Most Embarrassing Self-Pitying Club In Scotland

[Dashing Bob S]

A two horse race once again, I'm afraid, between the current Statement table leaders and the kings of the quality statement.

[Bostonhibby]

The team formerly known as Glasgow rangers are clear winners here surely.

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[Geo_1875]

The statements from Dr Budge, while works of literary fiction to match anything from Jakey Rowling, lack the precise, almost legalese, pompousity of those emanating from Level 5.

[BH Hibs]

And the NEW Roaster Champions of the World........ Sevcoooohhhhhh

[lord bunberry]

While I have the utmost respect for what hearts have achieved in the statement league this season, I feel that the hun has produced that wee bit more quality when it comes to others laughing at them.

[Clerie Green]

Choices , choices. Full fat or diet !

[One Day Soon]

There's just no contest here.

With Hearts you get the impression that the statements are genuinely trying to explain (badly) what they are doing, despite the fact that they are usually just pish filled nonsense which are almost routinely contradicted by subsequent events.

With The Rangers it seems like the statements are becoming a substitute for the football itself.

Could they become Scottish footballs's first wholly virtual club? I suppose they already are after they went out of existence...

[Hermit Crab]

One person voted for Hearts!

[jacomo]

Just can’t see past Sevco for this one.

Both produce cringeworthy and hilarious missives, but the bigots from Govan have unbeatable amounts of self-pity mixed with underlying menace.

[GreenLake]

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The statements from Dr Budge, while works of literary fiction to match anything from Jakey Rowling, lack the precise, almost legalese, pompousity of those emanating from Level 5.

I know her PhD was honorary and not a real one, but if she had done a PhD what would her Thesis be titled?

A few suggestions to start:

"Essays on Compound Interest."
"Euro Area Imbalances: Three Essays on Offshoring, Expenditure Growth and Expenditure Switching." (this is a real title)
"New Empirical Methods and Approaches to Profiting from Non-Profit Foundations."
"Novel Methods in Equity Retention."
"A Computer Analysis of Football Played in the Cloud."

[NZ Green]

Hearts have too much of an ego to feel self pity. The Rangers are just on a next level, its like watching a 15 year old square-going a bouncer because he wouldn't accept his fake ID.

[Deansy]

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The statements from Dr Budge, while works of literary fiction to match anything from Jakey Rowling, lack the precise, almost legalese, pompousity of those emanating from Level 5.

At least Budge has the bottle to put her name to their statements - the unsigned ones from Greyskull reflect their cowardly nature !

[Pretty Boy]

It's not even a contest.

Yet again Hearts are proven to be a 'big team' only in their own heads and lack the ability to really compete for titles.

Rangers win by a country mile.

[JeMeSouviens]

I would've thought Rangers would push Sevco quite close, albeit they're dead.

[Clerie Green]

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Hearts have too much of an ego to feel self pity. The Rangers are just on a next level, its like watching a 15 year old square-going a bouncer because he wouldn't accept his fake ID.

Very succinctly put .

[Bostonhibby]

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I know her PhD was honorary and not a real one, but if she had done a PhD what would her Thesis be titled?

A few suggestions to start:

"Essays on Compound Interest."
"Euro Area Imbalances: Three Essays on Offshoring, Expenditure Growth and Expenditure Switching." (this is a real title)
"New Empirical Methods and Approaches to Profiting from Non-Profit Foundations."
"Novel Methods in Equity Retention."
"A Computer Analysis of Football Played in the Cloud."

Beating inflation by investing in captive bonds:A win/win.

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[Stantons Angel]

At least you can read and understand what mrs budge is trying to get over to her support Whether its true or not is another question.

Rangers, well there is no contest as far as i am concerned! The statement last night must have come from the half brained nit wit who wrote the statement after the cup final.

Its as if its been written by a bairn and to use the phrase "beggars belief" in a statement issued on a business matter is really laughable.

I couldnt stop thinking about it last night, if i used a phrase like that when writing letters or emails at work, id be told off!

They are so wronged against and yet they lavish such filth and venom on the game we all love. The undercurrent of it all was threatening to sort us out when they have to give us tickets next season.......

the most laughable thing is the passage on their fans safety in that corner of the south stand? If they want to ensure fans safety they should come sit with me in that corner of the broomloan stand and they will find fear and intimidation in abundance.

When Leeanne saw this statement i bet there was a big smile on her face. They can no longer intimidate clubs or push their wishes on us they are so unpopular that it just seems to go right over their heads.

These loyal fans of theirs walked away and let their club die......... most of them are not football people and exist because of the vile sectarianism that they are brought up in. These are ways and traditions that should have been left behind centuries ago!

It will make a pleasant change that during the game we wont have to endure 90 mins of sectarian songs. That only leaves their rule brittania to sing to us...... they do not have a football song to their name!

The one thing i hope for is that those who have shouted for the south stand to be opened get off their bums and buy those tickets!

[Dalianwanda]

No contest...Budge blethers some rubbish but it terms of deluded, arrogant, embarassing, shreaking, bombastic, callow, uncouth idiocy....we have only one winner.

[Baader]

Sevco actually win something here.

[Keith_M]

Sorry but Hearts are nowhere near the top of this particular league table.

The Zombie Bigots have this one totally sown up.

[Alex Trager]

As of the 13th of April. So needs updated. @elgubbz

[Green_one]

This poll beggars belief.

I bet a blue pound Sevco win . Can we use Rangers maths to decide which vote is bigger.

Hearts are no even trying to win.

[Sir David Gray]

The zombies win this at a canter.

It's not even close.

[danhibees1875]

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As of the 13th of April. So needs updated. @elgubbz

Hearts dominating the league table but rangers now in a European spot on beggers belief difference.

[SideBurns]

Bigots Beggars Belief club win hands doon over the Jambos in this one. Pathetic, hateful mob

[Jack Hackett]

This particular club's supporter says only one possible winner

[NAE NOOKIE]

New Huns by a mile .... The Hertz stuff is fanciful, often delusional and a wee bit sad at times. Sevco's stuff is dangerous in that it panders to the lowest common denominator of their support and stokes the fires of hatred and bigotry ... its a wonder they don't just put Fenian bassas refuse to remember their place on their website and be done with it.

[monktonharp]

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Bigots Beggars Belief club win hands doon over the Jambos in this one. Pathetic, hateful mob

Like your style, with this one BBBC the new institution to be in awe of.

[Ozyhibby]

Do we get bonus points for being the subject of most of Sevco’s statements?


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[Dashing Bob S]

Huns statements qualitatively better and could still catch Yams by issuing a late rash of statements:

- Why Gerard won’t be manager but it’s nothing to do with him rejecting them
- Why Gerard won’t be manager but it’s nothing to do with him being a catholic
- Why Rangers fans caused trouble and sang sectarian songs at ER but it was all to do with Hibs goading ticket arrangements

Any others?