Bird dropping remover

[Hibbyradge]

Can anyone recommend a good product for removing seagull crap from my house windows and from the car?

As an aside, I did find this, which I do hope is real, not because I want to order it, but because it's a good video.

Oops, the link won't work because of the swear filter. If you want to see it, you'll need to work out what the missing letters are!

[H18sry]

Dave, for the car put a bit of kitchen roll over the bird pooh then pour hot water over it, let it cool then it should just wipe off.

[SiMar]

Also take Bird Poo off the car asap as it is corrosive and can literally eat through the lacquer....same goes for tree sap.

If after you ahve taken it off you can still see a mark where it has been...looks a bit like a water stain on wood then you should be able to polish it...use a polish with a gentle 'cut' in it to help remove the damaged laquer...give it a rub up with a finishing polish and job done. Be careful though and don't 'cut' too much!!

If the hot water tip doesn't work then you can get a wee bit more agressive...use hot soapy water and a non stick (i.e non scatch) washing up pad...this gives a low level of abrasion that helps remove the stuck on poo. Again be v.careful and always polish the area you have worked on after.

[steakbake]

Chisel and wire wool for the really stubborn bits?

[Doddie]

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Chisel and wire wool for the really stubborn bits?

Brillo pads.


Sand blaster.



Dynamite.

[speedy_gonzales]

For the car, I've always found a toilet wipe (wet ones?) laid over the affected area held in place with a wad of toilet paper soaked in warm (not hot) water, away and have a cup of tea, then remove paper wad and use toilet wipe to clean up the now softened mess. Works a treat every time. A wet towel does the same job, just a matter of getting it warm and wet and keeping it that way for a bit!

[Peevemor]

If all else fails, you should be able to remove even the most stubborn keech with one of these.

5500-1.JPG

[matty_f]

Surprised nobody has mentioned walnuts yet..

[heretoday]

Soak the offending spot and work away at it with a bit of wood i.e. a non-abrasive surface.

[easty]

Gypsies tears work a treat.

[Bad Martini]

These are all short term measures which don't solve the actual problem which is the godforsaken birds who, if left unchecked, will kill us all with H5N1.

So, the answer is to buy a double barrell shotgun, take aim and blooter as many of the little *******s as you can. Upside is, you'll be doing the world a favour, saving the NHS untold trillions in costs from the avian flu AND saving your hoose from being covered in bird ****.

Simples?

ENDOF

[heretoday]

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These are all short term measures which don't solve the actual problem which is the godforsaken birds who, if left unchecked, will kill us all with H5N1.

So, the answer is to buy a double barrell shotgun, take aim and blooter as many of the little *******s as you can. Upside is, you'll be doing the world a favour, saving the NHS untold trillions in costs from the avian flu AND saving your hoose from being covered in bird ****.

Simples?

ENDOF

Yes, well.....er......just keep working away with that bit of wood, eh?

[One Day Soon]

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Surprised nobody has mentioned walnuts yet..

Or ball bearings.They're very efffective especially when used with sand.

[heretoday]

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Or ball bearings.They're very efffective especially when used with sand.

Or rusty kitchen knives made wet by virgins' perspiration.

You'd have to search outside Gorgie though.......

[Jack]

I use almost neat car shampoo in a spray before i properly wash the car. I have some ready made up.

start off by doing that then get the bucket filled up and all the othetr bits and bobs then go out and wash it.

F'in hate seagulls

F'in hate seagulls that have been eating berries and leave pink poo all over the car

[heretoday]

We have jackdaws living in the chimney and strutting about in their jaunty way on the roof.

They are a bunch of utter xxxxs.

[Hibbyradge]

Thanks for all the suggestions, folks.

I wasn't sure which of them would work the best, so I followed them all, just to be sure.

Here's a picture of me inspecting my handy work.