View Full Version : Yams Vlad's Basketball diaries - Sound familiar?

18-05-2010, 07:19 AM

18-05-2010, 07:30 AM
Nothing to see here just move along laddies :greengrin

18-05-2010, 09:18 AM
:faf: And that's with basketball tae - his first choice sport. The guy's not got a clue.:thumbsup:

18-05-2010, 09:54 AM
:faf: And that's with basketball tae - his first choice sport. The guy's not got a clue.:thumbsup:

Phase One – Fire the incumbent midway through the season.

This would be George Burley.

Phase Two – Bring in a big name to settle things down.

Welcome aboard, Graham Rix. Not a BIG name, admittedly, but a well-known name - to the police, to the Probation Service, to the Sex Offenders Register.

Phase Three – Fire him.

Done that.

Phase Four – Handpick a clearly incompetent replacement.

This would be Ivanauskas? Or Malofeev? Or Korobotchka? Or Steven Frail? No shortage of dumbasses in Gorgie, at least.

Phase Five – Fire him. Fire the **** out of him.

Done that. All four. Some of them more than once. This is exciting!

Phase Six – Do, say, and suggest crazy alternatives during the next 24 hours.

Been here several times.

Phase Seven – Target the NBA’s disgruntled Europeans.

AKA "World Cup stars".

Phase Eight – Fill your Non-EU spots with the holy triumvirate of overpaid, underplayed American guards.

Or in Hearts' case, Nade, Kingston, Palazuelos.... Plus as many Lithuanians as you can get into a shipping container. And those two big-name World Cup stars.

Phase Nine – Merchandising, merchandising, merchandising.

Russian hats and "what the Beautiful People will be wearing this summer".

Phase Ten – Cut the players without cause. The Vladimir Romanov way.

That would be Pressley. And Hartley. And Goncalves. Just one more step and HoMFC is unstoppable. World domination (and World Cup stars) will soon be theirs.

Phase Eleven – Use your money on elite Europeans.

That would be another container load of Lithuanians?

Lithuanians who've changed their names by Deed Poll to "Rooney", "Ronaldo", Messi", "and so on?

Actually, Matty, you're right - the goon's completely round the S-bend and halfway down the sewer.

18-05-2010, 10:09 AM
Just the one or two REMOTE similarities from across the road then :faf::faf::faf: The man has lost it, if indeed he ever had 'it' in the first place.

18-05-2010, 09:39 PM
I mentioned this to a Yam on the phone today. He just laughed and said "Your just getting surreal now. Comparing Hearts with a basketball team!" Oh dear. His analysis and comprehension skills are somewhat lacking. However, although if had conveniently missed the point, I didn't like to tell the deluded clown that comparing Hearts to a football team would be surreal.