Depression and anxiety

[lord bunberry]

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Cottage garden? I've hit a ball or 2 into there from the third tee at prestonfield

HH and LB if you haven't yet I would recommend exploring the old railway paths that link warriston and bonnington with Leith and Granton and all the way to roseburn. A great way to explore the north of the city.

I used to cycle along there everyday when I worked in gorgie.

[Mr White]

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I used to cycle along there everyday when I worked in gorgie.

I bet you were happier on the return journey each day

[lord bunberry]

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I bet you were happier on the return journey each day

I used to get home much quicker than I arrived

[Mikey09]

My wife works with dementia patients and puts on different themed days for them to trigger memories. I took this on and use the idea in a way when I'm having a bad time. Anyone can do it to suit there needs. I maybe watch an old comedian I loved, or an old episode of only fools and horses. You can go further back and watch your favourite cartoon when you were a kid. Listening to the first band that triggered your love of music. A book you read as a teenager. There is nothing embarrassing about doing any of this. It works wonders for me so I do it. When I started feeling brutal I used to lock myself away from everyone and wait on it passing... Now I do something, like what I've wrote, to help. Getting out is even better. I remember one particular time I felt crap we packed some sandwiches and headed off to The Whitadder in the Lammermuir hills with the dog. Used to go there as a kid and when we got home I felt great. To me triggers can bring on my bipolar, however they can also level me out as well. Thanks. Mikey...

[CropleyWasGod]

This is my favourite thread on Hibs.net.

The opportunity for men to talk about emotional problems, in relative confidence, and without judgement, is a wonderful example of the positive power of social media.

[Mikey09]

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This is my favourite thread on Hibs.net.

The opportunity for men to talk about emotional problems, in relative confidence, and without judgement, is a wonderful example of the positive power of social media.

Absolutely CWG. Every football forum should have a thread like this. It could be the start of help and recovery for people who need it. It's also humbling and inspiring.

[CropleyWasGod]

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Absolutely CWG. Every football forum should have a thread like this. It could be the start of help and recovery for people who need it. It's also humbling and inspiring.

For every person who has posted on here, I reckon there will be another 3 or 4 who don't feel ready to talk....but who, hopefully, will be getting something from it.

[MSK]

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My wife works with dementia patients and puts on different themed days for them to trigger memories. I took this on and use the idea in a way when I'm having a bad time. Anyone can do it to suit there needs. I maybe watch an old comedian I loved, or an old episode of only fools and horses. You can go further back and watch your favourite cartoon when you were a kid. Listening to the first band that triggered your love of music. A book you read as a teenager. There is nothing embarrassing about doing any of this. It works wonders for me so I do it. When I started feeling brutal I used to lock myself away from everyone and wait on it passing... Now I do something, like what I've wrote, to help. Getting out is even better. I remember one particular time I felt crap we packed some sandwiches and headed off to The Whitadder in the Lammermuir hills with the dog. Used to go there as a kid and when we got home I felt great. To me triggers can bring on my bipolar, however they can also level me out as well. Thanks. Mikey...

A couple of years back when I worked at the Royal Edinburgh I bumped into an old acquaintance from the bowling club. He was in a very emotional state, his Wife was in the Jardine clinic dementia ward & whenever he went to visit her she just didn't relate to him. After being with her for over 50 years he was heart broken to see her sit with a blank stare. He would often sit for hours talking to her but he just wanted her to relate to something he was saying, something to acknowledge their love, their relationship/companionship, their hobbies, holidays or kids. He understood her condition & he understood that she wouldn't have long to live but he just wanted one lasting moment with her.

As simple as it sounds, I suggested he wore his white bowling jersey, it had a wee symbol of a bowl on it. Both were excellent bowlers & won many tournaments together. A couple of weeks later I spoke to him in the grounds of the hospital, he was in a much happier mood & explained that when he wore his bowling jersey his Wifes face lit up, she pointed to the wee bowling symbol on his jersey, smiled, uttered a few words & embraced him. That contact, as minimal as it was, was the connection he had yearned for, a lasting memory of the Wife, life long companion, mother of his children, he loved, adored & treasured.

