Our boss has a genetic eye disorder that means his sight is continuously deteriorating, he's also a complete ****er. Our young pilots have now started calling him T-Rex because they've figured out if they stand really still then he won't notice them.
Used to have a mate that we called PF which stood for 'phantom ****'.
Almost every time we went out he would supposedly get a phone call about 11.30 from 'some bird' who was apparently 'gagging for it'. His flatmate confirmed that on most of these ocassions he would pitch up at home less than half an hour after leaving us. He either had a few issues in the bedroom or he was at it.