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theonlywayisup
03-02-2018, 12:23 PM
"You get the fans that come in and pay their money, they say what they want and then they go home and forget about it and I'm the one that it affects. It bothers me for the rest of the weekend. It gets me in a bad place again."


http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-42901550

We've heard it. "XYZ you're a ******* disgrace" "die you *******", "your wife's being ******* by a XYZ" etc etc.

But is it right?

Is there any other profession where you go to work and one or many spend the whole time you are at work shouting abuse at you?

Discuss!!

My_Wife_Camille
03-02-2018, 12:26 PM
Police, waiters and call centre staff have to put up with it regularly without having thousands of others singing their praises or having luxury of being paid ‘footballers wages’.

hibsbollah
03-02-2018, 12:27 PM
You've got cause and effect the wrong way round. It's not 'depression caused by taunts', it's more like 'man mocked for having illness'. Although there are some on here who think we've all become 'snowflakes' and 'enjoy being offended' by this sort of thing :rolleyes:

Diclonius
03-02-2018, 12:30 PM
You've got cause and effect the wrong way round. It's not 'depression caused by taunts', it's more like 'man mocked for having illness'. Although there are some on here who think we've all become 'snowflakes' and 'enjoy being offended' by this sort of thing :rolleyes:

Nail on head.

Cause of free speech I can be as much of a dick as I want to you and if you react it's PC gone mad. What a joke.

MWHIBBIES
03-02-2018, 12:30 PM
Police, waiters and call centre staff have to put up with it regularly without having thousands of others singing their praises or having luxury of being paid ‘footballers wages’.

Being paid well doesn't mean you don't have feelings or problems.

heidtheba
03-02-2018, 12:32 PM
Ok I'll have a pop and an admission. I get crushed by the small nippy (usually not-meant) remarks that I get in my job, from my colleagues each and every day. Really. I suffer from a chronic illness and a side effect when I'm in a cluster is depression. I over think, over analyse and it hurts. No way could I deal with the things these players go through. Then I go through the 'well you shouldn't listen to them' self-talk which just means it's my fault even more.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
I get what they say. No pay can take that away. Yes some are paid an obscene amount but I think it will still affect them.
I'm not going to judge. I might very well be weak but I know how much it has impacted on my own life.
If we, as fans, think that we should cheer the team on then we're accepting that it has an impact positively. It can also have an impact negatively. Ying and Yang.

Hibbyradge
03-02-2018, 12:37 PM
Ok I'll have a pop and an admission. I get crushed by the small nippy (usually not-meant) remarks that I get in my job, from my colleagues each and every day. Really. I suffer from a chronic illness and a side effect when I'm in a cluster is depression. I over think, over analyse and it hurts. No way could I deal with the things these players go through. Then I go through the 'well you shouldn't listen to them' self-talk which just means it's my fault even more.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
I get what they say. No pay can take that away. Yes some are paid an obscene amount but I think it will still affect them.
I'm not going to judge. I might very well be weak but I know how much it has impacted on my own life.
If we, as fans, think that we should cheer the team on then we're accepting that it has an impact positively. It can also have an impact negatively. Ying and Yang.

Great post.

The last thing you are, is weak.

SRHibs
03-02-2018, 12:37 PM
I can tell you if I had chants like “so ****ing ugly” aimed at me, I’d likely never want to play again. I find it funny that everyone is OK with that though.

jonty
03-02-2018, 12:39 PM
Police, waiters and call centre staff have to put up with it regularly without having thousands of others singing their praises or having luxury of being paid ‘footballers wages’.

True, but if they were to speak out, its not likely to be news. Just because we don't hear about it doesn't mean people are suffering.

That said, it helps to have a thick skin and treat the abuse for what it is - pointless name calling with the aim of getting a reaction.

heidtheba
03-02-2018, 12:50 PM
Great post.

The last thing you are, is weak.


Thanks HR that's very much appreciated.

Hibrandenburg
03-02-2018, 01:00 PM
Nail on head.

Cause of free speech I can be as much of a dick as I want to you and if you react it's PC gone mad. What a joke.

:agree:

If you believe in free speech and the right to offend then you also need to accept a free smack in the puss when you do it to someone with a belief in free thinking reprisal.

hibsbollah
03-02-2018, 01:02 PM
Nail on head.

Cause of free speech I can be as much of a dick as I want to you and if you react it's PC gone mad. What a joke.

Youve just perfectly described this so-called 'alt-right' movement.

Hibrandenburg
03-02-2018, 01:09 PM
Ok I'll have a pop and an admission. I get crushed by the small nippy (usually not-meant) remarks that I get in my job, from my colleagues each and every day. Really. I suffer from a chronic illness and a side effect when I'm in a cluster is depression. I over think, over analyse and it hurts. No way could I deal with the things these players go through. Then I go through the 'well you shouldn't listen to them' self-talk which just means it's my fault even more.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
I get what they say. No pay can take that away. Yes some are paid an obscene amount but I think it will still affect them.
I'm not going to judge. I might very well be weak but I know how much it has impacted on my own life.
If we, as fans, think that we should cheer the team on then we're accepting that it has an impact positively. It can also have an impact negatively. Ying and Yang.

