Claims to Lame

[overdrive]

I went to school with one of the former detectives on ITV’s Vera.

I stood next to Lewis Stevenson at a gig at the Picturehiuse once (can’t remember what gig it was).

I was sent along by my school in 6th year to a community centre opening where Alex McLeish was doing the official opening. This was when he was Hibs manager. Me and a girl in my year got our photo taken with him and it appeared in the EEN. It was my birthday a few weeks later and my parents had got a print of the photo from the EEN and got it framed as part of my birthday present. The Ginger Judas Prick signed for Rangers on my birthday! My lasting memory of sitting next to him was that he was reeking of booze at 2pm in the afternoon.

[Mibbes Aye]

I used to work in a city centre hotel when I was in and out of university.

We had a function one night and Darren Jackson was there, whilst he was playing for us. He had a rather spiffing suit on as I recall.

I was behind the bar and he bought a massive round for a bunch of folk. I undercharged him hugely on the basis that he played for us. He looked a bit taken aback when I told him the cost but didn't say anything.

[James310]

I found a really old picture of a Hibs team, late 19th century I think, behind a bookcase at my school. We sent it to Hibs and they published it in the programme.

[Scouse Hibee]

As duty manager I waited to meet and greet Bob Hoskins who had booked under his own name and booked a basic room with no view. Our reservations manager had spotted this booking and upgraded him to a Castle View and left the usual VIP set up in his room of champagne, fruit, chocolates etc. When he arrived Bob Hoskins ( Yorkshire Businessman) was very appreciative of the fuss we made of him!

[danhibees1875]

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As duty manager I waited to meet and greet Bob Hoskins who had booked under his own name and booked a basic room with no view. Our reservations manager had spotted this booking and upgraded him to a Castle View and left the usual VIP set up in his room of champagne, fruit, chocolates etc. When he arrived Bob Hoskins ( Yorkshire Businessman) was very appreciative of the fuss we made of him!

I like that. Might start booking hotels under celebrity names to see if I get any upgrades!

"Hi, one double room for the Obama's please"...

[Peevemor]

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As duty manager I waited to meet and greet Bob Hoskins who had booked under his own name and booked a basic room with no view. Our reservations manager had spotted this booking and upgraded him to a Castle View and left the usual VIP set up in his room of champagne, fruit, chocolates etc. When he arrived Bob Hoskins ( Yorkshire Businessman) was very appreciative of the fuss we made of him!

I had a mate called Paul McCartney (sadly no longer with us) who had similar experiences. Among our crowd, some people called him 'Paul' and the others 'McCartney'. Our local was Leerie's on the corner of York Place and Dublin Street and one Sunday afternoon a non-local who was in with his mate to watch whatever match was on the tv overheard our conversation and asked if he was called Paul McCartney - it turned out that he was called John Lennon! It turned out to be an epic session with lines from Beatles songs being slipped into the conversation wherever possible.

[Sylar]

I once nutmegged Jamie MacDonald with a Cruyff turn before scoring a pearler into the top corner when we were at school together (he was an outfield player at that early point, and one of the best footballers in West Lothian).

I beat Paul Di Resta at go-karting once when we were at a mutual friend's birthday party (we attended the same high school).

I went for a few beers after a work event in Mountain View (California) last year, and Mark Zuckerburg was part of a large group of people at the table next to us - I never spoke to him.

When I was a student at Dundee Uni, I was out for a night out in St Andrews. It was a Tuesday or Wednesday evening and it was pretty quiet, but it was the time Prince William was studying there. 5 large guys came into the bar with earpieces in, and shortly after follows HRH and 2 friends. There were only my group of 4 in the bar at this point and the ended up sitting at the table right beside us and got chatting to us - we ended up buying each other a round. Thoroughly nice guy.

[Hibbyradge]

I'm friendly with the father of s previous coach to the Irish Olympic dressage team and I've spoken to her on the phone once.

[overdrive]

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As duty manager I waited to meet and greet Bob Hoskins who had booked under his own name and booked a basic room with no view. Our reservations manager had spotted this booking and upgraded him to a Castle View and left the usual VIP set up in his room of champagne, fruit, chocolates etc. When he arrived Bob Hoskins ( Yorkshire Businessman) was very appreciative of the fuss we made of him!

