership sides get downwardly promoted

[Kato]

Excluded - finishing a league season with the least points and being relegated to a lower division.

Sent from my SM-A405FN using Tapatalk

[FilipinoHibs]

Yamchamber- a place where ludicrous ideas and fantasy fake news are circulated to believers who are insulated from the real world. AKA as KickBack.

[Man Down Under]

Yampion's League. A league of establishment clubs who are against the establishment.

Sent from my SM-A205GN using Tapatalk

[delbert]

Yamstrung - what happens to massively overspending teams who find themselves expelled into a lower league, whilst still having to pay the inflated salaries of the donkeys who’ve taken them there in the first place !

[Hibs4185]

Yampensation consisting of Yam-millions- 7 figure compensation claims £0,000,000.

[A Hi-Bee]

Yam-poond = dirty maroon coloured currency only used by around 400,000 of the worlds population practically worthless and very difficult to get rid of.
:greengrin:greengrin:greengrin:greengrin:greengrin :greengrin:greengrin

[Jim44]

Yamcott. - A fortnightly, ‘cut your nose off to spite you face’, sacrificial ritual down Georgie way when 400,000 Jambos, assemble at the PBS to swear allegiance to their heroes, and throw away twenty quid ( the more stupid ones) for the privilege.

[Alfiembra]

Yambling


A sad addiction also known as FoH where as many as 400,000 regularly waste their hard earned maroon pounds by donation to a nasty institution that only deals in disappointment

[Hibs1969]

Yamburger - fatty, greasy, unsatisfactory fast food exclusively available from the soon to be opened Castle View Suite on matchdays (i.e. October onwards). October 2022 that is.

[Northernhibee]

Judge Yamder

A self appointed legal expert who wasn't listening to your three hour long rant about how unfair it is that decisions haven't gone your way and how you're going to sue the SFA for £8m and bring down all of Scottish Football, but to save face will just go "Yep, good idea, I think you should do that" before returning themselves to their game of Angry Birds.

[Rory]

Cattyyampus

A club in dissaray.

Relegation from the big league left the big team cattyyampus.

[KDY Hibs]

Yambling


A sad addiction also known as FoH where as many as 400,000 regularly waste their hard earned maroon pounds by donation to a nasty institution that only deals in disappointment

Brilliant!

[hibbyfraelibby]

Yamaha - Japanese motor bike that went down the road at 125mph,

Yamamoto - Japanese Admiral who went down in the Pacific in 1943

Yambo - whose team had a Japanese player on loan but still went down 4 times in 2020.

[Hibiza]

Yamjar...what a speckie wee future launderer uses to try and catch hi bees in but lands up getting stung for millions instead.

Brill

[Hillsidehibby]

Yambling. What jambos do on a Saturday when the big boys are playing football

[Hillsidehibby]

Yambling. What jambos do on a Saturday when the big boys are playing football

[ArmadaleHibs]

Yampacked. Announcing a full stadium even though there’s 1000s of empty seats. An over exaggeration of a sort

[Hibiza]

Yamayamrama : a female pop group , featuring " Budgie " as lead singer ,with Craig and Austin as back ups.

[Rory]

Yam packed

The result of fitting 400,000 fans into 20,099 capacity ground.

[CropleyWasGod]

Has Steve McYamayam been mentioned? A pundit who has a tendency to ramble incoherently. Tends to speak in Tominglish.

[Aldo]

Yam packed

The result of fitting 400,000 fans into 19,850 capacity ground.

Fixed the capacity for you!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Logie Green]

Yamp-up

To increase the frequency of training sessions once lower division clubs are granted permission. This will compensate for the cancelled sessions caused by top division clubs being unable to adhere to Covid 19 rules. These additional sessions will help the team prepare for visits to the ‘difficult places to go’ such as Arbroath, Alloa etc.

[Aldo]

Yam-Believe - imagining things are real when indeed they are not. ie pretending they own the Oriam when indeed they don’t.


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[Eyrie]

Yamish Soap Bar - official stain remover of the SPFL. Excellent at removing embarrassing skid marks at the bottom of the table and leaving you with a fresh clean league.