She sadly passed a couple of months later.

[CropleyWasGod]

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I've got a query regarding prescriptions. My GP refuses to change my medication without the consultant giving it the go ahead so I tried a different GP a few times and they all say they "can't" change meds. Is this really the case? It was my understanding that the Psychiatrist was there to guide and give advice to doctors, not dictate to them?

Sorry, this got missed, so bumping it in case someone knows the answer.

The cynic in me says that everyone in the medical profession is scared of being sued, hence the reluctance to go against someone else's advice.

But... I really don't know. Maybe someone out there does.

[HUTCHYHIBBY]

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This is my favourite thread on Hibs.net.

The opportunity for men to talk about emotional problems, in relative confidence, and without judgement, is a wonderful example of the positive power of social media.

It certainly puts a lot of the nonsense posted elsewhere on here into some perspective.

[Keith_M]

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This is my favourite thread on Hibs.net.

The opportunity for men to talk about emotional problems, in relative confidence, and without judgement, is a wonderful example of the positive power of social media.

Totally agree and I for one am grateful to everybody on here for both giving the subject the seriousness it deserves and also for the many posts giving advice and understanding.

[McD]

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My wife works with dementia patients and puts on different themed days for them to trigger memories. I took this on and use the idea in a way when I'm having a bad time. Anyone can do it to suit there needs. I maybe watch an old comedian I loved, or an old episode of only fools and horses. You can go further back and watch your favourite cartoon when you were a kid. Listening to the first band that triggered your love of music. A book you read as a teenager. There is nothing embarrassing about doing any of this. It works wonders for me so I do it. When I started feeling brutal I used to lock myself away from everyone and wait on it passing... Now I do something, like what I've wrote, to help. Getting out is even better. I remember one particular time I felt crap we packed some sandwiches and headed off to The Whitadder in the Lammermuir hills with the dog. Used to go there as a kid and when we got home I felt great. To me triggers can bring on my bipolar, however they can also level me out as well. Thanks. Mikey...

Wonderful advice Mikey, if only one person is helped then it's all credit to you my friend, something I will try when I'm feeling in a crappy place, cheers

[Pretty Boy]

Good to see this thread bumped again.

Truth be told I've been having an utterly ***** time of it the last few weeks. Contrary to most people who's depression and anxiety tends to get worse in the winter I tend to get worse in the summer. My hayfever and asthma plays up in the summer and that leads to my mind running away and imagining my symptoms are something far more serious than they are. I came close having my first full blown panic attack in about 2 years in Tesco a couple of weeks back, dropped my basket and ran out the door as I was sure I was going to faint and couldn't breathe, just about managed to get it under control. I've also been really short with people and become far more argumentative than usual which is always a sure sign I'm struggling a bit. This all leads to me getting very frustrated with myself and that in turn makes me more anxious which makes me frustrated again and so the circle goes on. I've also been a bit paranoid about people hiding things from me or lying to me which isn't unusual but has been under control for a long while.

As well as the above mentioned problem with my mind running away with itself regarding my hayfever and illness we have also been dealing with a family illness that has been very stressful for everyone and work has been tough lately as well. I've tried to keep busy, walked 20+ miles last weekend and climbed 2 Munros and forced myself to the Scottish Open this weekend. Trying to keep active as the urge to just lie about feeling sorry for myself is strong but I know it's unhelpful.

[Mikey09]

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A couple of years back when I worked at the Royal Edinburgh I bumped into an old acquaintance from the bowling club. He was in a very emotional state, his Wife was in the Jardine clinic dementia ward & whenever he went to visit her she just didn't relate to him. After being with her for over 50 years he was heart broken to see her sit with a blank stare. He would often sit for hours talking to her but he just wanted her to relate to something he was saying, something to acknowledge their love, their relationship/companionship, their hobbies, holidays or kids. He understood her condition & he understood that she wouldn't have long to live but he just wanted one lasting moment with her.