I have a mate called Andy Murray - if we are eating out we always get him to book. He is actually moderately famous in the design world so has a decent web/social media presence and he has been inundated in the last couple of weeks with emails and DMs from doctors and people giving him tips on how they managed to solve problems with their hips. A 90 year old woman even invited him to go with her to her weekly Pilates class . He also got tracked down and paid £50 by a newspaper in the run up to tennis Andy Murray’s first Wimbledon final - just to get his photo taken and give a few words on what is was like to be “Andy Murray”.

[Smartie]

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I went to school with one of the former detectives on ITV’s Vera.

I stood next to Lewis Stevenson at a gig at the Picturehiuse once (can’t remember what gig it was).

I was sent along by my school in 6th year to a community centre opening where Alex McLeish was doing the official opening. This was when he was Hibs manager. Me and a girl in my year got our photo taken with him and it appeared in the EEN. It was my birthday a few weeks later and my parents had got a print of the photo from the EEN and got it framed as part of my birthday present. The Ginger Judas Prick signed for Rangers on my birthday! My lasting memory of sitting next to him was that he was reeking of booze at 2pm in the afternoon.

This particularly bleak tale makes Watership Down seem like uplifting, light-hearted fun.

[Alfiembra]

I used to play Badminton with Mike Larnach who was better known as Davie Coopers strike partner when they both played at Clydebank, they famously put the Huns to the sword in the cup which earned Davie Cooper his move to Ibronx.
Mike had a good football career and a really nice guy to boot, played for Newcastle and Motherwell among others.

[Mango Man]

My band supported Foo Fighters guitarist, Chris Shifletts side project band called Jackson United, and also supported American band Filter at the Liquid Rooms.

Also Keith Wright presented me with a medal for my under 10s football team.

[Hibeesmad]

Once worked in a hotel and served loads of people within football. Delivered room service to Gordon Strachan and his wife, also had a long chat with Malky Mackay about football and Hibs.

[HUTCHYHIBBY]

Some people have really misunderstood the thread title.

[Hibeesmad]

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Some people have really misunderstood the thread title.

Shame

[Hiber-nation]

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Some people have really misunderstood the thread title.

What exactly is a claim to lame anyway?

[HUTCHYHIBBY]

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What exactly is a claim to lame anyway?

Ask the OP in case I provide a wrong answer.

[Scouse Hibee]

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What exactly is a claim to lame anyway?

One time I was in the checkout line
Behind Steven Seagal
Once I'm pretty sure Mr. Jonah Hill
Was in the very next bathroom stall
My best friend's brother
Well, he was an extra in Wayne's World 2
My neighbour's baby sitter
Dated three of the guys in Motley Crue
I swear Jack Nicholson
Looked right at me at a Laker's game
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
Check it out, I bought a second hand toaster
From a guy who says he knows Brad Pitt
I got me an email from the prince of Nigeria
Well, he sure sounded legit
My sister used to take piano lessons
From the second cousin of Ralph Nader
Last year I threw up in an elevator
Next to Christian Slater
Well guess what, my birthday and Kim Kardashian's
Are exactly the same
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
Once at a party, my dentist accidentally
Sneezed on Russell Crowe
I posted first in the comments
On a YouTube video
I tried to sit by Steve Buscemi
But he told me this seat's taken
I know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy
Who know a guy who knows a guy who knows Kevin Bacon
I had a car that used to belong
To Cuba Gooding Jr.'s uncle
A friend of mine in high school
Had jury duty with Art Garfunkel
One time I was staying in the same hotel
As Zooey Deschanel
I used the same napkin dispenser
As Steve Carell at a Taco Bell
I don't mean to brag but
Paul Giamatti's plumber knows me by name
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
Ow, let's get lame boys

[Greentinted]

Worked as a doorman up town in late 90s - early 2000s and had many minor celebs giving it the big-I-am and asking us to identify them (drinking in an empty head does that). Notably lame names included Gary Naysmith, Kevin James, and Craig Chalmers (who,in fairness, returned the following night sober apologising for being a dick) but the lamest in my experience was a swarthy, good looking guy who looked kind of familiar and demanded VIP treatment because he was Darius Danesh’s brother!

