Depression and anxiety

[WhileTheChief..]

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tl;dr - spending less, working less, reading more, exercising more and generally feeling better mentally and physically for it.

All the best everyone

What a fantastic post. Really enjoyed reading that as I could relate to so much of it.

I made similar changes this year although not to the same extent. Feels good.

[wookie70]

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Benign compared to others posting here but need to share it somewhere

Struggled a bit recently. Started on the descent of a munro when my body started to shut down and I realised just how unfit I actually am.

Can't shake this negative feeling I have. And it's spanning across most elements of life. Mostly just that I'm "OK"

I'm an OK dad, my girls adore me bur I could be much better. I'm husband, I'm OK at my job but have become extremely lazy and procrastinate so much productivity is fallen off a cliff. I'm an OK son, I'm an OK mate.

I struggle with back pain and extremely low energy levels at times and really find it difficult to get motivated or move when it becomes sore. Dome physio and other treatment but mentally always struggle if something doesn't make improvements within a couple of weeks

Sorry for the rant, I don't think I'd do anything too rash, I love my kids far too much but it just really drains me to the point where I think, well what is the point?

I suffer from quite similar feelings and quite a bit of your post rings true for me. My mate told me about a condition called imposter syndrome. When I read about it I would say I fitted quite a fair few of the descriptions. I had some counselling through my work pre covid and part of the discussion was around me not engaging with things unless I thought I could do them perfectly. Another way of looking at that would be to say that OK, for me, was not enough. That is of course not true and OK is nearly always enough and is often far better than OK from another perspective. I quite often think back to those counselling sessions and remind myself to not beat myself up so hard, don't worry if it never turned out exactly as you hoped and generally try to like yourself a bit more. I listen to myself more often than not these days but when I was struggling that counsellor made a big difference in a short time to my mental health.

The fitness part is something worth considering. When lockdown happened I did Couch to 5 K and loads of walking and gardening etc. I lost 2 stone and was the fittest I had been in years. All of a sudden my mental health issues disappeared. Unfortunately, they all came back, with the belly, when I returned to work. I know that where I work makes me unwell. It is a decent job on decent pay but I loath working there and feel trapped financially. No fault of that is my employers by the way just 30 odd years of me not liking what I do and beating myself up for not having the courage to leave. I'll suffer it for a few years and then retirement options and a more positive future will hopefully be within grasp.

Your paragraph around being an OK Dad, Son and parent is exactly how I feel about myself. The thing is that there are many roles there and if you are doing OK in them all that is a pretty decent accomplishment in itself. I suggest that your girls love for you says you are doing far better in the parenting stakes than OK. Hope you feel better soon and thanks for your post. It is always helpful to know that you aren't in a wee bubble and the thoughts you have are shared by others.

[CropleyWasGod]

For those of you who struggle with SAD, Happy Solstice. The days get longer from here on in :)

[Green Man]

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For those of you who struggle with SAD, Happy Solstice. The days get longer from here on in :)

One of my favourite days of the year. I hate how early night falls at the moment so it’s always nice to see that time getting a wee bit later each day until we reach the point where it’s still daylight when I finish work.

[CropleyWasGod]

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One of my favourite days of the year. I hate how early night falls at the moment so it’s always nice to see that time getting a wee bit later each day until we reach the point where it’s still daylight when I finish work.

😀

Possibly for another thread, but for me today is a big part of what my Christmas is about.

[Sylar]

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😀

Possibly for another thread, but for me today is a big part of what my Christmas is about.

I'm the same - I feel I've almost become pagan in my ageing years, as that celebration of a return to the light is most welcome.

I personally can't wait to see the back of Christmas - don't get me wrong, I'll enjoy seeing the children enjoy it all, but I can't quite stomach all of the expectation and pressure to be 'on'.

[grunt]

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I'm the same - I feel I've almost become pagan in my ageing years, as that celebration of a return to the light is most welcome.

Checks age in profile ...

I've got tins of soup older than you!

[CropleyWasGod]

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I'm the same - I feel I've almost become pagan in my ageing years, as that celebration of a return to the light is most welcome.

I personally can't wait to see the back of Christmas - don't get me wrong, I'll enjoy seeing the children enjoy it all, but I can't quite stomach all of the expectation and pressure to be 'on'.

As one of my favourite memes at this time of year puts it....

Get naked, drink mead and party like a pagan, because queuing at Argos is just bollocks.

[Itsnoteasy]

One of my best mates just found in Holyrood Park. Robert Corner 50 year old. Suspected suicide. No signs what so ever. Good Hibby. Would give you his last £.