[007]

Hambo - A squealing Jambo 🐷 e.g. Leslie Deans.

[007]

Gorgon - an inhabitant of Gorgie

https://i.ibb.co/gVB2zJ1/gorgon-perachora-Athens-dj-24082014-2-0341c.jpg (https://ibb.co/k1W7QXn)

Gorgon Zola - Barrie McKay

[AltheHibby]

Gorgon - an inhabitant of Gorgie

https://i.ibb.co/gVB2zJ1/gorgon-perachora-Athens-dj-24082014-2-0341c.jpg (https://ibb.co/k1W7QXn)

Gorgon Zola - Barrie McKay

Cheesiest post yet.

[Tricla]

Gorgon - an inhabitant of Gorgie

https://i.ibb.co/gVB2zJ1/gorgon-perachora-Athens-dj-24082014-2-0341c.jpg (https://ibb.co/k1W7QXn)

Gorgon Zola - Barrie McKay

:faf:

[007]

The Maroon Mile - Stretch of road in Gorgie and Darly with an unpaid creditor every 10 yards.

[Viva_Palmeiras]

“Blood doesn’t show on a maroon shirt.” Oft used quote used by the Gorgie faithful of unclear origins.
Passive aggressive undertones or profound statement ? Turns out itwas a throwaway comment by
Nanette Newman on a Fairy ad.

[HoboHarry]

“Blood doesn’t show on a maroon shirt.” Oft used quote used by the Gorgie faithful of unclear origins.
Passive aggressive undertones or profound statement ? Turns out itwas a throwaway comment by
Nanette Newman on a Fairy ad.
There isn't a washing detergent on the planet that's up to the task of making a maroon shirt look clean. What a horrible colour, whoever came up with that idea for a football jersey must have been royally blootered.

[hibees 7062]

There isn't a washing detergent on the planet that's up to the task of making a maroon shirt look clean. What a horrible colour, whoever came up with that idea for a football jersey must have been royally blootered.

Or should be royally blootered

[Northernhibee]

Travelbodge- a top class five star hotel with no windows and defo no windows. Perfect for a getaway with your cousin.

[Jones28]

Travelbodge- a top class five star hotel with no windows and defo no windows. Perfect for a getaway with your cousin.

:thumbsup:

See also: Pryamier Inn

[Viva_Palmeiras]

Primarking - often mistaken as an innovative defensive tactic - mainly dark arts and clogging - but in fact where the beautiful people with Hearts leanings go to shop.

[wookie70]

Natural* Light - The ambient light coming from a TV set

[VoltaireHibs]

Primarking - often mistaken as an innovative defensive tactic - mainly dark arts and clogging - but in fact where the beautiful people with Hearts leanings go to shop.

Ho! Nothing wrong with a wee bit of the basics from Primani, cheeky get. 😉

[linlithgowhibbie]

Primarking - often mistaken as an innovative defensive tactic - mainly dark arts and clogging - but in fact where the beautiful people with Hearts leanings go to shop.

Phew, had to re=read that, thought you said dark arts and dogging!:greengrin

[Viva_Palmeiras]

Phew, had to re=read that, thought you said dark arts and dogging!:greengrin

they get up to all sorts!

[Viva_Palmeiras]

Phew, had to re=read that, thought you said dark arts and dogging!:greengrin

they get up to all sorts!

[Hibs4185]

Nouview - a new type of dining experience Similar to nouveau but in a restaurant with no views and a bedroom with no windows and no view.

Nouview is only available to rover driver’s, bowling club committee members, pishy stained trouser wearers or windae lickers.

[Hibbyradge]

Nouview is only available to rover driver’s, bowling club committee members, pishy stained trouser wearers or windae lickers.

More often than not, this is one and the same person.

[Joe6-2]

Or should be royally blootered

😂😂

[Northernhibee]

The Shankland Tax - When Lawrence Shankland goes to a £20 per head all you can eat buffet, he has to pay £30. That extra tenner is the Shankland Tax