As simple as it sounds, I suggested he wore his white bowling jersey, it had a wee symbol of a bowl on it. Both were excellent bowlers & won many tournaments together. A couple of weeks later I spoke to him in the grounds of the hospital, he was in a much happier mood & explained that when he wore his bowling jersey his Wifes face lit up, she pointed to the wee bowling symbol on his jersey, smiled, uttered a few words & embraced him. That contact, as minimal as it was, was the connection he had yearned for, a lasting memory of the Wife, life long companion, mother of his children, he loved, adored & treasured.

She sadly passed a couple of months later.

as i said in my last post... Inspiring and humbling. Fantastic story hh...

[lord bunberry]

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Good to see this thread bumped again.

Truth be told I've been having an utterly ***** time of it the last few weeks. Contrary to most people who's depression and anxiety tends to get worse in the winter I tend to get worse in the summer. My hayfever and asthma plays up in the summer and that leads to my mind running away and imagining my symptoms are something far more serious than they are. I came close having my first full blown panic attack in about 2 years in Tesco a couple of weeks back, dropped my basket and ran out the door as I was sure I was going to faint and couldn't breathe, just about managed to get it under control. I've also been really short with people and become far more argumentative than usual which is always a sure sign I'm struggling a bit. This all leads to me getting very frustrated with myself and that in turn makes me more anxious which makes me frustrated again and so the circle goes on. I've also been a bit paranoid about people hiding things from me or lying to me which isn't unusual but has been under control for a long while.

As well as the above mentioned problem with my mind running away with itself regarding my hayfever and illness we have also been dealing with a family illness that has been very stressful for everyone and work has been tough lately as well. I've tried to keep busy, walked 20+ miles last weekend and climbed 2 Munros and forced myself to the Scottish Open this weekend. Trying to keep active as the urge to just lie about feeling sorry for myself is strong but I know it's unhelpful.

One of the things I hate the most about my depression is when I start being really abrupt with my family. It makes me want to be on my own all the time so that I don't take it out on others. Lying in my bed makes me feel better but I know that's not really helping.

[Pretty Boy]

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One of the things I hate the most about my depression is when I start being really abrupt with my family. It makes me want to be on my own all the time so that I don't take it out on others. Lying in my bed makes me feel better but I know that's not really helping.

Aye it's a pain in the erse as it's usually people who don't deserve it who take the brunt of it.

I'm just frustrated more than anything as I had a lot of things I was looking forward to this summer and I've ended up tolerating most of then rather than enjoying them which is annoying.

[Zazu62]

This is a great thread. I have suffered from depression and anxiety for as long as I can remember.. Things get hard I know. Recently I've found that things like eating healthy drinking lots of water, cycling and keeping active can make u feel much better. Hope this helps lol

If you are going through hell, keep going - winston Churchill

[goosano]

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Sorry, this got missed, so bumping it in case someone knows the answer.

The cynic in me says that everyone in the medical profession is scared of being sued, hence the reluctance to go against someone else's advice.

But... I really don't know. Maybe someone out there does.

GP's are free to prescribe what they want, other than a few drugs that have to be initiated in hospital. It's nothing to do with fear of being sued. If someone has complex mental health issues a GP may be reluctant to change treatment because doing so often means titrating treatment in and out and can make things worse. Sometimes if a number of treatments have been tried they will simply want to stick with what seems to be in part working rather than risking making things worse
Having said that, if a patient wants to change or have a change considered its not unreasonable to ask the GP to liaise with the psychiatrist by phone/email to discuss risks/benefits of changing treatment

[Mikey09]

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Good to see this thread bumped again.