Lying in my bed numb & heartbroken

[DaveF]

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One of my best mates just found in Holyrood Park. Robert Corner 50 year old. Suspected suicide. No signs what so ever. Good Hibby. Would give you his last £.


Lying in my bed numb & heartbroken

It's absolutely devastating. As you said, he was one of life's good guys and it's difficult to take this in 😪

[Santa Cruz]

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One of my best mates just found in Holyrood Park. Robert Corner 50 year old. Suspected suicide. No signs what so ever. Good Hibby. Would give you his last £.


Lying in my bed numb & heartbroken

I found out earlier. I grew up with Robert, he helped me many times. Sometimes he didn't even know, he could just make me laugh, he had that ability to light up a room. I don't trust many people, but would have trusted him with my life. I'm absolutely devestated. Heartbroken for his family.

[stu in nottingham]

Such sad news to read here today. My condolences to Robert's family and friends and all who knew him, so tragic. God bless him.

If anyone should need someone to talk to about Robert. I am here.

Rest in Peace lad.

[Itsnoteasy]

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Such sad news to read here today. My condolences to Robert's family and friends and all who knew him, so tragic. God bless him.

If anyone should need someone to talk to about Robert. I am here.

Rest in Peace lad.

That's so kind of you. What I can't understand is someone showing no signs of mental health, money worries or health issues can do this. He was at the Livi game, went for a pint with one of our other mates. Walked his dog on boxing day with Davey F brother. Then never to be seen again.

[stu in nottingham]

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That's so kind of you. What I can't understand is someone showing no signs of mental health, money worries or health issues can do this. He was at the Livi game, went for a pint with one of our other mates. Walked his dog on boxing day with Davey F brother. Then never to be seen again.

It can be so difficult to understand, I know. It helps to know that people who take their own life do not necessarily want to die. I know that sounds contradictory but the vast majority of people just want the feelings they're having to stop or they want their situation to change as they are not coping with it and suicide presents itself as a 'solution'.

Some, but by no means all, have struggled with their mental health but felt unable to talk about it. People don't always show signs of their suicidal feelings and it can be difficult to spot.

I'm very sorry for the loss of your friend.

Look after each other folks.

[Itsnoteasy]

Went to see his wife of 25 years last night. Very difficult but glad I done it.

R.I.P Rab

[LewysGot2]

A tough time of year for a lot of people. The need to engage with the propaganda of this supposedly being the most wonderful time of the year is stressful for many. Finances, social anxiety, relationship strains, dark days, long nights and miserable weather meet our national fixation with alcohol. Its little wonder many just don't cope.

Sorry for your loss 🙏

[LustForLeith]

The Changing Room is back at Hibernian Community Foundation for 2023!

Last season’s highlights include a drop-in by John ‘Yogi’ Hughes who spoke honestly about his life and career in Scottish football

We'd love for you to join us. Simply drop us an email at thechangingroom@samh.org.uk

It’s free, safe, confidential and gives men the chance to tackle their mental health through football

[Santa Cruz]

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The Changing Room is back at Hibernian Community Foundation for 2023!

Last season’s highlights include a drop-in by John ‘Yogi’ Hughes who spoke honestly about his life and career in Scottish football

We'd love for you to join us. Simply drop us an email at thechangingroom@samh.org.uk

It’s free, safe, confidential and gives men the chance to tackle their mental health through football

I think this is a great service you provide. I'd imagine having someone relatable like Yogi popping in maybe provided a temporary but welcome distraction for the group, hopefully provided a few wee laughs at appropriate moments too.

I often hear more about men's mental health struggles being promoted (presuming here with nothing to base it on) is this is because there's an assumption female's are more inclined to talk openly? Just curious, was wondering if you knew.

[Stairway 2 7]

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I think this is a great service you provide. I'd imagine having someone relatable like Yogi popping in maybe provided a temporary but welcome distraction for the group, hopefully provided a few wee laughs at appropriate moments too.

I often hear more about men's mental health struggles being promoted (presuming here with nothing to base it on) is this is because there's an assumption female's are more inclined to talk openly? Just curious, was wondering if you knew.

Might be because males are 3 to 4 times more likely to commit suicide, but that's a guess. You could be right that traditionally men don't talk as much, all this "man up" pish is toxic. Hopefully things are changing, but I'd read suicides were up a good amount last year sadly

[Itsnoteasy]

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Might be because males are 3 to 4 times more likely to commit suicide, but that's a guess. You could be right that traditionally men don't talk as much, all this "man up" pish is toxic. Hopefully things are changing, but I'd read suicides were up a good amount last year sadly

Suicide is the biggest killer of men under 50s.

