Sharks v Crocodilles

[Dashing Bob S]

Who would win in a 'square-go'?

[brianmc]

Sharks.

[heretoday]

Often wondered about this. Ahem.

The shark's got the speed through the water and could launch a frenzied attack early doors - especially if there's a sniff of blood about. The important thing for the croc is to protect the soft underbelly.

The croc's tough hide could blunt these early salvos and even break a few teeth. Remember too the croc has hands and feet to call upon. I've not seen many fights won using just fins and a tail! I've not seen any to tell the truth.

My guess is the shark would tire first, allowing croc to deliver the big bite. He's only got to be lucky once and he has the advantage of being able to crawl onto dry land if he wants a rest break.

[Dashing Bob S]

Depends on the depth of water. Shallows, croc, open water sharks.

What about beavers versus otters?

[brianmc]

I'd be rooting for the beaver...

[Woody1985]

I'd be rooting for the beaver...
:faf:

[heretoday]

Beaver. Teeth like pneumatic drills.

Hard worker too.....

[steakbake]

Often wondered about this. Ahem.

The shark's got the speed through the water and could launch a frenzied attack early doors - especially if there's a sniff of blood about. The important thing for the croc is to protect the soft underbelly.

The croc's tough hide could blunt these early salvos and even break a few teeth. Remember too the croc has hands and feet to call upon. I've not seen many fights won using just fins and a tail! I've not seen any to tell the truth.

My guess is the shark would tire first, allowing croc to deliver the big bite. He's only got to be lucky once and he has the advantage of being able to crawl onto dry land if he wants a rest break.

A croc would have more manoeuvrability than a shark but I reckon it depends what kind of shark we're talking about.

A great predator like a great white would take out a croc, i reckon. Without too much difficulty. Something a bit smaller in the range would struggle because the croc has a bit more ability to shift around.

That said, the croc's main way of attack is to attach and roll. The shark's shape would make that difficult, I reckon.

If I had more money than sense and was totally unethical, i'd be tempted to buy in the equipment necessary to run the experiment.

[Wembley67]

http://animal.discovery.com/videos/animal-face-off-crocodile-vs-great-white-shark.html

[steakbake]

http://animal.discovery.com/videos/animal-face-off-crocodile-vs-great-white-shark.html

What a find!! :top marks

Did you ever see the "Ultimate Warrior" simulation, where the Taleban take on the IRA?

[Wembley67]

What a find!! :top marks

Did you ever see the "Ultimate Warrior" simulation, where the Taleban take on the IRA?

I think I did, I recall car bombs and stuff going off in a very tongue in cheek manner or am I thinking of something else :confused:

[steakbake]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msFljrJ7M4A

Around about 2mins 35 is the start of the action. Totally ridiculous, but entertaining.

[heretoday]

I remember suggesting a lion v tiger fight when the question of half-time entertainment was on everyone's mind in the 70s.

But no. They went with the majorettes.................:cool2:

[bod]

the majorettes verses who ?

[One Day Soon]

the majorettes verses who ?

Majorettes versus Cheerleaders surely?

What about a massive six way half time pagger? Sharks, crocs, Taleban, IRA, beavers and otters all on the park at the same time. Lets say each brings a team of ten. So that's 60 on the pitch for say ten minutes.

Interesting dynamics as soon as they start because the armed groups will want to take each other out right away as the biggest threat but that could leave space for one or two of them to fall prey to the less immediately threatening competitors.

[One Day Soon]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msFljrJ7M4A

Around about 2mins 35 is the start of the action. Totally ridiculous, but entertaining.

But this is incredible. Surely the obvious thing is to send the IRA into Afghanistan to sort out the Taleban? All they would have to do is lure them out of the caves and into the car parks.

[Mixu62]

Majorettes versus Cheerleaders surely?

What about a massive six way half time pagger? Sharks, crocs, Taleban, IRA, beavers and otters all on the park at the same time. Lets say each brings a team of ten. So that's 60 on the pitch for say ten minutes.

Interesting dynamics as soon as they start because the armed groups will want to take each other out right away as the biggest threat but that could leave space for one or two of them to fall prey to the less immediately threatening competitors.

Sharks may be at a slight disadvantage on the pitch no? Unless it's a bit waterlogged.

[GhostofBolivar]

My money's on the honey badger.

[heretoday]

Majorettes versus Cheerleaders surely?

What about a massive six way half time pagger? Sharks, crocs, Taleban, IRA, beavers and otters all on the park at the same time. Lets say each brings a team of ten. So that's 60 on the pitch for say ten minutes.

