Ashes - Part 2...

[3pm]

Starts tonight.

Guess : Australia 2, England 2!

[DaveF]

3-1 England. Just don't think the Aussie batting is good enough.

[jodjam]

Canny wait. Think its gonna be close. Both batting lineups prone to the odd collapse. I'm going for 2-2 and England / South Africa select to retain the urn.

[3pm]

3-1 England. Just don't think the Aussie batting is good enough.

Yeah.

Had there chances a few months ago though!

[Stonewall]

Think it will be close but England might just shade it if Anderson, Swann and Broad stay fit.

Both batting line-ups prone to collapse and big question mark over England's 3rd seamer. Should have taken Onions I think.

First mornings play often v important in Ashes series - can't wait.

[sambajustice]

Rest of The World to lose 2-1 to Australia!

[BroxburnHibee]

Genuinely think the Aussies will win easily

2-0 or 3-0

[HUTCHYHIBBY]

Aussies win the toss and bat first.

[HUTCHYHIBBY]

Aussies 12-1, Rogers out for 1

[3pm]

First wicket down. Aussies 12-1.

[HH81]

101-5. Good start. Anderson with latest one.

[jodjam]

6 down. This is oz best track. Gabba record is amazing. Lose here and team ROW are in a great position

[HH81]

Work will be fun today I have watched far too much.

166-6, good start for England.

[3pm]

246-7. 5th wicket for Broad.

[lyonhibs]

Is it just me, or is it a new thing to have a "return" leg of the Ashes just a few months after they were 1st played??

I thought when England won it in Oz it was theirs for 2 years (or whatever) until the Ozzies came over to England?

I could well be way off the mark mind you.

[Haymaker]

Its because Australia are hosting the world cup next winter.

[Zazu62]

Good start for England, pick up those 2 wickets early on day 2 then bat well for 2 days max and the first test is in the bag. I think with joe root batting in the middle order will help England massively as I don't think he's a great opening batsmen. Not seen much of carberry so the jury is still out on him ..

[Zazu62]

Quick question , I see everybody is calling England 'rest of the world' which players are u reffering to? Pietersen and rankin are the only ones I can think of, prior?

[Stonewall]

Quick question , I see everybody is calling England 'rest of the world' which players are u reffering to? Pietersen and rankin are the only ones I can think of, prior?

Prior has South African connections, also Trott and in the recent past Strauss. Morgan was Irish but seems confined to the one dayers these days. Think there's a few others in the one day squads.

[Zazu62]

Not many in the 11 that started today though.

[Off the bar]

anyone know if there are highlights anywhere online or on the cooncil telly?

cheers

[Zazu62]

Can't see anything thought channel 5 would be covering it

[Haymaker]

Can't see anything thought channel 5 would be covering it

All Sky now mate.

[Zazu62]

All Sky now mate.

Only got sky sports news with my virgin/TiVo .. See a small highlights package around 7am before I head off to work better than nothing I suppose :)

[jodjam]

Not many in the 11 that started today though.

Just the 3 in this match. 9 down. Haddin should throw the bat now

[Haymaker]

England 26-0 after 9

[HH81]

68-2

[HH81]

89-7 What the hell is going on.

[3pm]

Ouch. 136 all out. Aussies 57-0.

[Zazu62]

Deary me .

[Haymaker]

What the bloody hell happened there?!

[AngusHibby]

http://bleacherreport.com/articles/1861169-gif-kevin-pietersen-gets-trolled-by-australia-fan-in-1st-ashes-test top patter

[--------]

89-7 What the hell is going on.


Ouch. 136 all out. Aussies 57-0.


Deary me .


What the bloody hell happened there?!



It's a wise cricket fan who waits until both sides have batted before having a gloat - a lesson the English journos have never learned.

I don't know what's going to happen in the series, but right now the Aussies are feeling very sore about the summer series, and I don't think they'll play as badly this time out.

Some of those short-pitched balls took me back to the days of my youth, and the great Lillian Thompson.

Rap a couple of the faceguard, and the batsman's your bitch. :devil:

[HUTCHYHIBBY]

Just watched the highlights of the 2nd days play, shocking effort from England.

[derekHFC]

It's a wise cricket fan who waits until both sides have batted before having a gloat - a lesson the English journos have never learned.

I don't know what's going to happen in the series, but right now the Aussies are feeling very sore about the summer series, and I don't think they'll play as badly this time out.

Some of those short-pitched balls took me back to the days of my youth, and the great Lillian Thompson.

Rap a couple of the faceguard, and the batsman's your bitch. :devil:

The English media had the 1st test won yesterday morning :tee hee:

[Aldo]

The English media had the 1st test won yesterday morning :tee hee:

Pmsl ha ha.

Fwiw the highlights were on freeview last nite at 10pm on Picktv.

O not that anyone is bothered mind.

[Zazu62]

They don't help themselves on sky with Ian Botham going on about them winning 5-0 on the eve of the first test , never gonna happen beefy pal, fwiw I still think England will win the series 2-1.

[3pm]

England 25/1 to win.

[3pm]

Now 16/1 actually.

[3pm]

67/1.

[HH81]

The lead is 500.

[jodjam]

England 2 down. Trott looks as if he has lost all confidence

[marinello59]

England really are getting a doing here. Day 4 could be even worse.

[3pm]

Bookies offering 33/1 on a win.

[jodjam]

Bookies offering 33/1 on a win.

1000/1 would be fairer. Will be largest chase in test match history if they pull it off. I reckon by time we all get up on Sunday England will be 1 down

[Haymaker]

I've taken Monday off work to watch the last day as well.

[--------]

The English media had the 1st test won yesterday morning :tee hee:


Yup. And Botham had them winning 5-0, and everyone seemed so sure that the Aussies had nothing to offer.

The English batsmen seem to be totally unable to read Johnson (not that they have much time when he's bowling at 90mp plus consistently), they're backing off Harris (not a good idea against pace), and their bowlers weren't exactly impressive in Australia's second innings.

It's early days yet. Even if Australia win this match, there's time for England to come back into the series.

There's always the possibility of rain, but if it rains overnight and then clears, that wicket could become very awkward. I mean, it's covered, but the resultant humidity's likely to get the ball swinging ... And the wicket, covered or not, will sweat.

It has to rain for the best part of two days. I'd say. Still - 537 to win - onwards and upwards.

:devil:


PS - why are the England batsmen wearing cycling helmets? :confused:

[jodjam]

Only got sky sports news with my virgin/TiVo .. See a small highlights package around 7am before I head off to work better than nothing I suppose :)

Highlights on each evening on Virgin ch180 (pick) at 10pm

[Treadstone]

The commentating team on SKY is absolutely fantastic. Cricket probably lends itself to the high level of analysis and comment.
The ashes verdict on SKY at 9pm is also excellent Bob Willis is always worth a listen and 'Dizzy' Gillespie is a welcome addition.

[jodjam]

The commentating team on SKY is absolutely fantastic. Cricket probably lends itself to the high level of analysis and comment.
The ashes verdict on SKY at 9pm is also excellent Bob Willis is always worth a listen and 'Dizzy' Gillespie is a welcome addition.

I agree about sky lads with the exception of Willis. He's just too negative for me. Loved him as a bowler with his arm pumping away as he ran in but canny hack him now.

Really enjoy Vaughan on tms.

[Mibbes Aye]

The commentating team on SKY is absolutely fantastic. Cricket probably lends itself to the high level of analysis and comment.
The ashes verdict on SKY at 9pm is also excellent Bob Willis is always worth a listen and 'Dizzy' Gillespie is a welcome addition.

I think that's right and it adds to the pleasure of Test match cricket but at the same time you only have to read someone like Jonathan Wilson or even listen to some of the foreign 'pundits' like Guillem Balague, Gabriel Marcotti etc to realise how short-changed we are as football fans - there's no reason we should have to put up with the inconsequential mindless drivel we get, week in, week out. It should be better.

Was going to post at the start of this match that I thought Australia would raise their game but that they needed a few stellar performances to have any chance. The challenge was always going to be showing they could take twenty wickets and that wasn't guaranteed. Didn't expect the collapse in England's first innings. Watching Trott trying to play Johnson in the second innings was almost painful! It looks like the Aussies have an advantage they will carry with the pace bowling, will be interesting to see how Lyon and Smith bowl in more southern climes.

[3pm]

130-4.

[jodjam]

4 more wickets for 5 runs. This is an absolute doing

[HH81]

The rain is coming :greengrin

[jodjam]

The rain is coming :greengrin

:) aye another delay. Just means another night on the lash in Brisbane for the sky team

[Stonewall]

I think that's right and it adds to the pleasure of Test match cricket but at the same time you only have to read someone like Jonathan Wilson or even listen to some of the foreign 'pundits' like Guillem Balague, Gabriel Marcotti etc to realise how short-changed we are as football fans - there's no reason we should have to put up with the inconsequential mindless drivel we get, week in, week out. It should be better.

Was going to post at the start of this match that I thought Australia would raise their game but that they needed a few stellar performances to have any chance. The challenge was always going to be showing they could take twenty wickets and that wasn't guaranteed. Didn't expect the collapse in England's first innings. Watching Trott trying to play Johnson in the second innings was almost painful! It looks like the Aussies have an advantage they will carry with the pace bowling, will be interesting to see how Lyon and Smith bowl in more southern climes.