I despair that some adults on an empathy awareness level never develop beyond the school yard stage.

Roxyhibee
03-02-2018, 01:27 PM
Ok I'll have a pop and an admission. I get crushed by the small nippy (usually not-meant) remarks that I get in my job, from my colleagues each and every day. Really. I suffer from a chronic illness and a side effect when I'm in a cluster is depression. I over think, over analyse and it hurts. No way could I deal with the things these players go through. Then I go through the 'well you shouldn't listen to them' self-talk which just means it's my fault even more.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
I get what they say. No pay can take that away. Yes some are paid an obscene amount but I think it will still affect them.
I'm not going to judge. I might very well be weak but I know how much it has impacted on my own life.
If we, as fans, think that we should cheer the team on then we're accepting that it has an impact positively. It can also have an impact negatively. Ying and Yang.

I hope you know that coming on this forum and putting such an open and honest personal viewpoint means that you are addressing your issues in a hugely positive way and the 'nippers' at your workplace are still hiding within their own fears which they may never address.

Very impressve post.

Eesti
03-02-2018, 01:34 PM
I hope you know that coming on this forum and putting such an open and honest personal viewpoint means that you are addressing your issues in a hugely positive way and the 'nippers' at your workplace are still hiding within their own fears which they may never address.

Very impressve post.


:agree:

james62
03-02-2018, 01:40 PM
Police, waiters and call centre staff have to put up with it regularly without having thousands of others singing their praises or having luxury of being paid ‘footballers wages’.

To be this guy plays for Cowdenbeath so he probably doesn't have either. I agree though that these things happen in all walks of life without the same media attention.

Hibby70
03-02-2018, 01:47 PM
Withe the exception of Gomez at Meadowbank I don't think I've ever been at a sporting event where the opposition (and sometime own team) gets subjected to so much taunting from fans.

Is football pretty much unique with this attitude?

Spike Mandela
03-02-2018, 01:48 PM
I think an overlooked attribute in top players these days is the possession of a ‘thick skin’ or a strong mentality.

The abuse and criticism from not only fans but team mates, management and media make it very difficult, for some people who take criticism or abuse to heart, to deal with.

We have all heard the abuse at games, a lot of it beyond the pale, and it must clearly affect people who are low on confidence, thin skinned or indeed suffering from mental disorders.

I would go as far to say we have lost some very talented individuals from the game due to this factor.

heidtheba
03-02-2018, 01:53 PM
Thank you everyone for your very supportive comments. This isn't a thread about me but I'll add another thing into the mix which might be very relevant for footballers.
They may well be on a very heavy dose of painkilling medication at times. I know that I was on 23 pills a day at one point for my condition. Fortunately that was only for six months, but i'm still on a lot at times. One thing that became very apparent was that the medication for one thing often caused problems in other areas. Anti-depressants can cause weight gain, some pain killers can cause anxiety and others can cause a myriad of other issues. They can even interact badly with each other (always see a pharmacist for advice on this one - I didn't know that at the time).
In other words, a lot of the times,some players may actually have the required 'thick skin' but won't be able to show it because of the chemical imbalances in their body, due to painkillers, which increase their likelihood of taking things to heart. The medication may be in control - not them. Add in the fact that the notable players may well still get abuse on the street when they are recovering from injury and, well, it makes life very tough.

seanoheimhin
03-02-2018, 01:57 PM
Ok I'll have a pop and an admission. I get crushed by the small nippy (usually not-meant) remarks that I get in my job, from my colleagues each and every day. Really. I suffer from a chronic illness and a side effect when I'm in a cluster is depression. I over think, over analyse and it hurts. No way could I deal with the things these players go through. Then I go through the 'well you shouldn't listen to them' self-talk which just means it's my fault even more.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
I get what they say. No pay can take that away. Yes some are paid an obscene amount but I think it will still affect them.
I'm not going to judge. I might very well be weak but I know how much it has impacted on my own life.
If we, as fans, think that we should cheer the team on then we're accepting that it has an impact positively. It can also have an impact negatively. Ying and Yang.

Thanks for sharing, raises a lot of good points. We suspend our own humanity in a lot of these cases. Free speech is one thing, but why you would want to say those things to real people out there giving it their best (even if they are pricks) in the first place, I just don’t know.

My_Wife_Camille
03-02-2018, 01:58 PM
Being paid well does mean you dont have feelings or problems.
This is true. Well said

One Day Soon
03-02-2018, 01:58 PM
One of the reasons - just one - that I am a very vocal supporter of Neil Lennon is because of his willingness to talk about depression and not let it by swept under the carpet. The more this sort of thing is discussed openly and abuse of it is confronted the better.