Truth be told I've been having an utterly ***** time of it the last few weeks. Contrary to most people who's depression and anxiety tends to get worse in the winter I tend to get worse in the summer. My hayfever and asthma plays up in the summer and that leads to my mind running away and imagining my symptoms are something far more serious than they are. I came close having my first full blown panic attack in about 2 years in Tesco a couple of weeks back, dropped my basket and ran out the door as I was sure I was going to faint and couldn't breathe, just about managed to get it under control. I've also been really short with people and become far more argumentative than usual which is always a sure sign I'm struggling a bit. This all leads to me getting very frustrated with myself and that in turn makes me more anxious which makes me frustrated again and so the circle goes on. I've also been a bit paranoid about people hiding things from me or lying to me which isn't unusual but has been under control for a long while.

As well as the above mentioned problem with my mind running away with itself regarding my hayfever and illness we have also been dealing with a family illness that has been very stressful for everyone and work has been tough lately as well. I've tried to keep busy, walked 20+ miles last weekend and climbed 2 Munros and forced myself to the Scottish Open this weekend. Trying to keep active as the urge to just lie about feeling sorry for myself is strong but I know it's unhelpful.

I can relate to a lot of that PB. The light nights in the summer play havoc with my sleeping pattern. I actually prefer the dark nights as I feel I sleep better. Hay fever is just an added pain in the arse I could do without as just like when I get a cold I really have to watch I don't slip into the habit of locking myself away from everyone. I'm 45 today and have suffered with bipolar since I was about 21. However, I would say the past 5 years I have lived with it. Acceptance is huge. For years I wanted to, and did blame others, mostly my family. My wife got the brunt of it as I would snap at her for making me feel crap. I have learned to first and foremost step back from situations and question why she is telling me something. To be honest 9 times out of 10 it's because I'm acting strange and I can't see it. I am so lucky to have someone who is patient and understands my illness and the way it makes me act sometimes. As others have said, this thread can be a sounding board for people and is without doubt the best and most important one on this forum. Stick in mate... Good things happen to good people.

[lord bunberry]

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I can relate to a lot of that PB. The light nights in the summer play havoc with my sleeping pattern. I actually prefer the dark nights as I feel I sleep better. Hay fever is just an added pain in the arse I could do without as just like when I get a cold I really have to watch I don't slip into the habit of locking myself away from everyone. I'm 45 today and have suffered with bipolar since I was about 21. However, I would say the past 5 years I have lived with it. Acceptance is huge. For years I wanted to, and did blame others, mostly my family. My wife got the brunt of it as I would snap at her for making me feel crap. I have learned to first and foremost step back from situations and question why she is telling me something. To be honest 9 times out of 10 it's because I'm acting strange and I can't see it. I am so lucky to have someone who is patient and understands my illness and the way it makes me act sometimes. As others have said, this thread can be a sounding board for people and is without doubt the best and most important one on this forum. Stick in mate... Good things happen to good people.

Happy birthday mate.

[Mikey09]

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Happy birthday mate.

Thanks mate!!

[andrew70]

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Good to see this thread bumped again.

Truth be told I've been having an utterly ***** time of it the last few weeks. Contrary to most people who's depression and anxiety tends to get worse in the winter I tend to get worse in the summer. My hayfever and asthma plays up in the summer and that leads to my mind running away and imagining my symptoms are something far more serious than they are. I came close having my first full blown panic attack in about 2 years in Tesco a couple of weeks back, dropped my basket and ran out the door as I was sure I was going to faint and couldn't breathe, just about managed to get it under control. I've also been really short with people and become far more argumentative than usual which is always a sure sign I'm struggling a bit. This all leads to me getting very frustrated with myself and that in turn makes me more anxious which makes me frustrated again and so the circle goes on. I've also been a bit paranoid about people hiding things from me or lying to me which isn't unusual but has been under control for a long while.

As well as the above mentioned problem with my mind running away with itself regarding my hayfever and illness we have also been dealing with a family illness that has been very stressful for everyone and work has been tough lately as well. I've tried to keep busy, walked 20+ miles last weekend and climbed 2 Munros and forced myself to the Scottish Open this weekend. Trying to keep active as the urge to just lie about feeling sorry for myself is strong but I know it's unhelpful.