[stu in nottingham]

According to data published by Samaritans, 2021 figures for England showed a 10.5 per 100,000 suicide rate as compared to 10.0 in 2020 and 10.8 in 2019. By gender, males were 15.8 and females 5.5 in 2021. The most at-risk group were males 50-54 at 22.5 per 100.000.

By comparison, Scotland's figures indicated an overall suicide rate in 2021 of 14.0 per 100,000 despite a drop from the previous year. Gender differences are similar to England but with an upward trend for female suicides.

The leading cause of suicide is considered to be untreated depression whilst reticence in talking is undoubtedly an exacerbating factor for greater completed male suicides.

Risk factors are many and disparate. Some of these are, substance use, family history of suicide, experiencing others' suicidal behaviour, physical or sexual abuse, deprivation and chronic pain.

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The Changing Room is back at Hibernian Community Foundation for 2023!

Last season’s highlights include a drop-in by John ‘Yogi’ Hughes who spoke honestly about his life and career in Scottish football

We'd love for you to join us. Simply drop us an email at thechangingroom@samh.org.uk

It’s free, safe, confidential and gives men the chance to tackle their mental health through football

Fantastic stuff, proud of you all mate. If you ever need a hand just shout.

[Santa Cruz]

Thanks for info. Found a breakdown of the latest stats (2021) for Scotland.

https://www.scotpho.org.uk/health-we...de/key-points/

[stu in nottingham]

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Thanks for info. Found a breakdown of the latest stats (2021) for Scotland.

https://www.scotpho.org.uk/health-we...de/key-points/

Thanks SC, that's also the source Samaritans gave their report for Scotland from. They pose many questions.

[hibsbollah]

Worry a read as to why such an on the surface pointless activity gives us emotional balance.

https://www.theguardian.com/football...-mental-health

[DaveF]

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I found out earlier. I grew up with Robert, he helped me many times. Sometimes he didn't even know, he could just make me laugh, he had that ability to light up a room. I don't trust many people, but would have trusted him with my life. I'm absolutely devestated. Heartbroken for his family.

FYI.

The funeral is at Morton hall on Friday 3rd February at 2pm.

[Santa Cruz]

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FYI.

The funeral is at Morton hall on Friday 3rd February at 2pm.

Thanks Dave. Unfortunately due to personal health circumstances I won't be able to manage Robert's funeral.

Went to church, lit a candle, said a wee prayer. Did the same for his Dad when he passed away. Robert told me it meant a lot to him, so I tried to take comfort from that. Neither of us kept up going to Mass from since we were younger, but I feel a calmness when I go. I don't sit for the service, just light candles, say prayers for others and leave.

I've been thinking of him often, come on here to distract my mind doing word games etc. I'm sure the family will make the funeral a lovely celebration of his life for him. He will be sorely missed. I'll never forget him. May he RIP.

[DaveF]

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Thanks Dave. Unfortunately due to personal health circumstances I won't be able to manage Robert's funeral.

Went to church, lit a candle, said a wee prayer. Did the same for his Dad when he passed away. Robert told me it meant a lot to him, so I tried to take comfort from that. Neither of us kept up going to Mass from since we were younger, but I feel a calmness when I go. I don't sit for the service, just light candles, say prayers for others and leave.

I've been thinking of him often, come on here to distract my mind doing word games etc. I'm sure the family will make the funeral a lovely celebration of his life for him. He will be sorely missed. I'll never forget him. May he RIP.

I don't know you, but thank you. Very kind words.

[Itsnoteasy]

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I found out earlier. I grew up with Robert, he helped me many times. Sometimes he didn't even know, he could just make me laugh, he had that ability to light up a room. I don't trust many people, but would have trusted him with my life. I'm absolutely devestated. Heartbroken for his family.

Rab didn't realise how many people loved & cared for him. Your not the only one to have trusted him with your life. Such a humble guy.
I never even felt like this when my dad passed away. I am heartbroken.

R I P My Bonnie Laddie
I will miss you forever

[CropleyWasGod]

Just listened to this podcast, which talks about regulating cortisol levels in order to control stress and anxiety.

https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vaHViZXJtYW5sYW I/episode/NmEwYzg1YmUtOTIxNC0xMWVkLTlhYTctOTdlOWY0MzY4Njc1?e p=14

I was particularly interested in what he says about ashwagandha, which I use regularly. Turns out I might be better taking twice as much as I do :)

Anyone any experience with it?

[CropleyWasGod]

I know that some on here are interested in the use of psychedelics in dealing with mental health issues.

A friend of mine has arranged this event, to discuss exactly that, with a Parliamentary event immediately afterwards.

https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/psych...s-512018159097