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  1. #1
    Scottish Cup Victory - Witness 2016 Scouse Hibee's Avatar
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    Excuses for being late/missing a shift

    Was having a conversation with a mate about the various excuses we have heard from people we have managed over the years. Here's a few, what other have you had?

    Girlfriend locked me in the house and took my keys with her.

    Wife used all my petrol so had to leave car and get the bus.

    I misread the rota.

    My (insert any relative) took ill and I had to go and see them.

    The bus was cancelled on my route.

    My (insert any pet) was ill.

    My parrot escaped.

    I had the flu (for one day)

    We had no hot water/heating so I couldn't shower.

    My car was blocked in.

    I stopped to help an OAP on the way to work.

    While some of these may sound credible, some people amazingly had the same experience several times over the years :-)


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  3. #2
    @hibs.net private member McD's Avatar
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    Had these ones, some quite recently:

    - I broke my car key in the car door so couldn't come in

    - my pal took ill last night and I had to take her to A&E, and my phone battery died (this one came at around 13:30 when the person should have started at 8:30)

    - I've got a coursework to do for uni so I'll not be in

    - no one could pick me up (when queried about a bus, gave a look like we'd asked them to lick clean the toilet bowl)

    - I'm hungover and can't drive

    - been locked in the house

    - can't leave the house as I don't have a key

    - I couldn't get parked so I went back home

  4. #3
    First Team Breakthrough
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    My gran needed a prescription and the chemist didn't open until 9.30am. 🙄

  5. #4
    @hibs.net private member Mon Dieu4's Avatar
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    I tore my cruciate at wrestling school yesterday and won't be in today guy came in the next day with a slight limp, now I've torn my cruciate before and don't think my questions helped the matter any

  6. #5
    @hibs.net private member Hermit Crab's Avatar
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    Three of the best I've ever heard at my place of work over 16 years.

    1, I can't come to work because i can't stop sneezing. (but I haven't sneezed during the phone call)

    2, Person phoning in sick says the following on the phone - I'm phoning from my bed, a tree has fallen through my roof and pinned me to my bed so I won't make it in today. Yes, incredible as it sounds that was the excuse they used.

    3, There was road works outside my house so I couldn't sleep so I'm going back to bed.


  7. #6
    @hibs.net private member danhibees1875's Avatar
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    The masters went to sudden death and i slept through my alarms...
    Mon the Hibs.

  8. #7
    First Team Breakthrough
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    Quote Originally Posted by danhibees1875 View Post
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    The masters went to sudden death and i slept through my alarms...
    I'm using that tomorrow. 😊

  9. #8
    Have to say, I have been 'late' before because I couldn't find my keys to get out.

    Didn't really matter though because I didn't have a set start time as such, I was just later than I usually came in.

  10. #9
    @hibs.net private member Greentinted's Avatar
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    My Granny died this morning...


    ...used 4 times in less than 3 months by the same person!

  11. #10
    @hibs.net private member sleeping giant's Avatar
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    I had a meeting in Burnley and set off early doors.
    Got as far as Annandale water and stopped for a coffee. Noticed I needed fuel and also noticed I had left my wallet in the house.
    So I had to call the customer and say I'd left my wallet.


    Now , booked this customer in for a few weeks later an off I went . Stopped at Annandale water for a coffee and filled up with fuel only to notice that I had the wrong wallet and I had already filled up. Had to go in and grovel with the guy and go back a week later to pay.
    No Eternal Reward Shall Forgive Us Now For Wasting The Dawn

  12. #11
    Coaching Staff Dunbar Hibee's Avatar
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    My mother had to phone my work last year and inform them I was AWOL in Copenhagen! Still get the pish ripped out of me to this day

  13. #12
    Licence to swagger. .Sean.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dunbar Hibee View Post
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    My mother had to phone my work last year and inform them I was AWOL in Copenhagen! Still get the pish ripped out of me to this day
    Ma boy, good times 😂😂😂😂
    ''It's always been just part of the culture. Growing up, for most working-class kids, is all about football, music or clothes. You might not have much money, but whatever you have got, you're going to look good.'' - Paul Weller

  14. #13
    Got sunburn on my foot can't get my shoes on so won't be in today

  15. #14
    My favourite was when I was working in a hotel and our uniform policy was well polished black shoes. Guy due in for a breakfast service at 6am phoned to say he couldn't come in as his shoes were scuffed, he had run out of shoe polish and his local Tesco didn't open until 8 on a Sunday.

    Another guy phoned to say he'd be late because he'd slept in, had been rushing to the bus stop and because of that he was sweating and his shirt was sticking to him so he had to go home and have another shower and changd.
    I fell in love with football as I was later to fall in love with women,. Suddenly, uncritically giving no thought to the pain it could bring. - Nick Hornby

  16. #15
    My brother went to his van laddies door only to be told he couldn't come to work because his brother got up first and was away out wearing THE shoes.

  17. #16
    Testimonial Due LustForLeith's Avatar
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    In a place I used to work one guy couldn't make it in as there was a ghost in his living room and so where the keys to lock his house. He was too scared to get the keys so took the day off.

    Fought it that it couldn't be proven ghosts existed.

  18. #17
    Private Members Prediction League Winner Hibrandenburg's Avatar
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    My kids didn't come to school because I got a good deal at Euro Disney.

  19. #18
    First Team Breakthrough
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hibrandenburg View Post
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    My kids didn't come to school because I got a good deal at Euro Disney.
    Boom boom!

  20. #19
    @hibs.net private member Peevemor's Avatar
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    One of my colleagues recently missed a morning's work because he had to recover an ageing aunt who, in a lapse of lucidity, drove past the supermarket (her intended destination) and simply kept going until she ran out of petrol - about 80 miles away.

    She's no longer allowed to drive.

  21. #20
    @hibs.net private member TRC's Avatar
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    Working in pubs you always get a few crackers.

    One of my favourites was my best friend broke up with her girlfriend so I have to be there for her. Not so funny but the reason she had broken up with this girl was because of the 'friend'. Started laughing down the phone. she came in the next day all smiles till she got put on bar backing duty.

    I hate the sick voice as well does my head in you know the one the feeble little cowering voice that sounds like they are 96 and about to draw their last breath.

  22. #21
    @hibs.net private member Hermit Crab's Avatar
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    Some belters on here!

  23. #22
    Testimonial Due Future17's Avatar
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    A guy I went to school with was late almost every morning and used to arrive in his first class of the day with an assortment of excuses on his late slip. My favourite was "helped old lady with shopping".

  24. #23
    @hibs.net private member Hiber-nation's Avatar
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    A lassie who was on her final sick leave warning.

    Her "Hi. You know how I said I'd be in Ayrshire at the weekend?"
    Me "Yeah..."
    Her "Well I'm still here, the car broke down and we're waiting for someone to fix it"
    Me "But I drove past you on Slateford Road yesterday...."
    Her "Errrm...oh errrm yeah, we errmmm... had to come home and went back again...."

    That was after 5 deid grannies in a year.

  25. #24
    First Team Breakthrough Neil4Hibs's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Greentinted View Post
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    My Granny died this morning...


    ...used 4 times in less than 3 months by the same person!
    I once had an employee who took a week off when his brother died, and another week when his mum died a few weeks later. He left us, and about a year later I had an agency call me to discuss him in relation to a position he had applied for. They asked if I had experienced any reliability issues, to which I said yes. They told me his last employer had also mentioned it, but that his brother and mother had unfortunately died while he was with them. I told the agency they had also died while he was with us!

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