LustForLeith
13-11-2022, 01:34 PM
Great wee article in the latest Mundial newsletter about Newcastle cult hero Tino Asprilla. Some great stories, not sure if the one of him dressed as a dinosaur on a football playing horse is true but I wouldn’t rule it out. Once heard he went awol over Christmas and Newcastle sent someone to find him. They apparently found him in a bit of a state in Columbia reluctant to go back to Newcastle.
It got me thinking of other ‘eccentric’ characters in the game over the years. Recently Ballotelli broke the mould. We could do with more folk like them
Here’s the article -
I get free South American steak and chips at Waterloo Food Market because the chef and I share a love of Faustino Hernán Asprilla Hinestroza. That’s Colombian Spanish for the Geordie word, ‘Tiiinooo’, which itself has roots in the Old English saying, ‘Tino Asprilla was as mad as *****.’
There’s plenty to love. Here’s a list of phrases to type into Google that will significantly improve your day:
‘Tino Asprilla snubs Darlington rent-free bungalow’
‘Tino Asprilla in T-Rex costume on horseback kicking ball’
‘Tino Asprilla flavoured condom range’
‘Tino Asprilla kicks bus’
Before you do that, though, know that Tino’s career can be summed up by the last ten minutes of Newcastle’s UEFA Cup 3rd round victory over FC Metz at St. James’ Park on the 3rd December 1996. It’s why I love football.
A Metz team featuring Robert Pirès and Rigobert Song had held the Toon to a 1–1 draw at their place in the first leg. With eighty minutes on the clock, you could cut the atmosphere in St. James’ with baking soda and still catch a glimpse of the devil. Cue Tino:
80’: A cross comes flying into the Metz box. There’s chaos. Tino thrives in chaos. Darren Peacock chests the ball down with the ease you’d expect from a man of the ponytail, smashes it across goal, and Tino glances a header into the far corner.
81’: The tension lifts, and Tino sees fit to remove his shirt, hoist it onto the corner flag and wave it at the Toon Army. He’s given a yellow card for flagrant heroism.
82’: Pav Srníček launches a ball upfield. Tino brings it down with a first touch from Planet Zidane, takes the last defender out of the game by just running past him, then chips the onrushing goalkeeper with the outside of his right foot. Cartwheels and fist pumps.
86’: Tino attempts an audacious back-heel in an attempt to set up Alan Shearer, and... he’s done. Muscle’s gone.
89’: Stretchered off with his head in his hands.
And that’s Tino. Short bursts of complete anarchy that take you a full evening to comprehend and a lifetime to recover from.
It got me thinking of other ‘eccentric’ characters in the game over the years. Recently Ballotelli broke the mould. We could do with more folk like them
Here’s the article -
I get free South American steak and chips at Waterloo Food Market because the chef and I share a love of Faustino Hernán Asprilla Hinestroza. That’s Colombian Spanish for the Geordie word, ‘Tiiinooo’, which itself has roots in the Old English saying, ‘Tino Asprilla was as mad as *****.’
There’s plenty to love. Here’s a list of phrases to type into Google that will significantly improve your day:
‘Tino Asprilla snubs Darlington rent-free bungalow’
‘Tino Asprilla in T-Rex costume on horseback kicking ball’
‘Tino Asprilla flavoured condom range’
‘Tino Asprilla kicks bus’
Before you do that, though, know that Tino’s career can be summed up by the last ten minutes of Newcastle’s UEFA Cup 3rd round victory over FC Metz at St. James’ Park on the 3rd December 1996. It’s why I love football.
A Metz team featuring Robert Pirès and Rigobert Song had held the Toon to a 1–1 draw at their place in the first leg. With eighty minutes on the clock, you could cut the atmosphere in St. James’ with baking soda and still catch a glimpse of the devil. Cue Tino:
80’: A cross comes flying into the Metz box. There’s chaos. Tino thrives in chaos. Darren Peacock chests the ball down with the ease you’d expect from a man of the ponytail, smashes it across goal, and Tino glances a header into the far corner.
81’: The tension lifts, and Tino sees fit to remove his shirt, hoist it onto the corner flag and wave it at the Toon Army. He’s given a yellow card for flagrant heroism.
82’: Pav Srníček launches a ball upfield. Tino brings it down with a first touch from Planet Zidane, takes the last defender out of the game by just running past him, then chips the onrushing goalkeeper with the outside of his right foot. Cartwheels and fist pumps.
86’: Tino attempts an audacious back-heel in an attempt to set up Alan Shearer, and... he’s done. Muscle’s gone.
89’: Stretchered off with his head in his hands.
And that’s Tino. Short bursts of complete anarchy that take you a full evening to comprehend and a lifetime to recover from.