I can relate to all this as well and what Mikey09 said a wee bit further on. I am winter person always have been and I hate the bright, summer days. The brightness irritates me, the warmth annoys me further, I sweat profusely (embarrassing) and in an unfortunate way I hate how everyone seems so cheery with it all and I am stuck being me.

I've been really struggling of late and as you say doing things has been forced rather than wanting to do them. Also looking for excuses not to do things although I think that is exacerbated by being skint.

I've also been made homeless. My mum and dad are wanting me out the house, the council don't want to know. Apparently 18k should be more than enough to rent my own home and pay all the bills. I am currently staying on my mates couch but that's no good for anyone as he has a young kid who he gets 3-4 nights a week.

The one person I normally talk to is going through stuff of her own so don't want to burden her with any of my nonsense.

I've been keeping going with my running and playing golf to keep active but it's the lack of fight that gets me.

As you say it's hard to break that circle, when you are in it, of depressed anxiety.

Stick in mate.

[Mikey09]

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I can relate to all this as well and what Mikey09 said a wee bit further on. I am winter person always have been and I hate the bright, summer days. The brightness irritates me, the warmth annoys me further, I sweat profusely (embarrassing) and in an unfortunate way I hate how everyone seems so cheery with it all and I am stuck being me.

I've been really struggling of late and as you say doing things has been forced rather than wanting to do them. Also looking for excuses not to do things although I think that is exacerbated by being skint.

I've also been made homeless. My mum and dad are wanting me out the house, the council don't want to know. Apparently 18k should be more than enough to rent my own home and pay all the bills. I am currently staying on my mates couch but that's no good for anyone as he has a young kid who he gets 3-4 nights a week.

The one person I normally talk to is going through stuff of her own so don't want to burden her with any of my nonsense.

I've been keeping going with my running and playing golf to keep active but it's the lack of fight that gets me.

As you say it's hard to break that circle, when you are in it, of depressed anxiety.

Stick in mate.

The council have a duty of care to you if you are homeless... As you have a young child this should prioritise you. Maybe someone with a bit more insight can give you the advice and info you need.

[andrew70]

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The council have a duty of care to you if you are homeless... As you have a young child this should prioritise you. Maybe someone with a bit more insight can give you the advice and info you need.

It's my mate, who I am staying with, who has the kid. He has joint custody so see's him at least three times a week. I am glad he's put me up for just now but council say I could be homeless for a while. They are looking into alternative accomodation i.e. B&B's and keep informing me of houses that I could be private renting in the local area.

That option is far too expensive for me with the cheapest rent approx £500 per month with council tax, bills and food I will have literally £100 left for the month at the very most.

[liamh2202]

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It's my mate, who I am staying with, who has the kid. He has joint custody so see's him at least three times a week. I am glad he's put me up for just now but council say I could be homeless for a while. They are looking into alternative accomodation i.e. B&B's and keep informing me of houses that I could be private renting in the local area.

That option is far too expensive for me with the cheapest rent approx £500 per month with council tax, bills and food I will have literally £100 left for the month at the very most.

Have you looked into the option of housing benefit. On your wage I'd imagine you are entitled to some to help with private let. I used this option in the past

[Hibrandenburg]

I don't suffer from depression but this thread has certainly changed a few of my views on it. Good luck to all you guys who have to fight this on a daily basis.

[Mikey09]

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It's my mate, who I am staying with, who has the kid. He has joint custody so see's him at least three times a week. I am glad he's put me up for just now but council say I could be homeless for a while. They are looking into alternative accomodation i.e. B&B's and keep informing me of houses that I could be private renting in the local area.

That option is far too expensive for me with the cheapest rent approx £500 per month with council tax, bills and food I will have literally £100 left for the month at the very most.

Sorry mate... Read that wrong!

[andrew70]

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Have you looked into the option of housing benefit. On your wage I'd imagine you are entitled to some to help with private let. I used this option in the past

When I had a meeting with the council they said I wouldn't be entitled to anything unfortunately.