Interesting dynamics as soon as they start because the armed groups will want to take each other out right away as the biggest threat but that could leave space for one or two of them to fall prey to the less immediately threatening competitors.

Good idea. Also there could be a lucrative deal done with the Zoo to provide animals for the show. Business acumen.

One thing's certain. There wouldn't be any pitch invasions! Oh no sir!

[Wembley67]

Good idea. Also there could be a lucrative deal done with the Zoo to provide animals for the show. Business acumen.

One thing's certain. There wouldn't be any pitch invasions! Oh no sir!

Only if Steve Irwin was still with us. Bless his foolhardy self.

[s.a.m]

Are the majorettes and cheerleaders fighting, or providing pitch side entertainment?:confused: And are they tooled up? (Apart from the majorette sticks, obviously. Rubberised at both ends. Nae use.)

[One Day Soon]

Hmm. Some good points here. The sharks will just have to take their chances like everyone else. I mean the majorettes only having rubber ended batons is a bit of a challenge too.

I think the zoo sponsorship option has a lot going for it and it may be that we can get some interest from the Chinese and Russian armaments industries given the participation of the Taleban and IRA. Who makes Armalites anyway?

Maybe we should introduce a tag team element? We could allow each team to nominate their tag partners. So for example you could see how the crocs might want to fit up with a tag team of alligators. Or maybe they would want more of a contrast to their own strengths and nominate some zebras or circus clowns?

[heretoday]

Well obviously the tag team thing would be the ultimate but remember we are restricted by time.

We don't want the players traipsing back on while the ostriches and cassowaries are booting the gorillas all round the ropes.

[One Day Soon]

Well obviously the tag team thing would be the ultimate but remember we are restricted by time.

We don't want the players traipsing back on while the ostriches and cassowaries are booting the gorillas all round the ropes.

**** it. Maybe we should look at taking the whole event to another level. Make it a midweek match in its own right under the floodlights and make it a non stop fight to the finish from a 7pm kick off.

Start with a series of knock out rounds by phylum leading to an inter-phyla final group stage. I know some of them might be a bit boring - the molluscs could be a pretty slow watch - but once you get to the final stages it would be ripe. In all fairness you would probably have to make each knock out match a home and away tie, one land based and the other water bound. I wonder if Rod would spring for a giant inflatable pool that would fit snugly between the four stands?

[heretoday]

Molluscs v sloths would be for purists only - the bout measured in days and weeks rather than minutes. Like billiards.

Rhinos v hippos is the one I'd like to see, especially if the rhinos were bearing some kind of grudge.

[Removed]

How about a fitba related ht challenge?

Macar v Stevie Carr

Followed by

Bad Martini v Falkirk hibee

:thumbsup:

[One Day Soon]

Molluscs v sloths would be for purists only - the bout measured in days and weeks rather than minutes. Like billiards.

Rhinos v hippos is the one I'd like to see, especially if the rhinos were bearing some kind of grudge.

I think we could anticipate a few glamour ties. Polar bears v pandas, cats v dogs and perhaps most exciting, koalas v lemurs.

Of course once you get to the quarter finals and knock out rounds between species you're really talking. There's bound to be a few groups that could bore their way close to the finals, Greece stylee. I'm betting the turtles and the Belgians would be up there.

[WeAreHibs]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msFljrJ7M4A

Around about 2mins 35 is the start of the action. Totally ridiculous, but entertaining.

Full version (http://smotri.com/video/view/?id=v1049013ddf1)

[Dinkydoo]

Looks like the crocodile won on this occassion: croc vs shark (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/2014505/Crocodile-and-shark-clash-in-battle-Down-Under.html)

Although to be fair the shark isn't very big which is certainly a disadvantage - I wonder how the croc would feel about a rematch with a different shark, that had a gun. :dunno:




Sharks may be at a slight disadvantage on the pitch no? Unless it's a bit waterlogged.


You're right, probably best to stage the ones involving sharks at Firpark

[Mixu62]

You're right, probably best to stage the ones involving sharks at Firpark[/QUOTE]

Problem is it would be difficult to tell the punters from the animals.

Croc's vs 'well fans.....now that I'd like to see!

[steakbake]

Its already been done. There's a number of times iv been at ER in recent seasons where its been lions v donkeys for 90mins. Against the OF and the fuds, the south has been full of **** slinging apes as well.

For what its worth, maybe a quick game of 'deal or no deal' with petrie as the banker might work as albeit unfulfilling half time entertainment? Then we could set the IRA/Taleban/sharks/etc on Noel? Id pay good money to see him being pulled apart like soft bread.