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R11Loaded
08-01-2015, 11:28 PM
Hearts have signed this striker on loan till the end of the season http://tapatalk.imageshack.com/v2/15/01/08/edabdf7f7b3b80b090999dc62a6d1504.jpg


Class doesn't show on a maroon jersey

Capt Mainwaring
08-01-2015, 11:32 PM
You'll rarely see a more appropriate Sponsors Logo!

Sir David Gray
08-01-2015, 11:32 PM
Hearts have signed this striker on loan till the end of the season http://tapatalk.imageshack.com/v2/15/01/08/edabdf7f7b3b80b090999dc62a6d1504.jpg


Class doesn't show on a maroon jersey

Does this guy know that just because KFC sponsors his team's kit, he doesn't need to eat in there four times a week as well? :confused:

R11Loaded
08-01-2015, 11:32 PM
Where does he eat? He eats at Kfc

KF KF KFC KFC KFC KF KF KFC KF KFC


Class doesn't show on a maroon jersey

Col2
08-01-2015, 11:35 PM
Two points:-

1. The guy if 5'11 and almost 15 stone. I am 6'4 and 15 stone and need to lose some weight (ideally).

It must all be muscle. I bet.

2. Last 48 hours show the extremes between Stubbs and Levein. Stubbs gets a quick, strong but mobile, skillfull striker and Levein gets a lump of lard, target man to hoof long balls up to. It's Levein all over. How many medals Craigy boy??

scuttle
08-01-2015, 11:36 PM
Would quite like that strip he is wearing as an away one for us

Sir David Gray
08-01-2015, 11:39 PM
Having done a search on this guy on Google images, it looks like the KFC logo has been photoshopped.

Pity.

Pete
08-01-2015, 11:39 PM
hoooooof!

poolman
08-01-2015, 11:40 PM
Does this guy know that just because KFC sponsors his team's kit, he doesn't need to eat in there four times a week as well? :confused:


Mair like every day o' the week

Sergey
08-01-2015, 11:44 PM
Decent length of girth.

dchibs
08-01-2015, 11:45 PM
Would quite like that strip he is wearing as an away one for us
That strip has enough materal to do our full team.

Sir David Gray
08-01-2015, 11:49 PM
Mair like every day o' the week

Nah, the other three days of the week are spent in McDonald's. :greengrin

hibs0666
09-01-2015, 01:23 AM
The fat lad is in his ninth season as a pro (eater?).

In this time he has played 156 games (17 games a season average) scoring 34 goals (4 goals a season).

In the last three seasons he has played 42 games scoring 7 goals.

In the last season he has not had a game. From a yam roaster perspective that will mean he is rested. From a warrior poet perspective that will mean he has had plenty opportunity to indulge in a bit of comfort eating. Time will tell...

The_Horde
09-01-2015, 02:56 AM
Looks like someone's taken the weight off walkers sisters pants for the next Derby..

marti1875
09-01-2015, 04:07 AM
I first saw this signing via Facebook so i looked at the comments and here is what a Dutch guy had to say about him, firstly it was this:

"I'm from Holland, but this is a terrible signing. Has been struggling with serious overweight for a couple of seasons, and is not a real goal scorer. Hope that he'll do better than the last seasons in Holland".

Then he replied with this to the dopey yams:

"I hope he will, but I'm not so optimistic. His former club (Groningen) had to hire a personal trainer (former world champion martial arts) to get him in to shape. While in the PSV academy he was a hot prospect, but has never made it anywhere so far. As for the lower level, the eredivisie is known for it's poor defenders (no physical power, no tactical skills just a good technique) The Scottish championship defenders will play a more physical game then he's used to, so it might even be harder in Scottish football as a striker than in the Dutch league".

Make of that what you will.....i know i am pissing myself laughing at it...not exactly a glowing reccomendation :thumbsup::greengrin

Aldo
09-01-2015, 05:26 AM
As I mentioned on a previous thread the lad makes Akinfenwa look anorexic!!!

spike220
09-01-2015, 07:25 AM
Is this for real? or a wind up? He is not a footballer is he??????

lyonhibs
09-01-2015, 08:07 AM
As long as this Jambo fat ******* doesn't score a few goals against us like the previous incumbent of the XXXXXXL shirt at Tynecastle.

