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iwasthere1972
12-08-2010, 11:46 AM
1. Thou shalt not pay HMRC on time and will only pay up after threat of court action.


Please add. I've made a start.

lyonhibs
12-08-2010, 11:49 AM
2. Thou shalt sit at countless AGM's, ask thyself "Where is Vladimir and why are we talking about lightbulbs" but thou shall not raise thou voice of discontent to Rodney.

degenerated
12-08-2010, 11:51 AM
3. thou shalt misaporopriate charity funds to entertain random slappers.

surreyhibbie
12-08-2010, 11:53 AM
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbours' fine stadium and wholly-owned training facilities, but deride tham as inferior to thine own.

duncs
12-08-2010, 11:53 AM
4. Thou shalt deny, deny, deny. "There are no problems at this club...the media have it in for us"

Hillsidehibby
12-08-2010, 11:55 AM
Thou shalt not attend Gary MacKays testimonial

The Godfather
12-08-2010, 11:58 AM
Thou Shalt never question the wisdom of 'Vlad the Great' for he has a plan and it is a great plan, for he will deliver unto us great fortunes such as European Cups, World Cups, Wimbledon, The Ryder Cup, The Monoco GP, WW3 and an academy award for 'a big club in a supporting role'. :faf:

bighairyfaeleith
12-08-2010, 11:58 AM
Thou shall not question player registration fees to kaunas

lyonhibs
12-08-2010, 11:59 AM
Thou shalt bow to the continental Director of Football. Sir Jim Duffy-ski.

degenerated
12-08-2010, 11:59 AM
Thou shalt not attend Gary MacKays testimonial

or craig leveins, in fact you will have to have a second one and invite a "wee" team to take part and make sure of a decent pay day for a club legend

flash
12-08-2010, 12:01 PM
Thou shalt not destroy furry Russian hats in a fit of pique ( or maybe thou shall)

Sandy
12-08-2010, 12:03 PM
Thou shalt not raise one's head from the sand in protest until it is WAAAAAAAAAAY to late.

Caversham Green
12-08-2010, 12:05 PM
Thou shalt be shopping in Edinburgh at all times lest the great one call thee.

Phil D. Rolls
12-08-2010, 12:46 PM
Thou shalt hold thy hand to thy breast and nod with sagacity every November 11th without having a clue why thou doest it.

Crazyhorse
12-08-2010, 12:47 PM
Thou shalt be shopping in Edinburgh at all times lest the great one call thee.

Thou shalt not think

Thou shalt not question

Thou shalt believe everything that the Vlad thy lord shall say unto thee

--------
12-08-2010, 12:52 PM
Thou shalt not think

Thou shalt not question

Thou shalt believe everything that the Vlad thy lord shall say unto thee



Thou shalt suck it ALL up and ask for more.

dangermouse
12-08-2010, 01:14 PM
1. You shall not worship any other god but Vlad.

2. You shall not make a graven image of Vlad.

3. You shall not take the name of Vlad in vain.

4. You shall not play hoofball on the Sabbath.

5. You shall not dishonor Vlad and Rodney.

6. You shall not murder the beautiful game.

7. You shall not partake in love ins on JKB

8. You shall not steal while in the clubstore changing room.

9. You shall not commit perjury by claiming Nade is a striker.

10. You shall not covet your rivals new East Stand.

Barney McGrew
12-08-2010, 01:14 PM
Thou shall continually claim to have a 'special relationship' with a cup competition that thou hast won the same number of times in the last hundred years as Clyde have.

DCI Gene Hunt
12-08-2010, 01:59 PM
Thou shalt not stand up to thy great leader, lest thy great Romanov smite thee down with thy teriffic power. :vladsheep:

Thou shalt play dirty, verily, via much fouling, diving, cheating, and much woe of officials' supposed bias.

Thou shalt exhibit stunning hypocrisy by slagging of thy great rivals, Hibernian FC, accusing them of being "pish", verily, whilst ignoring the stunning crapness of thy hopelessly keech Hertz team.

Thou shalt regularly make an erse of thyself in front of thy Hibby workmates by talking pish, verily, opening thy up to a good deserved verbal smiteing. :lolyam:

Thou shalt have a keech-hoose of a stadium, with a deathtrap/pigeon loft of a stand.

Thou shalt lack intelligence and espouse ignorance, verily.