[Hiber-nation]

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One time I was in the checkout line
Behind Steven Seagal
Once I'm pretty sure Mr. Jonah Hill
Was in the very next bathroom stall
My best friend's brother
Well, he was an extra in Wayne's World 2
My neighbour's baby sitter
Dated three of the guys in Motley Crue
I swear Jack Nicholson
Looked right at me at a Laker's game
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
Check it out, I bought a second hand toaster
From a guy who says he knows Brad Pitt
I got me an email from the prince of Nigeria
Well, he sure sounded legit
My sister used to take piano lessons
From the second cousin of Ralph Nader
Last year I threw up in an elevator
Next to Christian Slater
Well guess what, my birthday and Kim Kardashian's
Are exactly the same
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
Once at a party, my dentist accidentally
Sneezed on Russell Crowe
I posted first in the comments
On a YouTube video
I tried to sit by Steve Buscemi
But he told me this seat's taken
I know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy
Who know a guy who knows a guy who knows Kevin Bacon
I had a car that used to belong
To Cuba Gooding Jr.'s uncle
A friend of mine in high school
Had jury duty with Art Garfunkel
One time I was staying in the same hotel
As Zooey Deschanel
I used the same napkin dispenser
As Steve Carell at a Taco Bell
I don't mean to brag but
Paul Giamatti's plumber knows me by name
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
Ow, let's get lame boys

Cheers, unsurprisingly I hadn't heard of that!

[Hibbyradge]

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One time I was in the checkout line
Behind Steven Seagal
Once I'm pretty sure Mr. Jonah Hill
Was in the very next bathroom stall
My best friend's brother
Well, he was an extra in Wayne's World 2
My neighbour's baby sitter
Dated three of the guys in Motley Crue
I swear Jack Nicholson
Looked right at me at a Laker's game
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
Check it out, I bought a second hand toaster
From a guy who says he knows Brad Pitt
I got me an email from the prince of Nigeria
Well, he sure sounded legit
My sister used to take piano lessons
From the second cousin of Ralph Nader
Last year I threw up in an elevator
Next to Christian Slater
Well guess what, my birthday and Kim Kardashian's
Are exactly the same
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
Once at a party, my dentist accidentally
Sneezed on Russell Crowe
I posted first in the comments
On a YouTube video
I tried to sit by Steve Buscemi
But he told me this seat's taken
I know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy
Who know a guy who knows a guy who knows Kevin Bacon
I had a car that used to belong
To Cuba Gooding Jr.'s uncle
A friend of mine in high school
Had jury duty with Art Garfunkel
One time I was staying in the same hotel
As Zooey Deschanel
I used the same napkin dispenser
As Steve Carell at a Taco Bell
I don't mean to brag but
Paul Giamatti's plumber knows me by name
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
I got a lame
Lame claim to fame
Ow, let's get lame boys

Weird.

[The Modfather]

I met Carola, Sweden’s Eurovision winner in 1991 in Oslo when I was there for the Scotland game under Burley. She was just a pretty blonde, who grow on trees out there, wasn’t until locals we got chatting to told me who she was. Even then, meh! Strangely enough then met Dermot O’Leary outside the same pub.

[matty_f]

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I met Carola, Sweden’s Eurovision winner in 1991 in Oslo when I was there for the Scotland game under Burley. She was just a pretty blonde, who grow on trees out there, wasn’t until locals we got chatting to told me who she was. Even then, meh! Strangely enough then met Dermot O’Leary outside the same pub.

I once quoted the post of guy who'd met Dermot O'Leary outside a pub.

[Hibbyradge]

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I once quoted the post of guy who'd met Dermot O'Leary outside a pub.

That's a good one, but I thought it was me that was bored!

[The Modfather]

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I once quoted the post of guy who'd met Dermot O'Leary outside a pub.

If you want a signed photo of the guy who met Dermot O’Leary send me a PM 😀

[Pedantic_Hibee]

I once stood no further than five yards away from Tony Drago.

[Hibbyradge]

I'm only 5 steps from Kevin Bacon.

5.

[Saturday Boy]

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I'm only 5 steps from Kevin Bacon.

5.

But only 3 from streaky bacon.

I take it that you’re still bored 😄

I used to work beside a girl who’s big sister dated Zoltan Varga.

Even I think that’s pretty lame.