BSEJVT
18-01-2011, 09:40 PM
Its not easy to totally **** up managing a team of any description and needs the careful and long term planning of the Board of Directors and Middle Management and the acquiescence of the customers.
Some pointers
Firstly recruit a staff of too many people most of whom are past their best and topping up their pension fund.
This way they will all get bored, go through the motions and not have any time to develop their talents.
Secondly submit that staff to regular change of both management style and personality.
It would help if the aims and objectives of the team changed regularly and more people ill suited to those aims and objectives were recruited.
Thirdly, before beginning to address the situation move out any of the better performers who could act as aspirational figures for those remaining.
Pretty Basic stuff up to now.
Fourthly, advise the bulk of the team that they were being performanced managed and placed on short term contracts.
Whether you as the management were responsible for their recruitment doesnt matter.
This should reinforce their loyalty to the employers and make them feel valued and that they work for a business looking to go places.
It should make them prepared to lay their bodies on the line and strain every sinew safe in the knowledge their futures are secure.
Fifthly, Recognise that the situation is beyond repair and seek to have yourself sacked before you are too tainted by the mess you have had a large part in creating.
Moving in to the clever stuff
As the new Manager commence a program of alienating everyone in the team from you and each other and removing any last shred of self esteem or confidence they may have.
Tricky to carry off but can be done by:
1) Asking them to turn up for work when their performance is poor
2) Asking them not to turn up for work if and when they are showing signs of improvement
3) Disrupt their working pattern so that they dont know if they are coming going or staying or if and when they may be needed for work
4) Disorientate them by continuously changing the team they work in and the duties they are asked to perform within it
5) Tell them they are on gardening leave working their notice
6) Call upon them without warning to work on a job crucial to your employers and on which your future might rest.
I think it would be pretty difficult to improve on the above in an idiots guide to management.
Hibs have done every single one of them but credit to CC, he has been responsible for the really clever stuff.
Yes that shower of ***** are almost without exception not fit to wear the shirt.
I defy anyone to tell me that CC has done a single thing to improve the team the club or our position.
IMO he couldnt have ****ed things up worse had he been trying to do so and shows no conviction at all in his team selections.
I honestly think our problems are so bad and varied he just doesnt know where to start and is just rolling the dice hoping to get lucky.
He must start by binning some of them for good and never bringing them back no matter what.
Some pointers
Firstly recruit a staff of too many people most of whom are past their best and topping up their pension fund.
This way they will all get bored, go through the motions and not have any time to develop their talents.
Secondly submit that staff to regular change of both management style and personality.
It would help if the aims and objectives of the team changed regularly and more people ill suited to those aims and objectives were recruited.
Thirdly, before beginning to address the situation move out any of the better performers who could act as aspirational figures for those remaining.
Pretty Basic stuff up to now.
Fourthly, advise the bulk of the team that they were being performanced managed and placed on short term contracts.
Whether you as the management were responsible for their recruitment doesnt matter.
This should reinforce their loyalty to the employers and make them feel valued and that they work for a business looking to go places.
It should make them prepared to lay their bodies on the line and strain every sinew safe in the knowledge their futures are secure.
Fifthly, Recognise that the situation is beyond repair and seek to have yourself sacked before you are too tainted by the mess you have had a large part in creating.
Moving in to the clever stuff
As the new Manager commence a program of alienating everyone in the team from you and each other and removing any last shred of self esteem or confidence they may have.
Tricky to carry off but can be done by:
1) Asking them to turn up for work when their performance is poor
2) Asking them not to turn up for work if and when they are showing signs of improvement
3) Disrupt their working pattern so that they dont know if they are coming going or staying or if and when they may be needed for work
4) Disorientate them by continuously changing the team they work in and the duties they are asked to perform within it
5) Tell them they are on gardening leave working their notice
6) Call upon them without warning to work on a job crucial to your employers and on which your future might rest.
I think it would be pretty difficult to improve on the above in an idiots guide to management.
Hibs have done every single one of them but credit to CC, he has been responsible for the really clever stuff.
Yes that shower of ***** are almost without exception not fit to wear the shirt.
I defy anyone to tell me that CC has done a single thing to improve the team the club or our position.
IMO he couldnt have ****ed things up worse had he been trying to do so and shows no conviction at all in his team selections.
I honestly think our problems are so bad and varied he just doesnt know where to start and is just rolling the dice hoping to get lucky.
He must start by binning some of them for good and never bringing them back no matter what.