Hibee87
09-01-2015, 08:33 AM
Your just a fat Cristian Nade, Fat Christian Nade :singing:

Hibernian Verse
09-01-2015, 09:14 AM
What Zeefuik is that?

Not a footballer anyway

:gwa:

CRAZYHIBBY
09-01-2015, 10:00 AM
Lets leave him alone......Remember what happened the last time we ripped a hearts striker for being fat

Keith_M
09-01-2015, 10:19 AM
Two points:-

1. The guy if 5'11 and almost 15 stone. I am 6'4 and 15 stone and need to lose some weight (ideally).



Is that honestly what he weighs?

I'm the same height as him and consider myself a wee bit overwieght but I'm about 20 lbs lighter

Jeezo!

Jim44
09-01-2015, 10:42 AM
Something wrong with Neilson's keyboard?

Potter: Well Robbie, things are going well, but with all these injuries, I think we should be looking to get a bit of weight in the team upfront. What do you think?

Neilson : A thank you raght. A thank we maght be well advased to anvest an a fat straker tall the end of the season.

Mikey09
09-01-2015, 11:16 AM
As if this isn't funny enough, he's supposed to be a professional athlete FFS!!, my Yam workmates have nicknamed him "G-Unit"!!!! :faf::faf::faf:
Whats the G stand for? Gregg's??'

emerald green
09-01-2015, 11:24 AM
I first saw this signing via Facebook so i looked at the comments and here is what a Dutch guy had to say about him, firstly it was this:

"I'm from Holland, but this is a terrible signing. Has been struggling with serious overweight for a couple of seasons, and is not a real goal scorer. Hope that he'll do better than the last seasons in Holland".

Absolutely brilliant! :faf:

brog
09-01-2015, 11:28 AM
Even the Daily Ranger had a sly wee dig today with their headline, " Hearts beef up their attack"! Classic!

Jones28
09-01-2015, 11:48 AM
Jesus Christ, are they replacing him twice?!

Waxy
09-01-2015, 12:08 PM
It's that striker from the paddypower ad innit? Squirts the can of cream into his cakehole to the tune of hey fatty boomboom

cabbageandribs1875
09-01-2015, 12:22 PM
10 men couldnae carry, couldnae carry Zeefuik



it fits :agree:


unlike his top

:nade:

truehibernian
09-01-2015, 12:37 PM
Oh......my......word........

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zNro7oPJ6zc

This is when his club enlisted the help of a mixed martial arts trainer - I seriously think Buster Douglas and George Foreman (when he came back) were of better 'physique' :faf::faf::faf:

Big_Franck
09-01-2015, 01:28 PM
As someone said above this is definitely a Levein signing. The boy's bigger than Nade FFS.

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southsider
09-01-2015, 01:58 PM
As someone said above this is definitely a Levein signing. The boy's bigger than Nade FFS.

13977
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If that was what he was like whilst "playing",what size is he now?

WillowbraeHibby
09-01-2015, 02:15 PM
Just had a quick look on Yam KB, it appears Zeefuik Googled Hearts, seen they were a "Big Club" (Well, he will fit right in) :greengrin, and it was an easy decision!!!!

:flag::flag::flag: GGTTH

LeithBoozy
09-01-2015, 02:16 PM
I cant see him leaving the centre circle,still he wont lose many 50-50s that's for sure.:greengrin Was his former club Groningen or Warburers.:wink:

WillowbraeHibby
09-01-2015, 02:24 PM
I cant see him leaving the centre circle,still he wont lose many 50-50s that's for sure.:greengrin Was his former club Groningen or Warburers.:wink:

FC Groningen I believe.... (Warburgers.. Hamburgers more like :greengrin)

essexhibee
09-01-2015, 02:25 PM
He's definitely fat over muscle. He has small shoulders for example for someone that would be big and workout.

Another nade!

WillowbraeHibby
09-01-2015, 02:31 PM
He's definitely fat over muscle. He has small shoulders for example for someone that would be big and workout.

Another nade!


Canny see him running aboot much... He says he holds the ball up well, that tells you lots. As you say, another Nade.

hibs0666
09-01-2015, 05:16 PM
Oh......my......word........