It's going to be really hard to come back after this one. Trott looks like his head has gone and every time he looks up for the rest of the series he's going to see Johnson at the end of his run up. If he wasn't such a dick I'd feel pleased for Johnson. His game looked in pieces the last time England toured down under and the monumental slagging he got from the Barmy Army was clearly getting to him and undermining his confidence.

England need to regroup and come back at the Aussies hard, they are vulnerable but have the momentum and it'll be a real test for Cook and Andy Flower to get the team functioning. Time for the likes of Pietersen to show a bit of character because the pressure will be huge.

Interesting times - I'm looking forward to this.

[HH81]

It's going to be really hard to come back after this one. Trott looks like his head has gone and every time he looks up for the rest of the series he's going to see Johnson at the end of his run up. If he wasn't such a dick I'd feel pleased for Johnson. His game looked in pieces the last time England toured down under and the monumental slagging he got from the Barmy Army was clearly getting to him and undermining his confidence.

England need to regroup and come back at the Aussies hard, they are vulnerable but have the momentum and it'll be a real test for Cook and Andy Flower to get the team functioning. Time for the likes of Pietersen to show a bit of character because the pressure will be huge.

Interesting times - I'm looking forward to this.

Agreed, all over now a right old stuffing.

Pieterson is really annoying you just know if he doesnt score for 20 balls he is getting out soon. Lets hope for better in the next test.

[BroxburnHibee]

No surprise to me - a quick analysis of this summers series would tell you that England were very lucky and a 3-0 win was in no way a fair result.

Don't get me wrong England probably deserved to win (home advantage helped) but the Aussies in their own backyard was always going to be a totally different match. I originally said 2 or 3 nil but even a whitewash wouldn't surprise me now.

As for the commentators - thats just the English psyche for you. If you listen to some of the more reasonable commentators just now they would tell you that England have absolutely no chance in the World Cup next year and that quarter finals would be good. I absolutely guarantee it that by the time it comes round it will be the same old crap.

[Stonewall]

No surprise to me - a quick analysis of this summers series would tell you that England were very lucky and a 3-0 win was in no way a fair result.

Don't get me wrong England probably deserved to win (home advantage helped) but the Aussies in their own backyard was always going to be a totally different match. I originally said 2 or 3 nil but even a whitewash wouldn't surprise me now.

As for the commentators - thats just the English psyche for you. If you listen to some of the more reasonable commentators just now they would tell you that England have absolutely no chance in the World Cup next year and that quarter finals would be good. I absolutely guarantee it that by the time it comes round it will be the same old crap.

You're right, they did deserve to win in the summer; however, the batting was far too reliant on Bell and none of the others scored consistently or heavily enough. Australia is never an easy place to go. There were 3 question in my mind: would the comparative failure of 3 of the 4 bankers in the top order (Cook, Trott, Peitersen) continue, what were England going to do about the issue of the 3rd seamer and was Mitchell Johnson a busted flush?

I thought England would have enough to shade it but having serious doubts now.

[Treadstone]

No surprise to me - a quick analysis of this summers series would tell you that England were very lucky and a 3-0 win was in no way a fair result.

:agree:
Even think Englands use of DRS during the summer series enabled them to take command when the chance presented itself. The leeway that was granted in using DRS has now been taken away with the 15 seconds being rigidly enforced.
Aussie bowling attack picked itself for this test match and it delivered. Keep Harris fit (history says he won't play the full five test matches) and Johnson confident and its a long way back for England.

[DaveF]

Had to laugh at Anderson having a whinge at the umpires due to the sledging he was getting. He's one of the nippiest when he has the ball in hand, yet because he was getting it tight, he tried drag them into calm it down.

Next test will go a long way to deciding the outcome of the series I think.

[jodjam]

Trott has left the tour due to a stress related problem. Flower saying he's had it a while now

[DaveF]

Trott has left the tour due to a stress related problem. Flower saying he's had it a while now

Yet he still went on the tour in the first place? Not good for Trott and I hope he recovers fully, but surely the England management could have dealt with that a lot better.

[jodjam]

Yet he still went on the tour in the first place? Not good for Trott and I hope he recovers fully, but surely the England management could have dealt with that a lot better.

Exactly. They were there for a month before first test. Surely that month must have been tough for trott if flower is being honest. Looks like no lessons learnt from trescothicks problems

[Stonewall]

Exactly. They were there for a month before first test. Surely that month must have been tough for trott if flower is being honest. Looks like no lessons learnt from trescothicks problems

I think there was another player who had to go home early from a tour for similar reasons in the recent past: can't remember who it was at the moment. From what I heard on the radio it looks like the England management were aware of his problems so it seems a bit of a strange decision to take him in the first place.

Trott always seemed to be quite an obsessive individual though with the routine he goes through whilst preparing to face a delivery but I feel for him and hope he recovers.

[--------]

Yet he still went on the tour in the first place? Not good for Trott and I hope he recovers fully, but surely the England management could have dealt with that a lot better.


:agree: If it was that bad he shouldn't have been picked. Better a quiet winter to address his situation and a fresh start in April would have been more sensible.

This has been quite a humping the Aussies have given them, but I did think that Bell and Root looked more composed and relaxed in the second innings, as did Cook.

Adelaide should be a more placid wicket (though I don't think the problems at the Gabba were really down to the pitch TBH).

That might give them a chance to steady the ship, though Perth has tended to be a lot fiercer than Brisbane and a graveyard for England. If they're 2-0 down after Perth, the MCG should see it ended.

As said, Harris isn't likely to play the whole series - he tends to get injuries - and we still don't quite know who's the real Mitchell Johnson - this one, or the one who went for 0 for a hundred and plenty not so very long ago? There's no real doubt about the quality of Cook, Bell and Root, and Pietersen can score big provided his big head doesn't get in the way. Prior's a problem - his second innings dismissal was REALLY STUPID, even more so coming from a senior player in the circumstances of the match.

So for those of us who favour the baggy green caps, a good four days. But it ain't over yet.

[jodjam]

I think there was another player who had to go home early from a tour for similar reasons in the recent past: can't remember who it was at the moment. From what I heard on the radio it looks like the England management were aware of his problems so it seems a bit of a strange decision to take him in the first place.

Trott always seemed to be quite an obsessive individual though with the routine he goes through whilst preparing to face a delivery but I feel for him and hope he recovers.

Michael yardy is the other lad

[Stonewall]

Michael yardy is the other lad

That's the one.

[Jonnyboy]

I understand the questioning of the team management but remember this is an unseen illness and from what Flowers said, Trott had been managing it well. In these circumstances I'd guess that the player declared himself fit to travel and play.

Regardless of the circumstances, I hope he gets his health back soon

[Stonewall]

I understand the questioning of the team management but remember this is an unseen illness and from what Flowers said, Trott had been managing it well. In these circumstances I'd guess that the player declared himself fit to travel and play.

Regardless of the circumstances, I hope he gets his health back soon

You are right Jonnyboy.

There is depression in my close family (thankfully not me) so I have some awareness of how it can be covered up and how it manifests itself which would make it so difficult for the management to make a call on this prior to the tour.

A cricket tour in the modern era must be an incredibly difficult environment for someone like Trott to deal with. An endless round of travelling and being away from family and friends for months on end; living in hotel rooms, pleasing sponsors and subjected to the pressures of top level sport. Then in the sanctuary of what you do best, what you love, out in the middle wrapped in a blissful cocoon of focus and concentration and achievement, there is sledging and physical and mental intimidation to cope with and when things are not going well nowhere to hide. Almost uniquely in a team game it can be a very lonely place out in the middle.

In the "good old days" probably up to the days of Botham, there were huge drinking sessions and a boys on tour mentality which allowed a release but like most other sports in the modern era this is not available. At least not without the risk of finding yourself on the front page of the tabloids. When Ian Botham punched Ian Chappel's lights out (successfully) in an Aussie bar thirty five odd years ago no-one gave a **** and it wasn't reported, when Warner tried the same thing (unsuccessfully) on Joe Root he had hell to play.

In the modern era we demand the most of our highly paid sportsmen and I don't disagree that if they want the financial rewards available they should pay the price but there is a cost and maybe the sheer joy of playing the game for its own sake; win, loose or draw is lost. Like our beloved Hibs, it is only sport at the end of the day the likes of Trott deserve our sympathy not contempt.

[--------]

I understand the questioning of the team management but remember this is an unseen illness and from what Flowers said, Trott had been managing it well. In these circumstances I'd guess that the player declared himself fit to travel and play.

Regardless of the circumstances, I hope he gets his health back soon


Yup. As I understand it, he's been suffering from depression and as you say covering it quite well until the stress of an Ashes Test hit him. No blame attached to anyone, really, and as you say, I hope he gets things under control and back to health ASAP.

I notice that Dawson and Clarke are quite a bit less bullish about the sledging on the BBC website today. I don't suppose they appreciated the situation either, really.

[Haymaker]

Broad takes Warner! 34-1.

[HH81]

I didnt see as much today as would have liked but England doing well 174-4.

[IWasThere2016]

I didnt see as much today as would have liked but England doing well 174-4.

:confused: Aussies finished day one play at 273-5

[jodjam]

Guess you have to call it an even day. If carberry hadn't dropped that dolly right at the end then England shade it. Pitch offering a bit so 400 will be a good score

[Stonewall]

Oh dear!