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Sorry mate... Read that wrong!

No worries at all! Thanks for taking time to reply to me

[Liam89]

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Good to see this thread bumped again.

Truth be told I've been having an utterly ***** time of it the last few weeks. Contrary to most people who's depression and anxiety tends to get worse in the winter I tend to get worse in the summer. My hayfever and asthma plays up in the summer and that leads to my mind running away and imagining my symptoms are something far more serious than they are. I came close having my first full blown panic attack in about 2 years in Tesco a couple of weeks back, dropped my basket and ran out the door as I was sure I was going to faint and couldn't breathe, just about managed to get it under control. I've also been really short with people and become far more argumentative than usual which is always a sure sign I'm struggling a bit. This all leads to me getting very frustrated with myself and that in turn makes me more anxious which makes me frustrated again and so the circle goes on. I've also been a bit paranoid about people hiding things from me or lying to me which isn't unusual but has been under control for a long while.

As well as the above mentioned problem with my mind running away with itself regarding my hayfever and illness we have also been dealing with a family illness that has been very stressful for everyone and work has been tough lately as well. I've tried to keep busy, walked 20+ miles last weekend and climbed 2 Munros and forced myself to the Scottish Open this weekend. Trying to keep active as the urge to just lie about feeling sorry for myself is strong but I know it's unhelpful.

I've had a real hard time of late with anxiety which has in turn spiraled into a bout of depression. I've been reading through this thread whenever I'm sat feeling sorry for myself and I appreciate and relate to a lot of your posts.

My hypochondria has turned into an almost unmanageable anxiety over my health at times. A month or so back I was on holiday with my girlfriend and had a panic attack for the first time, felt like I was going to drop dead and had no idea what was happening. The rest of the holiday was me acting normal trying not to ruin it for my GF whilst fighting to get my breathing under control and feel normal, I could barely leave the hotel. When my mind is distracted I tend to feel normal but as soon as I have a day off or have time to myself a wave of depression hits me and a sea of negative thoughts enter my mind, I've never felt like this before and I don't know how to get my mental health back to how it was a year ago. Hope all is well with you and all the other posters on this thread, I thank everyone for sharing as it really does help.

[MSK]

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I've had a real hard time of late with anxiety which has in turn spiraled into a bout of depression. I've been reading through this thread whenever I'm sat feeling sorry for myself and I appreciate and relate to a lot of your posts.

My hypochondria has turned into an almost unmanageable anxiety over my health at times. A month or so back I was on holiday with my girlfriend and had a panic attack for the first time, felt like I was going to drop dead and had no idea what was happening. The rest of the holiday was me acting normal trying not to ruin it for my GF whilst fighting to get my breathing under control and feel normal, I could barely leave the hotel. When my mind is distracted I tend to feel normal but as soon as I have a day off or have time to myself a wave of depression hits me and a sea of negative thoughts enter my mind, I've never felt like this before and I don't know how to get my mental health back to how it was a year ago. Hope all is well with you and all the other posters on this thread, I thank everyone for sharing as it really does help.

Sorry to hear that mate, anxiety is a tricky one, Ive been & still am in the same boat as you. After a recent health issue I started having anxiety attacks, some for fairly prolonged periods & almost impossible to control, I see them as "tidal" they tend to come in waves, some mornings I wake up & have the nauseus feeling in my stomach then the dark thoughts. Breathing techniques do tend to relieve the panic side for a period but the nausea & darkness remain for up to a day or so, sometimes longer.

I always use the analogy that with depression you care or worry about absolutely nothing, but with anxiety you care & worry about absolutely everything, no matter how trivial.

Thankfully I have good support from my GP & on my days off work I try to get as much exercise done as I feel that tends to reduce my anxiety too. Thus far Ive had far more good days than bad days & as days go by I feel the anxiety reducing. Try & get GP advice, even if its just talking to him/her, you may find that may help.

Good luck mate, its a horrible thing to go through.