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zNro7oPJ6zc

This is when his club enlisted the help of a mixed martial arts trainer - I seriously think Buster Douglas and George Foreman (when he came back) were of better 'physique' :faf::faf::faf:

He's certainly got a lot of full-fatman-foldover action on his neck.

Eyrie
09-01-2015, 07:31 PM
The Yams are missing a trick here. Instead of sticking him up front, they should stick him in goals (assuming he'd fit between the posts) because then there would be no room for the ball to cross the line.

Swedish hibee
09-01-2015, 09:21 PM
http://tapatalk.imageshack.com/v2/15/01/08/edabdf7f7b3b80b090999dc62a6d1504.jpg


Class doesn't show on a maroon jersey

:faf::faf::faf::giruy2:

leggeto
09-01-2015, 09:48 PM
Is this thread a wind up,did they sign that

Brunswickbill
09-01-2015, 09:54 PM
I think I'll buy shares in this place https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@55.93793,-3.232015,3a,75y,30.2h,80.44t/data=!3m4!1e1!3m2!1sZeY30iMUsFWa0bt0h0Nrlw!2e0

Sir David Gray
09-01-2015, 10:00 PM
Is this thread a wind up,did they sign that

Yep.

The only thing which is a wind up is the sponsor on his shirt.

Danderhall Hibs
09-01-2015, 10:30 PM
I'll be backing him to score at any time in the next derby.

Sir David Gray
09-01-2015, 11:08 PM
I'll be backing him to score at any time in the next derby.

:agree: It's almost guaranteed.

I can picture it now

hibees 7062
10-01-2015, 01:29 AM
I wonder if he can score against Hibs whenever he wants like Nade

California-Hibs
10-01-2015, 06:06 AM
I wonder if he can score against Hibs whenever he wants like Nade

Settle down. Nade scored a grand total of 1 against us while playing for Hearts......1. He was pish in 99.9% of derbies, a complete no mark, as this guy also has the makings of being.

Waxy
10-01-2015, 09:20 AM
Maybe hearts have a basketball team we dont know about?

southsider
10-01-2015, 11:18 AM
Settle down. Nade scored a grand total of 1 against us while playing for Hearts......1. He was pish in 99.9% of derbies, a complete no mark, as this guy also has the makings of being.

This new guy makes Nade look like Twiggy !

Big_Franck
10-01-2015, 11:45 AM
Settle down. Nade scored a grand total of 1 against us while playing for Hearts......1. He was pish in 99.9% of derbies, a complete no mark, as this guy also has the makings of being.

I think Nade actually scored against us twice, but I agree with you. He must have played in 10 derbies or more and was brutal in every one of them that I can remember. Hopefully this new boy is just as bad.

jacomo
10-01-2015, 12:15 PM
Levein / Nielson have obviously weighed up their options and decided their squad was a little light up front.

Hearts are heavy favourites for the title.

Etc etc

hibs0666
10-01-2015, 01:55 PM
Heard that the boy has sessions with these guys to improve his physique. (http://www.mya.co.uk/breast-enlargement/)

green day
10-01-2015, 04:12 PM
He just scored

Moon unit
10-01-2015, 04:14 PM
I cant see him leaving the centre circle,still he wont lose many 50-50s that's for sure.:greengrin Was his former club Groningen or Warburers.:wink:

Was it not Warburtons???..........

GlasgowHibee
10-01-2015, 04:19 PM
He's scored again...

Speedy
10-01-2015, 04:20 PM
Another goal.

Pete
10-01-2015, 04:29 PM
He's scored again...

He's still fat and crap.

Thecat23
10-01-2015, 04:36 PM
What's thr reports on him? Are they saying he's any good?

Keith_M
10-01-2015, 04:39 PM
He missed a penalty, he's rubbish!

Pete
10-01-2015, 04:39 PM
What's thr reports on him? Are they saying he's any good?

No reports. He's eaten everyone.

Thecat23
10-01-2015, 04:43 PM
No reports. He's eaten everyone.

[emoji23]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Sir David Gray
10-01-2015, 06:18 PM
Settle down. Nade scored a grand total of 1 against us while playing for Hearts......1. He was pish in 99.9% of derbies, a complete no mark, as this guy also has the makings of being.

He scored twice against us for Hearts.

First one came in November 2007.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/scot_prem/7074125.stm

And the second came in January 2009 in the Scottish Cup.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/scot_cups/7819795.stm

Ronniekirk
10-01-2015, 07:32 PM
Is this thread a wind up,did they sign that
Scored two today,and Tom English on radio saying he has done some research on the guy and thinks Thete is a player in there if he is motivated and can keep his weight down .
So looks like first picture impressions may have been deceptive possibly .

Sir David Gray
10-01-2015, 07:37 PM
Scored two today,and Tom English on radio saying he has done some research on the guy and thinks Thete is a player in there if he is motivated and can keep his weight down .
So looks like first picture impressions may have been deceptive possibly .

Nope I would say the pictures were fairly accurate.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/30663925

Can't argue with two goals on your debut though, I suppose.

Ronniekirk
10-01-2015, 07:47 PM
Nope I would say the pictures were fairly accurate.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/30663925

Can't argue with two goals on your debut though, I suppose.
Geeze oh ,looks like an unfit Tonga Rugby Player ,now I know what Tom English meant by if he can manage his weight . :confused:

hibbymick
10-01-2015, 07:50 PM
If someone can score a couple of goals a game who cares about his weight. Great debut for him.

Sir David Gray
10-01-2015, 07:50 PM
Geeze oh ,looks like an unfit Tonga Rugby Player ,now I know what Tom English meant by if he can manage his weight . :confused:

I've seen healthier looking sumo wrestlers.

LeithBoozy
10-01-2015, 08:22 PM
Was it not Warburtons???..........

You are spot-on mate, it was a poor attempt. :wink:

BOB MARLEYS DUG
10-01-2015, 08:27 PM
If someone can score a couple of goals a game who cares about his weight. Great debut for him.

Agree.

Pete
10-01-2015, 08:47 PM
If someone can score a couple of goals a game who cares about his weight. Great debut for him.

I'll wait until he starts scoring a couple of goals a game before I decide if I agree with you or not.

Until then he's a fat hearts waste of space. I wouldn't say it to his face though.

Glorious St Pat
10-01-2015, 09:06 PM
I'll wait until he starts scoring a couple of goals a game before I decide if I agree with you or not.

Until then he's a fat hearts waste of space. I wouldn't say it to his face though.

Did he score two?

If so, great debut and the rest of us us can shut up!

truehibernian
10-01-2015, 09:11 PM
Did he score two?

If so, great debut and the rest of us us can shut up!

We scored 6 v Dumbarton.......he still looks a fat mess :aok: my Hearts mate today said his first was a 'glancing touch cos he used his size to get ahead of the boy' and the second was a 'shot on the turn......but it was like a tram turning'............even he said the fans were laughing at his size.

Fair play, two goals, good on the lad - he still looks like a blimp in a Hearts top :aok:

hibees 7062
10-01-2015, 09:15 PM
Settle down. Nade scored a grand total of 1 against us while playing for Hearts......1. He was pish in 99.9% of derbies, a complete no mark, as this guy also has the makings of being.

I have nothing to prove to Hibs fans. I just want to show I can score against them whenever I want to." Settle down . They were his words not mine :rolleyes:

truehibernian
10-01-2015, 09:25 PM
I have nothing to prove to Hibs fans. I just want to show I can score against them whenever I want to." Settle down . They were his words not mine :rolleyes:

Nae worries Christian......I had one of yer birds :aok: (true story) :greengrin

Pete
10-01-2015, 10:16 PM
Did he score two?

If so, great debut and the rest of us us can shut up!

Well I suppose his ratio is technically a couple of goals a game.

:rolleyes:

hibees 7062
10-01-2015, 10:33 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=gDnUsSttSO8

No wonder he scored 2 . They were delighted Dumbarton scored so they could give it the 5.1 . ( at the end of the video )

Steve-O
10-01-2015, 11:17 PM
Bawbags.

Well, to be fair to the rotund fellow, he scored 2 so we can't really say much. Wish our new guy had scored 2!