570-9, England made to pay for the dropped catches yesterday.

Catches win matches as they say

[--------]

Dearie dearie me. Petersen does it again. 3 for 66 and deep in it. :faf:

[Mibbes Aye]

Oh dear!

570-9, England made to pay for the dropped catches yesterday.

Catches win matches as they say

:agree:

Was a great example of how a match could potentially have turned.

It sums up the inherent beauty of cricket - how a match pans out depends on a multitude of complicated and complex things, yet it still boils down to taking twenty wickets...

[Haymaker]

135-9!

[lord bunberry]

172 all out, I'm surprised the aussies didn't force them to follow on

[Aldo]

Ha ha just seen the score. Well looks like it's gonnae be 2 - nil to the Aussies.

Wonder what the odds were for an Aussie White wash before this all began??

[3pm]

172 all out, I'm surprised the aussies didn't force them to follow on

I don't think they need to mate.

I'd imagine they will declare soon and England will need to bat for virtually 2 days....which going by their 3 innings so far isn't going to happen!

[jodjam]

172 all out, I'm surprised the aussies didn't force them to follow on

No need to mate. Give the bowlers a rest. A fast bowler puts 8 times his body weight on his front foot when he delivers so I reckon Johnson will want the rest.

Warner should get his 100 then stick England back in

[twiceinathens]

So much for the "will it be 5-0 or 4-1?" assumptions.
but then with a batting order of
Hellish
Hopeless
Harmless
Hapless
Helpless
Haunted
Hassled
Hurt
Humbled
Hunted
and Hubris

perhaps It is not unexpected.

And then of course the poor sods are being lambasted by the ultimate team player Geoff "when I were a lad" Boycott"

[--------]

So much for the "will it be 5-0 or 4-1?" assumptions.
but then with a batting order of
Hellish
Hopeless
Harmless
Hapless
Helpless
Haunted
Hassled
Hurt
Humbled
Hunted
and Hubris

perhaps It is not unexpected.

And then of course the poor sods are being lambasted by the ultimate team player Geoff "when I were a lad" Boycott"


Well, I'd excuse Carberry and Bell from that - and possibly Root as well, since at least he stayed around for a bit before giving it away - but Petersen and Prior need to take a hard look at themselves and the management need to find a shop where they sell guts and backbones for some of the others.

It's not so long ago that English journos were talking about Broad as a coming "all-rounder" - drama-queen's more like it after his display during the Aussie first innings. The fielding's been awful and it looks as if the stress is now getting to Cook, who up till now has been one of the better batsmen for them. If Monty Panesar can stick around for an hour to support Bell, what does that say about the rest of the tail? Monty wouldn't claim to be anything other than a #11, but at least he dug in.

That's a flat track with no venom in it. Perth will be a lot feistier, I think. If they're scared of Johnson on this wicket, goodness knows what they'll be like at the WACA.

Still, Kevin Petersen has a career in musical comedy after he retires if he wants it - I can think of at least one part he could play without any effort at all -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nauLgZISozs

And come to think of it, there's a part one or two of the others could play as well.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z2itQkiQUOE

And Geoffrey could play the Wicked Witch of the North ....

[DaveF]

Got up at 2.40am due to the wife coughing her lungs up all night and lay on the sofa just in time to see the collapse.

Fantastic bowling from Johnson, with Broad, Swann and Anderson all blown away in terrific style. I'm surprised Swann isn't getting a bit of stick fro the press. He certainly doesn't fancy facing Johnson at all and basically chucked it.

[--------]

Got up at 2.40am due to the wife coughing her lungs up all night and lay on the sofa just in time to see the collapse.

Fantastic bowling from Johnson, with Broad, Swann and Anderson all blown away in terrific style. I'm surprised Swann isn't getting a bit of stick fro the press. He certainly doesn't fancy facing Johnson at all and basically chucked it.


I think some of the stuff that was being touted around the English media about him last year didn't help.

Aussies have a big enough chip on their shoulder without giving them more reason to girn, and a lot of what was being said over here before the last series and this one was stupid.

Botham's predictions of England triumphs and Aussie humiliation was a bit like young Albert Ramsbottom poking Wallace the Lion in the ear with his stick. What on earth did he think their reaction would be?

Bell and Carberry showed that this wicket is playable and that a bit of application and heart can take a batsman a lot farther than most of those guys went last night. I don't think one can say that Cook, Root, Petersen and Prior did anything other than give their wickets away - for whatever reason - and Stokes didn't look ready at all.

And it's no good talking about how hard the team works at catching practice if they're all fingers and thumbs when they're out on the field.

Personally I think that this England team may be getting to it's sell-by date and will need major re-working in the next couple of years - kind of what Australia have been doing to their team this year.

[Treadstone]

Cook out early with an atrocious shot and Carberry falls similarly soon after. 1am and 25-2 England will be lucky to last till dawn our time.

[3pm]

247-6.

Cheap wickets again. Soon as either Broad or Trott go then it's curtains.

Australia are more up for it and it's showing.

[--------]

247-6.

Cheap wickets again. Soon as either Broad or Trott go then it's curtains.

Australia are more up for it and it's showing.


You mean Prior?

It's a shambles, really. But it's not unusual, surely.

What WAS unusual was England first winning the Ashes and then managing to hold on to them for another 2 series.

BTW - I see Siddle got Pietersen AGAIN. I think that's now 9 times Siddle's taken Pietersen's wicket in Test matches. :rolleyes:

[Haymaker]

My best pal is heading out on Wednesday for tests 3,4 & 5. Cost him £5k before booze. Safe to say he isnt too happy with the score!

[3pm]

You mean Prior?

It's a shambles, really. But it's not unusual, surely.

What WAS unusual was England first winning the Ashes and then managing to hold on to them for another 2 series.

BTW - I see Siddle got Pietersen AGAIN. I think that's now 9 times Siddle's taken Pietersen's wicket in Test matches. :rolleyes:

Yeah, Prior. Cheers.

[BroxburnHibee]

Be over before lunch IMO.

11/2 for the whitewash is tempting

[Treadstone]

Be over before lunch IMO.

11/2 for the whitewash is tempting

Indeed. Very few matches end in draws these days unless the weather intervenes. England still to prove that they can knock over this lineup twice.

[BroxburnHibee]

This time next week it will all be over.

[IWasThere2016]

You mean Prior?

It's a shambles, really. But it's not unusual, surely.

What WAS unusual was England first winning the Ashes and then managing to hold on to them for another 2 series.

BTW - I see Siddle got Pietersen AGAIN. I think that's now 9 times Siddle's taken Pietersen's wicket in Test matches. :rolleyes:

Siddle is inside the Afrikaan's head :agree:

[IWasThere2016]

This time next week it will all be over.

That's the spirit :thumbsup:

[--------]

Siddle is inside the Afrikaan's head :agree:


Well, there certainly appears to be plenty of empty space in there for him. :greengrin

I watched the end. Broad's dismissal was utterly stupid - he and Prior had got to the point where with care they and the others might have kept things going till after lunch, which would have retrieved some pride and given the Aussie bowlers a wee bit to think about, but he scores one 6 and immediately tries for another and gets out. Donkey!

Prior seemed to throw in the towel at that point - he'd been going well, too - and played an idiot shot and caught down leg-side. (Doh!)

Swann looked scared stiff - nice wee dab off-stump, thank you very much, mate; Anderson did well enough in the circumstances; Monty was just Monty and no blame attaches.

Nasser said something good in the after-match talk - the really annoying thing to him is that so many of them don't seem to be capable of learning from their mistakes, the one exception he mentioned being Joe Root, who IMO comes out of this Test well. Root's second-innings knock was top-class played straight, didn't let Johnson get under his skin, scored well and occupied the crease for nearly four and a half hours. A 22-year-old on his first Australian tour showing the senior men how to conduct themselves.

IMO some of those England guys thought they just had to turn up to win. Four successive Ashes series wins would be a record - did they really think Australia wouldn't fight tooth and nail to stop that? Those guys, and the media pundits who encouraged that attitude, are getting exactly what they deserve.

Four days till Perth. I'd bring Finn in if fit for Swann, leave the batting as is since they did play a bit better this innings, and kick Broad hard up the backside every time he's about to go onto the pitch. That moight get through to him - it's apparently where he keeps whatever brains he possesses.

[Stonewall]

Well, there certainly appears to be plenty of empty space in there for him. :greengrin

I watched the end. Broad's dismissal was utterly stupid - he and Prior had got to the point where with care they and the others might have kept things going till after lunch, which would have retrieved some pride and given the Aussie bowlers a wee bit to think about, but he scores one 6 and immediately tries for another and gets out. Donkey!

Prior seemed to throw in the towel at that point - he'd been going well, too - and played an idiot shot and caught down leg-side. (Doh!)

Swann looked scared stiff - nice wee dab off-stump, thank you very much, mate; Anderson did well enough in the circumstances; Monty was just Monty and no blame attaches.

Nasser said something good in the after-match talk - the really annoying thing to him is that so many of them don't seem to be capable of learning from their mistakes, the one exception he mentioned being Joe Root, who IMO comes out of this Test well. Root's second-innings knock was top-class played straight, didn't let Johnson get under his skin, scored well and occupied the crease for nearly four and a half hours. A 22-year-old on his first Australian tour showing the senior men how to conduct themselves.