Thou shalt "believe". :ostrich:

Thou shalt convince thyself unswervingly, despite all evidence to the contrary, that Hertz are Edinburgh's "Big Team", and attempt to rub thy glorious Hibby rivals' faces in it, thus opening thy up to teriffic ridicule; woe to thee. :yamlaugh:

Thou shalt drink poor-quality alcoholic beverages, such as Tennant's and Strongbow.

Thou shalt be bitter and twisted for all of thy days.

The Guv

Baader
12-08-2010, 02:09 PM
Thou shalt not win the Champions League.

WellingtonHibby
12-08-2010, 02:35 PM
Yamandments. :agree:

Pretty Boy
12-08-2010, 02:44 PM
Thou shalt groom an underage girl on a popular fans forum then perform a sex act with her in the disabled toilets at the PBS.

flash
12-08-2010, 02:50 PM
Thou shalt prance around the pitch fawning obseqiously and chanting moronically when the Horned One deigns to make an appearance.

Hattrick Baker
12-08-2010, 02:50 PM
Thou shall deem giving the pbs to UBIG is a good thing, that means now we don't have a stadium of our own or a training academy, we are in a great position as tax man cannot take them, even though we shall have no assets to our name, but a mammoth debt to repay, but thou shall not question god

Barney McGrew
12-08-2010, 02:51 PM
Thou shalt not pay any debts because we owe it all to ourselves anyway

Hibs On Tour
12-08-2010, 02:59 PM
Thou shalt have thein bretheren accept thy demise within the next 5 of God's years, nay even welcoming this 'end of days' as being "perhaps the best thing that could happen to us". And verily thy club shall desist...

EskbankHibby
12-08-2010, 03:34 PM
Thou shalt remain a stranger to the term 'irony', particularly when in relation to stadium redevelopment.

http://www.hmfckickback.co.uk/index.php?/topic/77421-planning-application-in-for-new-aberdeen-stadium/

Gettin' Auld
12-08-2010, 03:41 PM
Thou shalt NEVER build a £51 Million stand

Barney McGrew
12-08-2010, 04:22 PM
Thou shalt fill five cardboard boxes full of bricks, paperwork and various items of tat that have been found lying about in the office and deliver it forthwith to the Council Planning Dept with the motto attached "Now that's what I call a Planning Application".

And thou shalt be charged £1m for the priviledge

hibee92
12-08-2010, 04:37 PM
The first rule of Fight Club is, you do not talk about Fight Club.


Oh wait... :rolleyes:

Kevvy1875
12-08-2010, 05:47 PM
Thou shalt take up arms at a time of national crisis and single handedly fight off the evil armies of tyranny, thus freeing your fellow citizens from a life of occupation and subjection.

DCI Gene Hunt
12-08-2010, 06:49 PM
May I be forgiven for my naivety, but what does "PBS" stand for? Presumably some sort of acronym for Yamland.

Some more "Yamandments"...

Thou shalt not receive a good football manager; only has-beens, rejects and other unemployables.

Thou shalt not maketh any attempt whatsoever to lift Christian Nade, lest thy mighty weight come crashing down to Earth like thunder and smite thee, verily.

Thou shalt repeateth, verily, like a broken record, the same old cheap, cliched, crap insults to the righteous Hibee fans, overeth and overeth again, on Hibs stories on the Edinburgh Evening News website, and thy shall risk the wrath and mighty ridicule of all the righteous Hibees all over the land.

Thou shalt produce a boring manager and useless huddies of players for thy national football team, and thence bring much woe and shame on thy nation.

Thou shalt avoid the top 6 of the SPL, verily.

Thou shalt be pumped rotten by English teams in pre-season friendlies; thou shalt also receive much woe and ridicule from thy righteous Hibees, who despite having a pish defence and midfield still manage to emerge victorious in thy encounters.

Thou shalt dwell in the Ghettos of Western Edinburgh, muchly spiteful to thee outsiders.

Thou shalt drag thy knuckles along the pavement at all times, only rising upon the cold day in hell when thy useless lump of mince Christian Nade actually manages to score a goal.

Thou shalt believe in a grand conspiracy against Hertz, with other teams, the SFA, the economy, banks and match officials all conspiring to destroy thy keech football club.

Thou shalt remember Albert "The Heartbreaker" Kidd, on that fateful day in The Lord's Year 1986 A.D., and thou shalt weep with woe In Memoriam.

Gene Genie

Sergey
12-08-2010, 06:51 PM
3. thou shalt misaporopriate charity funds to entertain random slappers.

Bugger. I was going to go along those lines.....