It does raise a wider issue for me though - the right to think and speak what you like versus the rights of people not to be abused, victimised, offended or discriminated against.

The Holocaust is an interesting case in point. There are people who believe and argue that it didn't happen. Should these dangerous idiots be allowed to express their views or should they be prosecuted for doing so? What about where the state decides what people can and cannot think or say? Here's a case in point from today: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-42920934


(http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-42920934)

Hibrandenburg
03-02-2018, 04:29 PM
One of the reasons - just one - that I am a very vocal supporter of Neil Lennon is because of his willingness to talk about depression and not let it by swept under the carpet. The more this sort of thing is discussed openly and abuse of it is confronted the better.

It does raise a wider issue for me though - the right to think and speak what you like versus the rights of people not to be abused, victimised, offended or discriminated against.

The Holocaust is an interesting case in point. There are people who believe and argue that it didn't happen. Should these dangerous idiots be allowed to express their views or should they be prosecuted for doing so? What about where the state decides what people can and cannot think or say? Here's a case in point from today: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-42920934


(http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-42920934)

Ref the Holocaust no. People are entitled to their own opinion but not their own facts. Opinion is subjective, facts aren't and anyone basing an opinion on false facts needs correcting.

--------
03-02-2018, 05:50 PM
Ok I'll have a pop and an admission. I get crushed by the small nippy (usually not-meant) remarks that I get in my job, from my colleagues each and every day. Really. I suffer from a chronic illness and a side effect when I'm in a cluster is depression. I over think, over analyse and it hurts. No way could I deal with the things these players go through. Then I go through the 'well you shouldn't listen to them' self-talk which just means it's my fault even more.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
I get what they say. No pay can take that away. Yes some are paid an obscene amount but I think it will still affect them.
I'm not going to judge. I might very well be weak but I know how much it has impacted on my own life.
If we, as fans, think that we should cheer the team on then we're accepting that it has an impact positively. It can also have an impact negatively. Ying and Yang.

Nice one, man. :top marks



Ref the Holocaust no. People are entitled to their own opinion but not their own facts. Opinion is subjective, facts aren't and anyone basing an opinion on false facts needs correcting.

Yes. Holocaust deniers aren't expressing a reasonable, thought-out opinion.

They're remaking history by knowingly distorting the truth. The evidence is there, way beyond anything needed for 'beyond reasonable doubt'. There is no doubt that the Holocaust took place; those who deny it are those who would like to repeat it.

And they're supported by those who have no interest in truth or falsehood - only their own festering prejudice and hatred.

CathroMustStay
03-02-2018, 05:51 PM
Understanding of depression, and mental health in general, still has a lot way to go before the stigmatisation ends.

Thecat23
03-02-2018, 05:59 PM
Ok I'll have a pop and an admission. I get crushed by the small nippy (usually not-meant) remarks that I get in my job, from my colleagues each and every day. Really. I suffer from a chronic illness and a side effect when I'm in a cluster is depression. I over think, over analyse and it hurts. No way could I deal with the things these players go through. Then I go through the 'well you shouldn't listen to them' self-talk which just means it's my fault even more.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
I get what they say. No pay can take that away. Yes some are paid an obscene amount but I think it will still affect them.
I'm not going to judge. I might very well be weak but I know how much it has impacted on my own life.
If we, as fans, think that we should cheer the team on then we're accepting that it has an impact positively. It can also have an impact negatively. Ying and Yang.

Not many would come on and post what you have. Great post and I wish you all the best bud.

Wee Effen Bee
03-02-2018, 06:11 PM
I despair that some adults on an empathy awareness level never develop beyond the school yard stage.

The thing is H, the amount of work put into primary schools in the past few years, has seen an amazing turn around in the attitudes of children. We regularly have parents telling us that their youngsters are correcting their (potentially) racist, homophobic, genderist language at home. They are now openly questioning adults’ use of the ‘mong’ word and many others. Here’s to the power of the wee yins!😀

Hibrandenburg
03-02-2018, 06:48 PM
The thing is H, the amount of work put into primary schools in the past few years, has seen an amazing turn around in the attitudes of children. We regularly have parents telling us that their youngsters are correcting their (potentially) racist, homophobic, genderist language at home. They are now openly questioning adults’ use of the ‘mong’ word and many others. Here’s to the power of the wee yins!😀

That's great to hear. There might still be hope for the future. :thumbsup:

Fritz
03-02-2018, 07:05 PM
Police, waiters and call centre staff have to put up with it regularly without having thousands of others singing their praises or having luxury of being paid ‘footballers wages’.

Police, waiters and call centre staff regularly put up with abuse relating to their own specific mental health issues?