IMO some of those England guys thought they just had to turn up to win. Four successive Ashes series wins would be a record - did they really think Australia wouldn't fight tooth and nail to stop that? Those guys, and the media pundits who encouraged that attitude, are getting exactly what they deserve.

Four days till Perth. I'd bring Finn in if fit for Swann, leave the batting as is since they did play a bit better this innings, and kick Broad hard up the backside every time he's about to go onto the pitch. That moight get through to him - it's apparently where he keeps whatever brains he possesses.

I think you're right in saying that Finn should play instead of Swann. He might go for a few but he is genuinely quick and does take wickets. Swann looks like he's lost it but his slip fielding may earn him a reprieve. I suspect they'll want to shore up the batting so could see Panesar and Stokes dropping out for Bresnan and Ballance.

[Aldo]

Well, there certainly appears to be plenty of empty space in there for him. :greengrin I watched the end. Broad's dismissal was utterly stupid - he and Prior had got to the point where with care they and the others might have kept things going till after lunch, which would have retrieved some pride and given the Aussie bowlers a wee bit to think about, but he scores one 6 and immediately tries for another and gets out. Donkey! Prior seemed to throw in the towel at that point - he'd been going well, too - and played an idiot shot and caught down leg-side. (Doh!) Swann looked scared stiff - nice wee dab off-stump, thank you very much, mate; Anderson did well enough in the circumstances; Monty was just Monty and no blame attaches. Nasser said something good in the after-match talk - the really annoying thing to him is that so many of them don't seem to be capable of learning from their mistakes, the one exception he mentioned being Joe Root, who IMO comes out of this Test well. Root's second-innings knock was top-class played straight, didn't let Johnson get under his skin, scored well and occupied the crease for nearly four and a half hours. A 22-year-old on his first Australian tour showing the senior men how to conduct themselves. IMO some of those England guys thought they just had to turn up to win. Four successive Ashes series wins would be a record - did they really think Australia wouldn't fight tooth and nail to stop that? Those guys, and the media pundits who encouraged that attitude, are getting exactly what they deserve. Four days till Perth. I'd bring Finn in if fit for Swann, leave the batting as is since they did play a bit better this innings, and kick Broad hard up the backside every time he's about to go onto the pitch. That moight get through to him - it's apparently where he keeps whatever brains he possesses.

For me it's been the arrogance of the English prior to going out. I think that they had it in the bag even before a ball was bowled. Clarke made a total arse of Cook prior to the first test by announcing the English team which had been given to him by Coik. Australia were never given a hope in hell by the media etc and this seemed to fuel them.

Yeah there has been some mind games but the capitulation of the English batsmen has been a disgrace. (And quite funny really)

So it's make or break in the next test but tbh I can't see anything but an Aussie victory.

[--------]

For me it's been the arrogance of the English prior to going out. I think that they had it in the bag even before a ball was bowled. Clarke made a total arse of Cook prior to the first test by announcing the English team which had been given to him by Coik. Australia were never given a hope in hell by the media etc and this seemed to fuel them.

Yeah there has been some mind games but the capitulation of the English batsmen has been a disgrace. (And quite funny really)

So it's make or break in the next test but tbh I can't see anything but an Aussie victory.


I think some of the England players are beginning to find their form, and there's no doubt that when they're on form England are a formidable team.

The English always seem to have something to moan about in Australia - if it's not the nasty fast bowlers assaulting the poor England batsmen, it's the horrible rude fielders swearing at them or the punters in the stands not making fun of them. Or the newspapers winding them up.

If Cook considers himself to have been badly treated by Clarke and the Aussie papers, he should remember the story of Dougie Jardine and Bill Woodfull during the Bodyline series of 32-33.

Jardine complained to Woodfull that one of the Aussie players had called him (Jardine) a b*****d.

Woodfull turned to his players and asked in a loud voice, "OK, you b*****ds, which one of you b*****ds called this b*****d a b*****d?" Collapse of D R Jardine.

It's an Ashes series, and everything that's happened so far has been no more than par for the course. And it's nothing personal. Aussies do it to everybody - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KLvkjrw2FMY

(And if they think that Johnson's bowling has been 'hostile' in the last two Tests, they should ask Mike Atherton about the 4th Test at Trent Bridge in 1998. Remember David Gower's commentary - "Vicious, really really vicious, straight, right at the target, which in this instance was the head ..." and his later observation that between them Atherton and Donald could write a book, "not that it would be publishable, not in its full form."

Atherton was later asked if Donald had been 'verbally abusing him'; his answer was, "I don't speak Afrikaans."

Ah, the cricketing banter. All good fun.)

It seems really ironic that the Englishman who seems to have handled himself best so far in this series is Joe Root, the youngest player in the team and a guy on his first Ashes tour.

[Aldo]

I think some of the England players are beginning to find their form, and there's no doubt that when they're on form England are a formidable team. The English always seem to have something to moan about in Australia - if it's not the nasty fast bowlers assaulting the poor England batsmen, it's the horrible rude fielders swearing at them or the punters in the stands not making fun of them. Or the newspapers winding them up. If Cook considers himself to have been badly treated by Clarke and the Aussie papers, he should remember the story of Dougie Jardine and Bill Woodfull during the Bodyline series of 32-33. Jardine complained to Woodfull that one of the Aussie players had called him (Jardine) a b*****d. Woodfull turned to his players and asked in a loud voice, "OK, you b*****ds, which one of you b*****ds called this b*****d a b*****d?" Collapse of D R Jardine. It's an Ashes series, and everything that's happened so far has been no more than par for the course. And it's nothing personal. Aussies do it to everybody - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KLvkjrw2FMY (And if they think that Johnson's bowling has been 'hostile' in the last two Tests, they should ask Mike Atherton about the 4th Test at Trent Bridge in 1998. Remember David Gower's commentary - "Vicious, really really vicious, straight, right at the target, which in this instance was the head ..." and his later observation that between them Atherton and Donald could write a book, "not that it would be publishable, not in its full form." Atherton was later asked if Donald had been 'verbally abusing him'; his answer was, "I don't speak Afrikaans." Ah, the cricketing banter. All good fun.) It seems really ironic that the Englishman who seems to have handled himself best so far in this series is Joe Root, the youngest player in the team and a guy on his first Ashes tour.

The problem they've had Doddie is most of their batsman have been 'off form'. They have therefore struggled from the off.

It'll be good to see what happens in the next test because unless they get off to a half decent start then I think they will struggle once again.

[--------]

The problem they've had Doddie is most of their batsman have been 'off form'. They have therefore struggled from the off.

It'll be good to see what happens in the next test because unless they get off to a half decent start then I think they will struggle once again.



I HOPE the next one'll be good.

I've REALLY enjoyed this series so far. :devil:

[Aldo]

I HOPE the next one'll be good. I've REALLY enjoyed this series so far. :devil:

Ha ha you evil man. I don't have sky but watch the highlights with interest. I am hoping for a white wash tbh. :-D

[marinello59]

I am hoping for an England revival in the next test if only to make the series more interesting.

[Stonewall]

Ha ha you evil man. I don't have sky but watch the highlights with interest. I am hoping for a white wash tbh. :-D

I go to bed with the radio on I'm afraid.

Perth test will produce a result. The wicket's so fast and bouncy they say if you're batting you should never look back because you'll get freaked out by how far back the keeper and slips are standing. Apparently Jeff Thomson once bowled a ball which bounced on the track then hit the sightscreen on the full.

However, if you manage to get in there's lots of runs to be scored. Consolation is that the Aussies from the eastern states also have problems adapting to the Perth wicket.

Should be interesting.

[3pm]

I am hoping for an England revival in the next test if only to make the series more interesting.

Yep. Cannae beat sitting with a few beers on Christmas Night watching.

Well, you can beat it actually. But it is enjoyable!

[--------]

Yep. Cannae beat sitting with a few beers on Christmas Night watching.

Well, you can beat it actually. But it is enjoyable!


It may just be my evil mind, but you might like to rephrase this post somewhat ..... :devil:

(What Kenneth Williams used to call a "double insinuendo".)

[Aldo]

It may just be my evil mind, but you might like to rephrase this post somewhat ..... :devil: (What Kenneth Williams used to call a "double insinuendo".)

He he!!!

[3pm]

It may just be my evil mind, but you might like to rephrase this post somewhat ..... :devil:

(What Kenneth Williams used to call a "double insinuendo".)

Perfectly happy with my choice of words!! :o)

[jodjam]

Oz currently 313/6 so prob just shading it after cook losing another toss. Can't understand bresnan playing. Plus he's bowled the most

[derekHFC]

If the Aussie's get 375-400, its all over. England have a horrible record at that venue and they've not exactly batted well so far this series.

[Aldo]

If the Aussie's get 375-400, its all over. England have a horrible record at that venue and they've not exactly batted well so far this series.

375 - 400 is the least they will get.

I think England will struggle to get anywhere near 250 tbh. Too many batsmen out of form.

I think it's all over already.

[--------]

"The highest first-day total on this ground in Ashes history" - of dear!

"And by the end England were looking horribly short of ideas as their troubled tour went through another disheartening day...."

Insufficient and inadequate preparation for possibly the most important series in their history would be my diagnosis. Four in a row would have been the record.

I hope they lose this one. I want to hear Beefy explaining where the 5-0 went to.