Thou shaln't interfere with the signal on my new Plasma TV

Phil D. Rolls
12-08-2010, 06:57 PM
May I be forgiven for my naivety, but what does "PBS" stand for? Presumably some sort of acronym for Yamland.

Gene Genie

Pink Bus Shelter - surprised you didn't know that Guv. :whistle:

DCI Gene Hunt
12-08-2010, 07:05 PM
Pink Bus Shelter - surprised you didn't know that Guv. :whistle:

Ah I see. Ta muchly for the info, Filled. :cheers:

I usually refer to that midden of filth and iniquity as "Yamland", "S-cumcastle", "S-winecastle", "Sh*tecastle", "Sh*tehouse" or, more simply, "That *****in' Lot". :tumble:

The Guv

calamitus
12-08-2010, 08:06 PM
Those that obey these commandments shall be protected from a fiery fate.

By asbestos.

LeithBoozy
12-08-2010, 08:28 PM
Thou will desist from invading the pitch and attacking Deek, as you will surely be smitten by the holy casper ghost. :agree:

Bishop Hibee
12-08-2010, 08:36 PM
Thou shalt not complain about a convicted sex offender being appointed manager of you team.

Thou shalt rake the buckets for something to eat and upon finding a dead rat, think it's a treat.

Albanian Hibs
12-08-2010, 08:44 PM
Thou shalt not complain about a convicted sex offender being appointed manager of you team.

Thou shalt rake the buckets for something to eat and upon finding a dead rat, think it's a treat.

:faf:

Halifaxhibby
12-08-2010, 08:52 PM
Thou shalt not wash
Thou shall collect a giro
Thou shall continue to be disillusioned in thinking we will ever split the bigot brothers
:greengrin

Zorro
12-08-2010, 09:48 PM
Thou shalt persist in having an obsession that thou's club is the big club, to an extent that would even have Dr Freud wondering if he had seriously under-calculated his theory on envy of a certain part of the male anatomy...

Brads Laing
12-08-2010, 10:06 PM
Thou Shalt never question the wisdom of 'Vlad the Great' for he has a plan and it is a great plan, for he will deliver unto us great fortunes such as European Cups, World Cups, Wimbledon, The Ryder Cup, The Monoco GP, WW3 and an academy award for 'a big club in a supporting role'. :faf:
:top marksGenius mate

SvenNeil
12-08-2010, 11:07 PM
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbours ass, even if it is Paul Hartley :wink:

AK86
12-08-2010, 11:11 PM
thou shall live in squalor, yet see only luxury
thou shall live in debt, but refuse to accept it
thou shall wave union jacks with little red hands, and sing like like the rangers
thou shall wear blood stained turd colours, and twirl them like little cheerleaders
thou shall bend over while king vlad rogers us vigorously
thou shall convince ourselves that the whole world has it in for us, even when nobody gives a friar tuck about us
thou shall stand silent when top of the league and our manger is sacked
thou shall put our fingers in our ears , shouting NANANANABRRRR when our 3 most influential players tell us all is not right
thou shall lose 7 nil to the wee team to the east
thou shall live in the dark..............because 60watt light bulbs are the way forward

Phil D. Rolls
13-08-2010, 09:02 AM
Thou shalt wear thy blazer and club tie with pride even if thy wife hath sent thee for the rolls.

Speedway
13-08-2010, 09:14 AM
Selected readings from the Book of Vlad:

Chp 3 vs. 17

17. For thus there were great tumults in the land Gorgay and the people rent their hats in anguish for the space of 40 seasons. There was much weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth for it became known by decree that Paulus from the seed of Hartley would shun the filthy and loathsome creatures of Gorgay and take his journey north to the wild and ferocious beasts of Pitt o' Drie, meaning crap.

18. And it was seen that Vlad did indeed hide his light under a bushel for no-one could see it. And behold, it came to pass in the ev'n tide that his lamp t'was only 40 watt and was not enough to light the land round about. Lo, the people wandered thereafter in darkness blindly believing , for they could not see.

ginger_rice
13-08-2010, 09:22 AM
Thou shalst twirl thy scarves whilst thinking thyselves looking cool it matters not that the rest of the world think you look like pratus.

LeithBoozy
13-08-2010, 11:26 AM
The yamites, a tribe from the far west, were outcast by god for worshiping a false idol. It tells us in the book of Vladaroddomy, that god put a curse on them, not for them a plague of locust, but something far worse.A roman soldier by the name of ALBERTUS KIDDIUS. :wink: