Funerals

[Woody1985]

Just back from my second funeral in 9 days :boo hoo:

One was conducted by a humanist and todays was carried out by a priest / minister (whatever).

It made me think about religion and the stuff on here lately.

The humanist reading was so refreshing and actually focused on the person you were there to remember and everything revolved around them.

The priest today mentioned my great uncle at the start of the ceremony for a couple of minutes and then just started slavering pish about god for the next 5/10 minutes non stop without mention of my uncle at all. I thought it was all a bit pathetic.

Now I understand that's what his kids wanted and what he believed in but at least let it focus on the person rather than turn it into a story about god and jesus. :grr:

[MSK]

Just back from my second funeral in 9 days :boo hoo:

One was conducted by a humanist and todays was carried out by a priest / minister (whatever).

It made me think about religion and the stuff on here lately.

The humanist reading was so refreshing and actually focused on the person you were there to remember and everything revolved around them.

The priest today mentioned my great uncle at the start of the ceremony for a couple of minutes and then just started slavering pish about god for the next 5/10 minutes non stop without mention of my uncle at all. I thought it was all a bit pathetic.

Now I understand that's what his kids wanted and what he believed in but at least let it focus on the person rather than turn it into a story about god and jesus. :grr:I was at my late Uncles "cremation" a few months back at Warriston...a few "brief" words by the Minister followed by a few words by my Aunty & my Cousin...after they said their stuff there was a short prayer then it was over ..no songs..no fanfare....just the way my Uncle would have wanted, he wasnt religious & enjoyed the simple things in life without all the fuss..

It was emotional but as short as it was it was perfect ...

[GlesgaeHibby]

Just back from my second funeral in 9 days :boo hoo:

One was conducted by a humanist and todays was carried out by a priest / minister (whatever).

It made me think about religion and the stuff on here lately.

The humanist reading was so refreshing and actually focused on the person you were there to remember and everything revolved around them.

The priest today mentioned my great uncle at the start of the ceremony for a couple of minutes and then just started slavering pish about god for the next 5/10 minutes non stop without mention of my uncle at all. I thought it was all a bit pathetic.

Now I understand that's what his kids wanted and what he believed in but at least let it focus on the person rather than turn it into a story about god and jesus. :grr:

I've only ever been to 2 funerals, and both were totally non religious. Both were highly personal and a great way to celebrate their life.

I would hate to go to a funeral of somebody I was close to and sit through some minister not doing the person justice.

[ArabHibee]

I went to a friend's fathers funeral which was conducted by a humanist and found it a very good service, very personal and found out quite a few things about the chap that I didn't know.

The funny thing is, this funeral was at least 6 or 7 years ago, yet it sticks in my mind far more than any religious ceremony has.

[Phil D. Rolls]

Just back from my second funeral in 9 days :boo hoo:

One was conducted by a humanist and todays was carried out by a priest / minister (whatever).

It made me think about religion and the stuff on here lately.

The humanist reading was so refreshing and actually focused on the person you were there to remember and everything revolved around them.

The priest today mentioned my great uncle at the start of the ceremony for a couple of minutes and then just started slavering pish about god for the next 5/10 minutes non stop without mention of my uncle at all. I thought it was all a bit pathetic.

Now I understand that's what his kids wanted and what he believed in but at least let it focus on the person rather than turn it into a story about god and jesus. :grr:

I am becoming insreasingly interested in humanism, and I find it is the way that I can make most sense of the planet and my purpose on it. I've no problem with people who use religion as their guide, but as you say, very often funerals are spoled by a preacher who can't connect with the people he is speaking to.

The same goes for humanists, there are a lot of humanist speakers who can't relate to the audience as well. For me, a funeral is about accepting events and leaving with a stronger purpose in life. That doesn't always happen.

[Dashing Bob S]

Just back from my second funeral in 9 days :boo hoo:

One was conducted by a humanist and todays was carried out by a priest / minister (whatever).

It made me think about religion and the stuff on here lately.

The humanist reading was so refreshing and actually focused on the person you were there to remember and everything revolved around them.

The priest today mentioned my great uncle at the start of the ceremony for a couple of minutes and then just started slavering pish about god for the next 5/10 minutes non stop without mention of my uncle at all. I thought it was all a bit pathetic.

Now I understand that's what his kids wanted and what he believed in but at least let it focus on the person rather than turn it into a story about god and jesus. :grr:

Had recent experiences very like yours. It put even more of those christian salesmen than ever. For me personally, the humanist services i've been to actually focus on the deceased and provide a far more fitting way of grieving for them than the tosh spouted by those pious fools in collars and frocks.

[matty_f]

Had recent experiences very like yours. It put even more of those christian salesmen than ever. For me personally, the humanist services i've been to actually focus on the deceased and provide a far more fitting way of grieving for them than the tosh spouted by those pious fools in collars and frocks.

My father in law's funeral last week was a Humanist service (carried out by a good Hibby - Ivan Middleton), it was a fantastic service as far as these things go - very personal, all about my father in law, and with no preaching at all.

We used Ivan for my kids' naming ceremonies, and he was great with that too.

I'd definitely recommend the Humanist Society for events like this, if you are not religious.:agree:

[J-C]

My sister passed a way last year nad it was a humanist ceremony, must admit I found a lot better and as you said, focussed on the life of the individual.

[Twa Cairpets]

I've not beem to a humanist funeral, so cant comment on how they are. I find religious funerals very "functional", there appears to be little of personal remembrance but a lot of God.

The last one I was at was an Aunt from my wifes side of the family. Regardless of my personal views on religion, it would have been unthinkable for the important people there - her husband, sister etc for it to have been any other than a religious service. Its what she wanted and what they wanted because that was/is their belief - anything else would have been improper.

Its not for me though, and I would like it if ministers/priests would take the trouble to find out something more than a brief history of the deceased and regurgutate in a patronising tone. Im sure there are some very good ones who do something that is memorable and respectful at the same time out there, I just havent witnessed one.

[ArabHibee]

I think the problem with any funeral, whether it be religious or not, is that if the person taking that said funeral does not really know the person they are talking about then it doesn't feel personal.
I can be 100% sure that the last few funerals I have been to that were taken by a minister or priest, the person who had died hadn't been near a church for a very long time, so why have a religious service?
I think that's what puzzles me.