[Aldo]

"The highest first-day total on this ground in Ashes history" - of dear! "And by the end England were looking horribly short of ideas as their troubled tour went through another disheartening day...." Insufficient and inadequate preparation for possibly the most important series in their history would be my diagnosis. Four in a row would have been the record. I hope they lose this one. I want to hear Beefy explaining where the 5-0 went to.

I hope they lose the lot (as you've said). Quoting a commentator from yester year

'They think it's all over'

I think the Aussies will be disappointed if they don't reach at least 450. Piling on the pressure.

Pleasing

[jodjam]

England 205 behind with 6 wickets still in the hutch. Siddle should have the South African stuffed and mounted after getting him for a tenth time.

Crazy to think before today Johnson has scored more runs than any Englishman but has not taken a wicket in 38 overs

[3pm]

Decent scores required from Bell, Stokes, Prior and Broad.

[Stonewall]

Decent scores required from Bell, Stokes, Prior and Broad.

I agree 3pm, but out of the four, only Bell has looked capable of getting a big score so far in this series. Massive ask for someone of Stokes inexperience to get a big score under this sort of pressure and Broad and the rest of the tail could easily get blown away again.

England will have to hope Prior is running into a bit of form.

If England lose an early wicket tomorrow you could see them being all out for less than 250 whilst if the roles were reversed you could see Australian getting 350+.

[BroxburnHibee]

Decent scores required from Bell, Stokes, Prior and Broad.

Bell goes for 15 after a good lbw review.

190-5

[BroxburnHibee]

Stokes goes for 18

198-6

[BroxburnHibee]

England throwing it away again

207-7

[Haymaker]

Well this is bollocks.

[BroxburnHibee]

3rd day ends on 235-3

Aussies will bat till lunchtime then let them try and see out a day and a half. Never gonna happen. :greengrin

[Aldo]

England throwing it away again 207-7

He he another capitulation.

Whitewash in cards

He he

[marinello59]

Just as I started typing that it was good to see Bell and Stokes batting well Bell went. Oh well.

[GhostofBolivar]

That's that.

Didn't even make tea.

A pitiful capitulation by England -the only thing they've got to play for now are their careers.

[MB62]

The RetURN of the URN :thumbsup:

Go on the Aussie's, make it a Famous Five :thumbsup:

[IWasThere2016]

BOOOOOOOM! All over .. Aussies win the Ashes.

It's 3-0 - will it be 5-0? Is this appropriate? --->:lolrangers:

Gonna be a hoot listening to some of those 'knowledgeable' English commentators eating the old humble pie :not worth

Fitting Johnson took the final wicket.

Only thing England can be proud of is the Barmy Army in great voice until the end.

Sweet! Pleasing! The lot :thumbsup:

[derekHFC]

Beefy ate a bit humble pie this morning when he said; "I did say it would be 5-0, I just picked the wrong team". :tee hee:

[Stonewall]

BOOOOOOOM! All over .. Aussies win the Ashes.

It's 3-0 - will it be 5-0? Is this appropriate? --->:lolrangers:

Gonna be a hoot listening to some of those 'knowledgeable' English commentators eating the old humble pie :not worth

Fitting Johnson took the final wicket.

Only thing England can be proud of is the Barmy Army in great voice until the end.

Sweet! Pleasing! The lot :thumbsup:

Boycott's been terrific though. Straight to the point and telling it like it is.

[--------]

BOOOOOOOM! All over .. Aussies win the Ashes.

It's 3-0 - will it be 5-0? Is this appropriate? --->:lolrangers:

Gonna be a hoot listening to some of those 'knowledgeable' English commentators eating the old humble pie :not worth

Fitting Johnson took the final wicket.

Only thing England can be proud of is the Barmy Army in great voice until the end.

Sweet! Pleasing! The lot :thumbsup:


No, Stokes played an exceptional innings, way above the quality and responsibility shown by some of the senior players.

I think it was significant that the Australians applauded his 100 and then applauded him as he walked off after his dismissal.

Bresnan and Carberry I thought at least were trying to play.

The big questions raised by these matches (in my opinion) are over Cook's captaincy and the attitude of certain senior players.

Cook seems to have been unable to get his senior players to play a team game - Pietersen's the obvious example, but Bell and Prior have been dismissed time and again playing inappropriate and irresponsible shots, Broad has been less than focussed, and Cook himself seems to have allowed the concerns of captaincy to affect his personal game to the point where his performance in this last test was pathetic. Bell's an accomplished batsman but I'm not convinced of his character; same goes for Pietersen - and on an Ashes tour character counts.

Why play Swann at the WACA? Why not give one of the younger pace bowlers - Rankin? - a chance on a wicket that would have suited him? Why play Prior? They don't have another wicketkeeper? Is Bairstow just along for a holiday? Would Rankin and Bairstow have done any worse than the players who had failed in the first two tests? What about Finn?

How long do you keep picking players who obviously care much more about their own careers and their sponsorship deals and media deals than they care about the team?

England got exactly what they deserved, and I'm lovin' it.

I truly like watching cricket in a non-partisan spirit, but I cannot like this England team no matter how much I try, and they give me little or no incentive to try very hard at all.

[Mibbes Aye]

And now Swann has gone - there may be serious underlying reasons we are not privy to, but it does feel like bad form to quit the sinking ship mid-tour, especially after Trott's departure. I'm struggling to imagine an Australian doing that. Curious as well given that we've done the Gabba and WACA, leaving the MCG and SCG to play which would almost certainly be more sympathetic pitches for Swann.

He's definitely been targeted and suffered as a consequence and it's equally likely he would have been flayed in Melbourne and Sydney though. Doesn't bode well for the English, given a couple of the others are similarly marked men.

Well over 200 wickets with an average (admittedly only just) in the twenties is a great record, as well as Ashes successes that disrupted a long period of Aussie dominance so he deserves some respect.

Difficult loss to the England spine though, and with a good few of their stalwarts both ageing and losing form, it's not a bright future........

[BroxburnHibee]

Absolute shambles of a series for England

Maybe Swann always intended to retire so decided to get home for Christmas.

Think in the months/years ahead it will all come out - personally I think Pietersons inclusion has rocked the boat badly for them.

[--------]

Better start for England this time, though Root's looking shaky.

OOPS! Spoke too soon. Carberry and now Root have gone - 3 for 108.


Good grief! Strauss and Warne are a pair of Olympic-class bores. Not a glimmer of a sense of humour in either of them. And neither of them bright enough to realise that the essence of a good commentator is to say as little as possible and let the action speak for itself. Who cares about which particular mate Warnie had over for a barbie yesterday? :yawn:

Not a patch on Nasser and Bumble.

Or the TMS crowd.

Or Gower and his patented "Banana Guard".

Example below -
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/21Q4wqzl%2BBL._AA160_.jpg

What did you think he was talking about? :devil:

[jodjam]

England scoring way too slow again.

Would never have thought in the summer that partially due to Oz cranking up a bit of pressure England would be without Trott, Swann and now Prior. It's a pretty dramatic turnaround in a test side.

[--------]

England scoring way too slow again.

Would never have thought in the summer that partially due to Oz cranking up a bit of pressure England would be without Trott, Swann and now Prior. It's a pretty dramatic turnaround in a test side.


I'm surprised no one picked up the fact that Trott was struggling - it isn't the first time similar problems have arisen in the England camp, after all. I also find it odd that Swann should have publicly announced his retiral now, rather than going to the captain and coach and telling them he didn't feel fit enough to do the team justice, but that he would stay (if they wanted him to) until the end of the Test series. prior seems just burned out - again, surely someone should have picked up that he was struggling?

All that said, they've just gone to lunch, and if they bowl this afternoon the way they've bowled so far today, they might just have an innings lead. Haven't a clue what Warner thought he was up to - I've never seen an opening batsman in a Test match play so stupidly, and Stokes has bowled beautifully and well deserved Watson's wicket.

[Haymaker]

Slow going today. 101-3 just after tea.

[Haymaker]

112-5 after 52.1. Rogers caught by KP, bowled by Bresnan.

[3pm]

The way it's gone on this tour I exoect them to get bowled out for 25 in the 2nd innings!

[--------]

The way it's gone on this tour I exoect them to get bowled out for 25 in the 2nd innings!


I don't know - Pietersen seems to have sorted himself out, team spirit seems to be a lot more positive. I didn't see anything beyond the first session, but I wouldn't be surprised if they get it back to 3-1 here.

There's obviously something in the wicket.

[Haymaker]

Fair play to Piers Morgan for accepting Brett Lees challenge. Took a fair few hits!

[derekHFC]

I'm of the opinion that Clarke made a boob here. HE should have batted first and put England under more pressure.

[DaveF]

Fair play to Piers Morgan for accepting Brett Lees challenge. Took a fair few hits!

Some cracking video of the over. This one's from the mirror.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/cricket/video-watch-piers-morgan-face-2963358

As you say, well done to Morgan for facing up to it, even though he never saw a single delivery coming his way :greengrin

[Jonnyboy]

Better start for England this time, though Root's looking shaky.

OOPS! Spoke too soon. Carberry and now Root have gone - 3 for 108.


Good grief! Strauss and Warne are a pair of Olympic-class bores. Not a glimmer of a sense of humour in either of them. And neither of them bright enough to realise that the essence of a good commentator is to say as little as possible and let the action speak for itself. Who cares about which particular mate Warnie had over for a barbie yesterday? :yawn:

Not a patch on Nasser and Bumble.

Or the TMS crowd.

Or Gower and his patented "Banana Guard".

Example below -
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/21Q4wqzl%2BBL._AA160_.jpg

What did you think he was talking about? :devil:

It's Geoffrey Boycott who gets my goat Doddie.

[Haymaker]

Cook goes at 65. Root in and out for a duck!

Reviewed and not out!

Carberry out lbw. 86-2.

[Haymaker]

Root gone, run out. 86-3. The collapse is starting.

Bell out for a duck almost immediately. 87-4

[Haymaker]

Lyon takes Stokes. 131-5. England by 182.

[Haymaker]

Bresnan and Broad gone for ducks. 174-8.

Unbelievable over. Dot wicket dot dot wicket dot.

Wind blows the bails off next ball! Very windy, stuff sll over the pitch.

Pietersen gone for 49. Lyon with 5! 179-9

Panesar goes lbw for a duck to Johnson. Last 5 wickets for 6 runs. All out for 179.

[BroxburnHibee]

Yet another collapse from 65-0 to 179 all out.

Carberry - 2 hours to reach 12!!!!!!!!

[marinello59]

Yet another collapse from 65-0 to 179 all out.

Carberry - 2 hours to reach 12!!!!!!!!

Shambolic is an understatement. It was great yesterday being able to tell the wee lad that the highlights would be worth watching for once. I'm hoping he doesn't mention it today.

[3pm]

I mentioned a few posts up that a low score was possible with the way the tour has gone. Albeit they did get more than 25!!!

It happens in all sports of course. When it's not your time, you don't get the rub of the green.

It's the poor buggers who forked out thousands that I feel sorry for. Not a lot to shout about.

[IWasThere2016]

This should be on the Comedy Channel :faf:

English cricket has a new website w..w.w :faf:

[Aldo]

This should be on the Comedy Channel :faf: English cricket has a new website w..w.w :faf:

Ha ha. 231 or so to win.

4-0 per chance??

[--------]

I don't know - Pietersen seems to have sorted himself out, team spirit seems to be a lot more positive. I didn't see anything beyond the first session, but I wouldn't be surprised if they get it back to 3-1 here.

There's obviously something in the wicket.

Oh dear. Did I put the mockers on them by any chance?

POP!



It's Geoffrey Boycott who gets my goat Doddie.

Didn't know you had a goat, John. We used to keep a couple of nannies when we were in the islands - lovely animals and real pets, unlike the male of the species who was an evil, smelly, randy, psychopathic toerag. Goat's milk's awfy nice.

As for dear Geoffrey, I agree. He's even more irritating when he's right than when he's wrong, though he has one redeeming feature in that I can shout at him and feel energised and motivated to cheer on the Aussies to victory.

Strauss just takes all the colour out of life and makes me want to die.

I take it back about Warne, though. I should have realised that at 10.00am on Boxing Day any self-respecting Aussie would still be well beered-up, and therefore also loud and loquacious (dig the artful alliteration there, mate!). He was much more coherent later on - I guess someone must have fed him coffee and doughnuts before his next spell at the mike.

Bumble, on the other hand, is a National Treasure. When Panesar got one in the box from Siddle (?) everybody was falling about, and Bumble observed that Monty should just be grateful it was Siddle who'd done it - not someone like Jeff Thomson. Painful memories for Bumble.

I remember years ago Thommo getting Brian Luckhurst in the goolies with the fifth ball of the over, and after BL had painfully staggered to his feet (about 5 minutes later, after much massage and no sympathy whatsoever from the Australians) the late John Arlott resumed commentary with the observation that "play resumes with Thomson running in from the Kirkstall Lane end ... and there's one ball left".

:greengrin

Looks like England have once again snatched defeat from the jaws of victory. :faf:

[BroxburnHibee]

Oh dear. Did I put the mockers on them by any chance?

POP!




Didn't know you had a goat, John. We used to keep a couple of nannies when we were in the islands - lovely animals and real pets, unlike the male of the species who was an evil, smelly, randy, psychopathic toerag. Goat's milk's awfy nice.

As for dear Geoffrey, I agree. He's even more irritating when he's right than when he's wrong, though he has one redeeming feature in that I can shout at him and feel energised and motivated to cheer on the Aussies to victory.

Strauss just takes all the colour out of life and makes me want to die.

I take it back about Warne, though. I should have realised that at 10.00am on Boxing Day any self-respecting Aussie would still be well beered-up, and therefore also loud and loquacious (dig the artful alliteration there, mate!). He was much more coherent later on - I guess someone must have fed him coffee and doughnuts before his next spell at the mike.

Bumble, on the other hand, is a National Treasure. When Panesar got one in the box from Siddle (?) everybody was falling about, and Bumble observed that Monty should just be grateful it was Siddle who'd done it - not someone like Jeff Thomson. Painful memories for Bumble.

I remember years ago Thommo getting Brian Luckhurst in the goolies with the fifth ball of the over, and after BL had painfully staggered to his feet (about 5 minutes later, after much massage and no sympathy whatsoever from the Australians) the late John Arlott resumed commentary with the observation that "play resumes with Thomson running in from the Kirkstall Lane end ... and there's one ball left".

:greengrin

Looks like England have once again snatched defeat from the jaws of victory. :faf:

:agree:

Be amazed if it's not 4-0 by the time I wake up tomorrow

[--------]

:agree:

Be amazed if it's not 4-0 by the time I wake up tomorrow


Watching just now. England have missed two clear chances - one a keeper's catch that Bairstow didn't move for, and an absolute dolly put down by Cook. Warner played well and fairly sensibly, and Rogers is playing well so far. But Australia are ore than one-third of the way there - 1 for 85 as I type.

Gonnae get to bed soon - working tomorrow!

[Haymaker]

143-1. 88 to go.

[BroxburnHibee]

Well I woke up early but it's over already

Whitewash looms

[--------]

Well I woke up early but it's over already

Whitewash looms


They can't bat, they can't bowl, they can't catch the ball, and it's as well they have that orange buggy for the drinks or they'd spill them too.

Australia should ask for their money back - they thought they were going to see a cricket team, not this hopeless bunch.

Bell's dismissal in the second innings? :faf:

Some of the bowling today? :faf:

[Aldo]

They can't bat, they can't bowl, they can't catch the ball, and it's as well they have that orange buggy for the drinks or they'd spill them too. Australia should ask for their money back - they thought they were going to see a cricket team, not this hopeless bunch. Bell's dismissal in the second innings? :faf: Some of the bowling today? :faf:

I don't think the Aussies who paid to watch will mind one little bit Doddie.

Every aspect of the English game has been poor, apart from one or two individual batting performances (Root)

It's pleasing to know that after being hyped up by the English media they have fallen flat on their faces.

Pleasing.

[--------]

I don't think the Aussies who paid to watch will mind one little bit Doddie.

Every aspect of the English game has been poor, apart from one or two individual batting performances (Root)

It's pleasing to know that after being hyped up by the English media they have fallen flat on their faces.

Pleasing.


I'm sure they won't. I have to say, I've enjoyed the series thoroughly so far, and I'm much looking forward to the SCG and a probable whitewash.

I don't know about you, but I find the "choir" singing "Jerusalem" every morning before play really creepy. "And we shall build Jerusalem in England's green unpleasant land"? Jeesh!

[Aldo]

I'm sure they won't. I have to say, I've enjoyed the series thoroughly so far, and I'm much looking forward to the SCG and a probable whitewash. I don't know about you, but I find the "choir" singing "Jerusalem" every morning before play really creepy. "And we shall build Jerusalem in England's green unpleasant land"? Jeesh!

I have been watching the highlights as don't have SKY and I cannot think of a more fitting venue to complete the whitewash as the SCG.

It has been excellent viewing and the fall from grace has been quite exceptional.

[--------]

I have been watching the highlights as don't have SKY and I cannot think of a more fitting venue to complete the whitewash as the SCG.

It has been excellent viewing and the fall from grace has been quite exceptional.


As the Good Book says - "Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall..." (Proverbs 16:18) :wink:

I've mostly been the watching highlights too - sadly, the people I work for wouldn't understand if I stayed up all night watching the Test matches and then slept all day.

I really admire the England players' seemingly endless versatility in finding ever more ridiculous ways to lose Test matches. :devil:

[Aldo]

As the Good Book says - "Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall..." (Proverbs 16:18) :wink: I've mostly been the watching highlights too - sadly, the people I work for wouldn't understand if I stayed up all night watching the Test matches and then slept all day. I really admire the England players' seemingly endless versatility in finding ever more ridiculous ways to lose Test matches. :devil:

I'll take your word on the proverb mate.

From a seemly strong position in the latest test to total capitulation. You couldn't make it up. They couldn't catch a cold when fielding and I am sure even Stevie Wonder could bat better than most of the upper and middle order.

Roll on the SCG.

[derekHFC]

5th test and England finally win a toss :greengrin

Chosen to bowl which is the preferred choice by the sounds of it.

EDIT: Can't believe Root has been dropped.

[3pm]

Oz 78-3.

[Haymaker]

Started well... Then let them go miles ahead.

[3pm]

England 14-3!

[Jonnyboy]

England 14-3!

England 0-5 :wink:

[derekHFC]

Try 17-4 with KP gone :tee hee:

[3pm]

England 0-5 :wink:

Very much so!

[3pm]

23-5.

[--------]

5 for 61 at lunch, not out batsmen Ballance 17 and Stokes 23.

Johnson rapped a hot one right into Ballance's face-mask just before lunch - I should say Ballance ducked into it - and there was a long stoppage while they sorted things out. If he hadn't been wearing a lid he'd be a dead man.

None of the senior players made anything, and again it's the youngsters showing the way. Why was Joe Root dropped rather than that deadbeat Carberry?

And what's Finn done to be sent to Siberia the way he has?

QUESTION: what odds on England having to follow on?

[Haymaker]

Follow on is inevitable.

[--------]

Follow on is inevitable.


6 for 81 now. I think you're right.

Unless, of course, the Aussies decide not to enforce it, just to pile on the misery ....

Or rain stops play - for three whole days. :devil:

I've actually reached the point where I can hardly believe it any more - how can they be so bad?

[Haymaker]

155 all out. No follow. The convicts will smash this over 500+ to win.

Something has happened between this summer and this series. Both teams are similar, no drastic changes... Backroom problems.

[Haymaker]

Australia close on 140-4. England are 311 behind. All over except for the celebrations.

[BroxburnHibee]

155 all out. No follow. The convicts will smash this over 500+ to win.

Something has happened between this summer and this series. Both teams are similar, no drastic changes... Backroom problems.

Kevin Pieterson?

Farcical series.

Beefy called the score right then :tee hee:

[Aldo]

They think it's all over - it is now. There is no way England will get anywhere near 300.

[jodjam]

They think it's all over - it is now. There is no way England will get anywhere near 300.

288 is the record chase at the SCG. It's gonna be 5-0

[Aldo]

288 is the record chase at the SCG. It's gonna be 5-0


Ha read that earlier. Absolutely no chance of them getting anywhere near that either.

[--------]

155 all out. No follow. The convicts will smash this over 500+ to win.

Something has happened between this summer and this series. Both teams are similar, no drastic changes... Backroom problems.


I think you may well be right.

I really wonder how the England players will come back from this.

They have a bunch of ODI's and T20 games against The Windies, the Super 8 games against New Zealand, Sri Lanka, and South Africa and ODI's and 2 Tests against Sri Lanka. Then they have a five-match series against India, followed by more ODI's.

Maybe the ODI's and T20 games will give them a chance to sort themselves out, but TBH too many of the senior players simply haven't turned up for this series. But then, if there are serious backroom problems (and the arguments about whether Flower should or shouldn't continue suggest that there are) that's where recovery has to start, but who'd want to deal with what appears to be a monumentally noxious can of worms?

I honestly didn't expect England to collapse the way they have, and it has to be said that the Australian batting line-up has shown itself to be far from ironclad from time to time. It's not as if they had a line-up where all the top six were liable to score big centuries like when Border, Boon, the Waughs, Taylor, Healy, Gilchrist, Langer, Martyn, Hayden and Lehmann were playing - they've won mainly with the bowling, a couple of decent batting performances in each Test, and England's utter inadequacy at the crease.

I really don't foresee the dawn of a new era for Aussie cricket - yet.


It remains to be seen what effect Johnson's new-style mouser will have on the England team when he comes out to bat tomorrow (IF he comes out to bat, that is).

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/cricket/25604256

[3pm]

Destruction.

[jodjam]

Bowled out in the equivalent of one session of cricket. Johnson gets man of series but Haddin ran him close.

[marinello59]

Well that was a car wreck of a series. I expect to hear that a few more England players have retired in the coming weeks.

[3pm]

Well that was a car wreck of a series. I expect to hear that a few more England players have retired in the coming weeks.

They already had by the look of it!!

[derekHFC]

Well that was a car wreck of a series. I expect to hear that a few more England players have retired in the coming weeks.

Suspect Prior will be away and possibly Anderson and Bell. Can't see KP going, he'd need to be pushed.

[hibee62]

Suspect Prior will be away and possibly Anderson and Bell. Can't see KP going, he'd need to be pushed.

I honestly can't see anyone retiring, except maybe kp. Everything he achieves from here on will eventually be surpassed by Cook anyway!

If Bell, Cook and KP can rediscover their form England could transition into a good future, but everyone needs to buy into teaching the youngsters who will fill out the top six, we can't have anymore comments like KP re Taylor v South Africa!

[derekHFC]

I honestly can't see anyone retiring, except maybe kp. Everything he achieves from here on will eventually be surpassed by Cook anyway!

If Bell, Cook and KP can rediscover their form England could transition into a good future, but everyone needs to buy into teaching the youngsters who will fill out the top six, we can't have anymore comments like KP re Taylor v South Africa!

Cook, KP and Bell are all excellent batsmen, but they were awful in this series. I like the look of Root and Stokes as well and both should feature heavily in future.

Why they stuck with Carberry, I do not know and for me, Prior has never been good enough. Have they had a decent WK since Alex Stewart?

[--------]

Truth is, the experienced batsmen threw in the towel. Repeatedly shot themselves in the foot to get out of the firing line.

Not for the first time in an Ashes series, of course. Back to the days of Dennis, Jeff and Glenn, I think.

They didn't like the ball in their faces, and they crumbled in the face of the bowling. Pathetic.

(But SO entertaining to watch. :aok:)


For the first time for a long time the English batsmen had to cope with genuine hostile pace and the possibility of pain, and the truth is they didn't like it.

Bumble was right - that last England innings, like so many that had gone before, was disgraceful. A cowardly capitulation in the face of a superior opponent.

I haven't seen so many spineless dismissals in the upper order since Lillee and Thommo were terrorising Boycott, Amiss and Co.

Just where in English cricket is there a bowler with the accuracy and pace of Harris or Johnson?

And how does one prepare batsmen for a Test series by playing limited overs and T20 cricket (which of course is so much better paid than three- or four-day county cricket?

And who exactly was running the England horror show over the past few weeks?

Cook - who as captain SHOULD have been the man?

Or Flower - who I suspect has been pulling the strings all series?

Or whichever bowler just happened to fancy a field change regardless of captain's instructions?

But Alistair 'n Andy have vowed to stay on - so all is well?

[lord bunberry]

Cook out 3rd ball. I bet he can't wait to get out of Australia.

[jodjam]

Aussies killing them here. England's total was quite competitive but this could end up a 10 wicket doing.

[marinello59]

Cook looks like a man who doesn't have the answer to a question he doesn't really understand.

[jodjam]

Cook looks like a man who doesn't have the answer to a question he doesn't really understand.

Aye he looks lost. His press interview yesterday was painful to watch.

Finch gets a great 100. Wonder if it means more than his 100 at the grange in August :)

[HUTCHYHIBBY]

First Victorian to score an ODI ton at The MCG, what a tremendous one day player he is.

[--------]

Starts tonight.

Guess : Australia 2, England 2!


3-1 England. Just don't think the Aussie batting is good enough.


Canny wait. Think its gonna be close. Both batting lineups prone to the odd collapse. I'm going for 2-2 and England / South Africa select to retain the urn.


Yeah.

Had there chances a few months ago though!


Think it will be close but England might just shade it if Anderson, Swann and Broad stay fit.

Both batting line-ups prone to collapse and big question mark over England's 3rd seamer. Should have taken Onions I think.

First mornings play often v important in Ashes series - can't wait.


Rest of The World to lose 2-1 to Australia!


Genuinely think the Aussies will win easily

2-0 or 3-0


Just thought I'd air these gems from th start of the thread again ... :stirrer:

Take a bow, Broxburn - the only one who got anywhere near it. :not worth

[BroxburnHibee]

Just thought I'd air these gems from th start of the thread again ... :stirrer:

Take a bow, Broxburn - the only one who got anywhere near it. :not worth

:greengrin

[--------]

I see they've lost the second ODI as well now. :greengrin

If I've got it right, Faulkner scored two sixes off Stokes in the last over but one - after the crowd booed him for refusing a single, which seems strange - and then dispatched the first thee balls from Bresnan's final over for four apiece.

So that's what? Twenty-four runs in what? 5 or 6 balls?

You have to admire England's versatility - just when you think they've used up all available options in throwing away cricket matches, they come up with a new one.

"Guys are learning out here and sometimes it's a steep learning curve. We had them 240-9 so I think we got the position pretty right today. Nine-and-a-half times out of 10, you would win from that position. These guys never lack the ambition or the attitude when they go out, they're playing for their country but we need to make sure our execution is right and maybe we didn't quite get it right," said England coach Ashley Giles.

Yeah, right, Ashley. You got them down and out, so you did it right, then you let them off the hook, so you didn't do it right; the players have all the right attitude and ambition but they can't quite manage to do it right after all, so maybe they DON'T have ALL the right ambition and attitude after all?

From 9 for 240 to a winning score of 9 for 301 - oh dear oh dear oh dear. :faf:

[Stonewall]

Just thought I'd air these gems from th start of the thread again ... :stirrer:

Take a bow, Broxburn - the only one who got anywhere near it. :not worth

Ouch...I was hoping no-one was going to dig this up.

What was your prediction as a matter of interest?

[Haymaker]

Starting to think Cook and co have money on this tour!

[--------]

Ouch...I was hoping no-one was going to dig this up.

What was your prediction as a matter of interest?


I stated candidly and frankly that I hadn't a clue. I think my gut feeling was that England would either draw or shade it, so I'm really no better at predicting results than any of you guys. I'm just too cowardly to open my mouth.

I REALLY didn't expect the sort of meltdown we saw in the Tests.

And now, just when Englishmen thought it might be safe to go back in the water - DOOdooDOOdooDOOdooDOOdoo - along come the ODIs and they still haven't found their backbones, some of them.

They REALLY shouldn't let them out alone until they've learned to bowl a line and length.

[twiceinathens]

CRICKET AT ITS BEST!

Q. What do you get if you cross the English cricket team with an OXO cube?
A. A laughing stock



Q. What’s the height of optimism?
A. English batsman putting on sunscreen.

Q. What’s the difference between an English batsman and a Formula 1 car?
A. Nothing! If you blink you’ll miss them both.

Q. What do English batsmen and drug addicts have in common?
A. Both spend most of their time wondering where their next score will come from.

Q. What does an English batsman who’s playing in The Ashes have in common with Michael Jackson?
A. They both wore gloves for no apparent reason.

Q. What is the difference between Cinderella and the Pommies?
A. Cinderella knew when to leave the ball.

Q. What's the difference between the Pommies and a funeral director?
A. A funeral director isn't going to lose the ashes.

Best wishes,

[Stonewall]

I stated candidly and frankly that I hadn't a clue. I think my gut feeling was that England would either draw or shade it, so I'm really no better at predicting results than any of you guys. I'm just too cowardly to open my mouth.

I REALLY didn't expect the sort of meltdown we saw in the Tests.

And now, just when Englishmen thought it might be safe to go back in the water - DOOdooDOOdooDOOdooDOOdoo - along come the ODIs and they still haven't found their backbones, some of them.

They REALLY shouldn't let them out alone until they've learned to bowl a line and length.

I was so surprised how England caved in. There must have been so much that went wrong on the tour that we don't know about. For a team which had been together for a decent length of time and shown the resilience to win and fight back from early reverses against good sides (home and away) to roll over and die like this is a real surprise.

A bit like the thread on G O'Cs and DRs interview with Radio Scotland on the main board I would have loved to be a fly on the wall in what happened.

PS - if you'd said you knew England would get humped I would have believed you - honest!

[jodjam]

I'm guessing Flower is delighted to be out of dodge and left it to the king of Spain to sort out

[jodjam]

That's cook hinting he's gonna chuck the captaincy of the odi side.

The oz team are slowly dismantling this England squad player by player.

[--------]

That's cook hinting he's gonna chuck the captaincy of the odi side.

The oz team are slowly dismantling this England squad player by player.


I think he needs to resign from all captaincy. he looks absolutely shattered. I'd make Morgan captain of the ODI and T20 sides (no need for three captains IMO - just gives Broad delusions of grandeur and his head's big enough at the best of times). But who takes over the Test side? Beats me - they're a complete shambles right now.

[hibee62]

For those interested in competitive cricket, Scotland have made the super six of the world cup qualifier in New Zealand despite a shocker of a first game against Hong Kong. Superb performance today hammering Canada.

Although as yet unconfirmed it appears those not in the final 6 will not gain/retain ODI status, and so it looks like Scotland have cost Canada a lot of money today. This was expected as their form has dropped recently. What wasn't expected is the demise of Netherlands, they have failed to reach the super six and as such will probably lose ODI status. As one of the leading associates for a good few years this is a major shock and will be gutting for the Dutch.

[jodjam]

For those interested in competitive cricket, Scotland have made the super six of the world cup qualifier in New Zealand despite a shocker of a first game against Hong Kong. Superb performance today hammering Canada.

Although as yet unconfirmed it appears those not in the final 6 will not gain/retain ODI status, and so it looks like Scotland have cost Canada a lot of money today. This was expected as their form has dropped recently. What wasn't expected is the demise of Netherlands, they have failed to reach the super six and as such will probably lose ODI status. As one of the leading associates for a good few years this is a major shock and will be gutting for the Dutch.

Tremendous scoring in the last match. I liked the tweet about "highest score by a Gaelic speaker" when commenting on Macleod's 175 runs

[--------]

Tremendous scoring in the last match. I liked the tweet about "highest score by a Gaelic speaker" when commenting on Macleod's 175 runs


He practices with a shinty stick and a golfball. Bradman style. :wink:

[HUTCHYHIBBY]

England won this morning for a change, thought it was worth a mention.

[--------]

England won this morning for a change, thought it was worth a mention.


Had to happen some time, I guess. :rolleyes:

[hibee62]

He practices with a shinty stick and a golfball. Bradman style. :wink:

He's also got a gig with Durham.. Collingwood obviously likes what he sees.

[HUTCHYHIBBY]

Just watched the highlights of the 2nd T20 game, what a shambles of a team England are. Aussies fielding was immense.

[jodjam]

Just watched the highlights of the 2nd T20 game, what a shambles of a team England are. Aussies fielding was immense.

And most of the English team didn't play in tests so should have had no problems confidence wise. Oz were lowest ranked t20 side before these games.

Flower now left. Guess with miss sawyer parading around sky it's a good day to bury bad news

[derekHFC]

And most of the English team didn't play in tests so should have had no problems confidence wise. Oz were lowest ranked t20 side before these games.

Flower now left. Guess with miss sawyer parading around sky it's a good day to bury bad news

Perfect timing by the ECB to announce Flower's departure. Any headlines down south today/tomorrow 'should' be about transfers in the EPL and his departure wont be back page stuff.

[marinello59]

Looks like then end of KP's International career as well.

[jodjam]

Looks like then end of KP's International career as well.

Can't see him being too upset. He's now free to tart himself around the t20 scene and spend more time in front of the mirror

[jodjam]

Mitchell Johnson's demolition of South Africa is probably making England's top order feel a lot better about themselves.

[--------]

Mitchell Johnson's demolition of South Africa is probably making England's top order feel a lot better about themselves.


The Ashes were just practice sessions - we'll see what SA do in the next Test.

But I think even the English will have to admit it sooner of alter - Mitchell Johnson is one class act.

The rest if the team ain't bad either.

[hibee62]

The Ashes were just practice sessions - we'll see what SA do in the next Test.

But I think even the English will have to admit it sooner of alter - Mitchell Johnson is one class act.

The rest if the team ain't bad either.

Everyone admits Johnson is destructive on his day, he's done this to South Africa before remember.

He has been, however, hugely inconsistent throughout his career and has not been accurate at all for 4 years, it was not hard to underestimate him in the ashes. The issue comes in how England responded, but that is another discussion. I'm now interested to see how long this purple patch will last... Is he back? Or will he fade away again in a few months?

[--------]

Everyone admits Johnson is destructive on his day, he's done this to South Africa before remember.

He has been, however, hugely inconsistent throughout his career and has not been accurate at all for 4 years, it was not hard to underestimate him in the ashes. The issue comes in how England responded, but that is another discussion. I'm now interested to see how long this purple patch will last... Is he back? Or will he fade away again in a few months?


I believe he's getting better coaching now than he had before.

BTW - what about the Test in Wellington? I went to bed when the Kiwis were 5 down for 94, and checked the score this morning.

6 for 571? :shocked:

Gonnae make sure to catch the highlights tonight. :devil:

[jodjam]

I believe he's getting better coaching now than he had before.

BTW - what about the Test in Wellington? I went to bed when the Kiwis were 5 down for 94, and checked the score this morning.

6 for 571? :shocked:

Gonnae make sure to catch the highlights tonight. :devil:

Highest 6th wicket partnership of 352. Mccullum is only 19 runs off the highest kiwi score. Watch out for the 6 he hits to bring up his 250. The young lad who drops it is very funny

[--------]

Highest 6th wicket partnership of 352. Mccullum is only 19 runs off the highest kiwi score. Watch out for the 6 he hits to bring up his 250. The young lad who drops it is very funny


I caught the highlights last night and I have to say that that was one of the most impressive batting performances I've ever seen.

Not just McCullum, but Watling and Neesham too. I appreciate that the Indian bowlers must have been pretty well desperate and exhausted by the end, but still.

That's McCullum's third big BIG score - the others were 225 in 2010 against India and 224 in the first Test of this series, but what impressed was the way he knuckled down and controlled his natural aggression for the sake of the team and the match. I reckon he restrained himself and coached Neesham through to his century before going after his own target. A real captain - this is what Test cricket's all about.

I watched the first session of the last day and I guess the Nyer Zillunders were having one of those Carlsberg Mondays. I don't think anyone was at work in Wellington - the ground was full and the atmosphere was electric. Only an idiot could say that Test cricket's boring on a morning like that.

Neesham a début Test century, and a beauty at that.

McCullum a triple century, highest ever score by a NZ batsman.

Highest ever innings total by NZ.

Highest-ever third-innings total in a Test match anywhere, any time.

Highest ever 6th-wicket partnership ever (beating Bradman and Fingleton, which made it all the sweeter, I bet).

Home series win, and a step up the rankings.

The Indian bowlers never gave up - bowled their hearts out. That says everything about them.

And every man in the Indian team congratulated McCullum as he walked off. Class.

AND we shouldn't forget Kohli's century - 105 off 135 balls. THAT took guts.

(Did you catch the comment from one of the New Zealan commentators when McCullum had to dig one out when he was on 227 or 228? "Brendan's going to have to work on that - he's developing a bit of a weakness in the 220's.")

:applause: